Five-things Prompt 1.02

[advection]

Five things Daniel wishes he could tell his parents.

Comments

[anonymous]

1. He might not have published in a while, but he’s traveled to different planets.
2. And he’s learned a few more languages too.
3. “This is what a dead language sounds like, millennia after it’s stopped being spoken. Oh yes, and this is my wife.”
4. Actually, he really wishes he could tell them that he’d had a wife, he’d really gotten married, and she’d died and he’s really, really tired of everyone he loves leaving him.
5. It’s a cliché. He doesn’t care. He wishes he could tell them that he loves them.

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These are terrific. I love the delivery/timing of #3. And in both #3 and #1, the way Daniel's sense-of-wonder comes through, the eager way a kid wants to tell his parents about the totally cool things he's gotten to do and learn ... but also the sense that he's been in a dialogue with his parents about his career for his whole life. And #4 is very heart-tugging -- just the right tone to convey the little boy who must live inside the experience-hardened man somewhere ... who would think that anything sappy is kind of icky but is angry and bewildered about having his heart broken and could really use a hug from his mom and dad.

[anonymous]

who would think that anything sappy is kind of icky but is angry and bewildered about having his heart broken and could really use a hug from his mom and dad.

In the original version, I was going to put that he wanted a hug--but, like you said, it seemed too sappy/out of context.

I'm so glad these worked!

[starglyph]

Loved #1-- It's a weird part of human nature, but sometimes they all forget that different planets thing :)

[deejay435]

1) That he was glad of the chance to live in Egypt as a young boy. That life prepared him for life on Abydos, something he wouldn't trade for all the knowledge in the universe

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I love the idea of #1, that he's thankful for the start they gave him in life. Love how #2 talks about Sha're as she'd have related to his parents and how his parents would have reacted to his effect on her, instead of just how he felt about her. #3 gave me a smile just when I needed it, and I can totally imagine Daniel wondering about #4 and concluding exactly that. And #5! That last sentence is wonderful and so sad.

[deejay435]

Thank you so much, I'm glad the list made you smile and was sad at the same time, that's what I was going for.

[starglyph]

#4 I love references to younger Daniel and also, how you shpw that with all that genius brain, he still questions himself.

[sef1029]

Five things Daniel wishes he could tell his parents

[jenlev]

ah, sweet and vital about the burst of joy. and wonderful plan for his retirement.

and #3 is so poignant and i love how you write his interaction with sha'uri.

and his repsonse to nick's death feels very him.

[sef1029]

Thank you! I had to google to make sure Budge was a real figure...and he definitely is.

[jenlev]

although daniel would say he's not a figure of great stature? er, is that the right word? ;)