Regret and hope

[sethisalive]

A super amazing pal very-wisely told me that what I need to do to move on from this pseudo-relationship-mess that happened on and off for the last four years is to come to a point where I don't regret anything from the past.

No more "if only"s, no more "but if"s, no more justifying what he did or I did, no more wishing I would've or he could've or

Comments

[sethisalive]

Thanks for the insights. :) I'm a big fan of working with what is without being too agnostic of the future. The problem is when the future is so uncertain yet we want a certain goal/end so much that we make up incorrect assumptions about the feasibility/certainty of the goal/end or do other silly things when we could be doing not-so-silly things instead.

[sethisalive]

Yeah, intention is a sticky subject. But it helps to hear the acknowledgment from someone else that indeed all relationships involve risk of hurting someone. Is it intentional hurt when I say that I'm pretty darn certain that I will hurt someone, but hurt them passively by not being available? The causality seems mucked up, not linear enough to blame myself. I'll run with that :) Hopefully (hope!) I won't hurt anyone.

[nyuanshin]

That's one of my favorite House lines ever. I made a more hard-nosed post about it a while back, but I like yours better: hope as the temporal mirror-image of regret is one of those things that seems obvious in retrospect but just never occurred to me. Nicely put.

[sethisalive]

Thanks, dude! :) I guess I missed that post of yours, but I like it, too. Hard-nosed in the style of House.

[queueball]

"Hope is regret, but in the future." That's going in my Top Five Laconic Statements of Devastating Truth, between "depression is lack of grief" and "violence is the absence of conflict."

[sethisalive]

I'm glad, Q-sters. Thanks for sharing two of your Top Five, equally appreciated :)

[queueball]

George Carlin may have been riffing on this, you know, when he said, in the sensitive and loving way only he could: "Fuck hope." ;)