( Read more... )

my grandmother had two strokes and died last night.
my mother didn't call me to tell me.

I found out today when I called home.
it was an "oh, by the way" thing.

I've been in shock for hours.

I called in to work for tomorrow and the store manager picked up.
I told him what happened and he said "ouch."

this is all for now.

( Read more... )

I have my first job interview at 4.
I'm nervous.
I want it badly.

EDIT;
I GOT IT!
It's a trial basis but whatever.
I'm proud, I'm excited.

Some days
I'm two seconds away from relapsing.

I wish it were a joke.
It all comes out one big joke.

I hate myself.

My depression is back full force ( Read more... )

I spent the majority of my day with Chris.
Each passing day I love him more and more.
It's endless.
I can't sleep right now.

I can still smell him on my skin.

I really need to buy cigarettes.
And get to sleep.

I'm reading Brass by Helen Walsh.
I'm going to feel crushed when I finish it.
I'm extremely close.

I need a new book, a pack of cigarettes and liquor.
Whiskey is what I need.