The univeral soldier was once very short

[sealwhiskers]

I have been thinking a lot over the last week and a half, living in my head. I do other things too, I write, I walk, I've proctored tests, I've hung out with friends and kissed the geek, but all along, there has been a part of me solidly living somewhere else. There has been so much anger, disappointment, on-the-fly solutions, musing from above or

Comments

[abomvubuso]

That boy is still there. Yes, the boy you never met but whom you knew so well. He's there, underneath all the layers of dust and scars that the years have piled over him. Never forget that. The boy who believed in what's right, is not gone. You just need to look somewhat closer, and you'll see him. You might be surprised.

[sealwhiskers]

The reason ppl sometimes don't look closer on those close ones who hurt them, is because they don't want to see parts of themselves looking back.

But yes, we agree. This post is a way for me to do that.

[abomvubuso]

No matter how he has hurt you, deep down he never meant it. I'm sure you know that. You're his flesh and blood. I'm sure he never forgets that thought.

[sealwhiskers]

You are kind, and certainly have a point, but I don't really want to make this about me, although it's of course impossible to separate on such a close range. I guess I mean to say that I'm not forever hurt or any such thing, it's just that our relationship is full of complications that probably will never fit into some happy family frame.

My attempts at honesty are as muddled as ever. :)

[shipbuilding]

This was beautiful.

I've been thinking about this sort of thing, loosely connected, a lot. My dad told my mom that if I weren't his daughter, he thought we would have been friends. I thought this was funny because if we were just friends, I would probably tell him when he was being an asshole a lot more frequently.

[sealwhiskers]

Thank you my lobster bisque. And thank you for being one of the few lgt ladies left here. I keep thinking these are the stories we should have kept on sharing here. There are stories from others I would love to read, perhaps less serious, but still stories. Facebook doesn't feel like it has any stories.

[shipbuilding]

I understand you completely. Facebook is like a big never-ending cocktail party/class reunion (so I assume).

[gale_storm]

Gaaah!!! Yes, it feels like that to me, too. Unfortunately, there does seem to be things that go on there that *don't* go on anywhere else, so I have to keep checking Arsebook (as I tend to think of it), frustratingly so.

[striver]

Nod nod. It seems a time for thought lately. My parents have been gone for many years but it seems my relationship with them has still continued to change in my own mind as I have aged and gained better understanding. There was a letter in Dear Abby recently. Someone wrote they were Baptist but they were troubled by the idea of heaven because they didn't want to spend eternity with their family.

[sealwhiskers]

Someone wrote they were Baptist but they were troubled by the idea of heaven because they didn't want to spend eternity with their family.

Bwahaha! Omg, ain't that the truth. Before I left Catholicism and altered my whole view on heaven and hell, I used to as a child ponder how heaven could really be so wonderful, if you had to share eternity with people you loved and wished well, but who you really didn't want to strictly hang around with that much. :)

[zombienought]

I gave up on Heaven when they told me
dogs didn't have souls, and wouldn't
be there.

[sealwhiskers]

Dogs SO have souls!

[st_rev]

My dad was my best friend. I miss him terribly.

[sealwhiskers]

I would miss my best friend terribly if they were gone too, I can only imagine how powerful that loss must be when the best friend is a parent or a sibling.

[asakiyume]

Thanks for remembering the father you could like, here. The man you could like, that's a person I can like, too. Thanks for witnessing for him, as they say. You put the words out here--he can never fade into oblivion now. Or, I should say, his ripple is that much wider.

[sealwhiskers]

I like how you phrased that. I guess I *am* witnessing for him in a sense, because he surely doesn't talk about that time ever anymore.