It's true. To date, it remains the tackiest thing I have ever seen. It wasn't *just* the neon pink and orange-painted shells adorning the crucifix, it was that they were painted so incredibly *badly*.
And, wasn't it actually a nightlight?
You should have got the Jesus action figure. I mean, dude, it was *Jesus*.
I admit that I cannot imagine the tackiness. That said, I know for a solid fact that I have personally seen shit just as tacky, which I am utterly at a loss to describe to you except to say, well, have you ever seen those lighted beer signs that have a vaguely "moving" waterfall? Well.
I saw this framed, lighted picture, that, I swear, was framed in something that looked like black velvet, which showed Jesus being baptized by John the Baptist (or, I guess, having just BEEN baptized) in a moving "river." And I know you will not ever believe this but the bottom of the sign said "JESUS IS LIFE" in lighted yellow letters.
I wanted it so very, very badly. Unfortunately I think the people selling it were doing so ironically, because they wanted like 200 bucks for it, and I just couldn't pull the trigger. Having passed the age of 30, I just don't enjoy irony as much as I used to, so now my irony needs to be relatively inexpensive.
Yeah, I hear you. There was a time in my life that I would have dropped $200 on such an item just for the "can you believe this?" factor of displaying it in my home. Nowadays, not so much.
Still, if I see the Deluxe Miracle Jesus Action Figure again, and I have $20 in my wallet... he may be coming home with me.
Now, I'm happy to admit that I'm as well-schooled on the New Testament as I could be... but I've been thus far unaware of the passage where Jesus' hands glowed in the dark.
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And, wasn't it actually a nightlight?
You should have got the Jesus action figure. I mean, dude, it was *Jesus*.
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I saw this framed, lighted picture, that, I swear, was framed in something that looked like black velvet, which showed Jesus being baptized by John the Baptist (or, I guess, having just BEEN baptized) in a moving "river." And I know you will not ever believe this but the bottom of the sign said "JESUS IS LIFE" in lighted yellow letters.
I wanted it so very, very badly. Unfortunately I think the people selling it were doing so ironically, because they wanted like 200 bucks for it, and I just couldn't pull the trigger. Having passed the age of 30, I just don't enjoy irony as much as I used to, so now my irony needs to be relatively inexpensive.
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Still, if I see the Deluxe Miracle Jesus Action Figure again, and I have $20 in my wallet... he may be coming home with me.
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Thanks for enlightening me!
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;-)
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