(Untitled)

[sdlucly]

So, about an hour ago I got my third call from an "Unknown number". All three calls have been calls that barely lasted two seconds before ending, meaning they wouldn't even give me the time to pick up. Like, they were just ringing me for me to call them, you know

Comments

[the_dead_dream]

It could be him. Even though the time line it's totally fucked up.
Maybe it is him. Maybe he doesn't know what to say and chickens out before you actually pick up. He knows hes screwed up the best thing hes ever had.

[sdlucly]

Yes, I know it could be him. I kinda want it to be him, of course, and... dude, it could be him realizing he's been an idiot, being certain that I wouldn't last two weeks without calling him to see if we could "fix this" and maybe even given up entirely in the STUPID NOTION that I want to have a boyfriend that's actually in the same freaking zip code as I am. Maybe he's been waiting for that but it's been two weeks and three days and I sure as hell haven't called

[the_dead_dream]

I want it to be that, I want it to be like a story that you're writing and after a time the guy calls and realizes the error of his ways and how he's just so freaking in love with you and wants to do whatever it takes to make it work.
I get that. I really do. I guess everyone wants to believe that things
can actually work out like that. That sometimes it can really happen, and I don't know if it can. But if it's really meant to be, you and him together, it will happen.

And the rule says that when you've been nine years with a guy and you haven't gotten married, when he's spent the last two and a half years abroad and you've only seen him 3 months out of 36, things are not really working, things are long fucked up.Nine years is along time to be together without really commiting to each other. It looks like you should at least be engaged.. right? And going that long without seeing each other I dont even think that would be called a relationship, that's just really fucked up and I'm sorry that you have to go through this but in the

[pr_scatterbrain]

It's not exactly the song you requested, but whenever I feel like I'm about to fall apart, I listen to this.

[pr_scatterbrain]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eetIgGXH6DA - The Mountain Goats - This year.(sorry, my embedding sucks)

Maybe you'll like some of these. Idk.

[the_dead_dream]

Just walk away
Gather your thoughts for the second wave
Of this argument on this epic changing day
Its crazy to think that an hour ago all things were great
But we stand here both proud both wrong and right
Throwing cheap shots in this stubborn fight
And our lives are so intertwined in one

-Goodbye Waves & Driveways by Rocket Summer

I felt you slip away
Far away from me
Further from me
You seem to drift
Caught myself wishing you back, as I fight to catch you
Anger
Wells inside me

Reflections - From Autumn To Ashes

Now that you're gone yeah I see what you mean to me
I know that it's wrong but I'm too blind and I can't see
Now that you're gone I can't help feeling all alone
I know that it's wrong I sit and wait by the telephone
I'm waiting for you to call
Miss you so much I can't sleep
Can't even stand on my own two feet
And I can't take this anymore

Miss You - Not By Choice

You're doin' it again, you know