[ Voice - 014 ]

[knows_it_all]

I can't remember the last time I felt this exhausted

Comments

[ voice | locked ]

[sakurabito]

Enough chatter, Kunsel. Your explanation.

[ He's heard about it, but details are always nice. ]

[ voice | locked ]

[knows_it_all]

Of course.

[To the point, as expected. And it brings a small smile to Kunsel's lips which cannot be seen. He likes that you're dependable, Byakuya.]

The elves abducted Natives and Scorched alike, holding them within cages in their camp. This was made possible due to a special serum they used on the points of their weapons, a poison that neutralized powers, and even rendered the victim temporarily unconscious. As I'm sure you're already aware, the purpose of this was to utilize the captives as a food source. The Natives that were caught were subject to this end before Scorched were kidnapped. To my knowledge I'm the only one of the Scorched that met the same end . . . although it is quite possible that Arthur Pendragon has also, and even [-he manages to keep his voice steady-] Elena. There are others who have disappeared since then, too. But again, I'm sure you're aware of that

[ voice | locked ]

[sakurabito]

[ Yes. Such unpleasant memories. He'd like to forget them, if possible. But he takes the report, things he'd gathered, things he knew, things he had not bee quite aware of, and puts them together in a little mental folder for later. ]

Do you believe dying a hero will absolve you of your crimes?

[ voice | locked ]

[knows_it_all]

Nothing will make right the fact that I took a life without fair judgment having been first passed, or an order being given. Nothing makes it right that I acted rashly, and in doing so, killed someone I had meant to bring to justice

[video]

[bedsidemanners]

Back home, or here?

[video]

[knows_it_all]

Whichever you feel comfortable sharing.

[video]

[bedsidemanners]

I wouldn't say I was fighting for anything or anyone in particular over here.

[video]

[knows_it_all]

Maybe with time you'll find something or someone. Or both.

[voice | private]

[firebornfidelis]

That's a lot of questions, Kunsel. I'm not sure I can answer all of them so easily.

[There is a hint of the slightest wry smile in her voice, a subdued affection.]

But who and what I fight for... that's both a simple and complicated explanation. Reasons for things like that always are. Like you, I fight for a dreamer and a dream. I fight for the one who fights for everyone but himself. And I fight to protect everyone that I can. I fight to survive. And I fight in the hope that one day I can do enough good to even begin to atone for the sins I have committed.

[voice | private]

[knows_it_all]

I think atonement is everlasting, but not in a bad way. What we've done wrong is something that needs to stay with us, or we run the risk of making those same mistakes twice. At least, that's how I feel. Yeah, I think people can be forgiven, can repent, but it is definitely not something that can ever be put behind us, no matter the severity of the crime.

But I think everyone does things at some point in their life that they will carry with them always. I think even the act of trying to atone is worthy enough of being acknowledged, especially when it comes to someone like you, Riza.

Someone who is strong and sincere, whose heart is honest.

[voice | private]

[firebornfidelis]

I don't expect ever to be forgiven and I can't ever forget. War isn't something that leaves you. Or at least I know it will never leave me. I will spend the rest of my life trying to make up for what I've done and I don't know if that's how anyone else feels about it, but I can't feel any other way. I don't need to be acknowledged, I just need to do something good.

But I like to think that I would have wanted to do the same thing, do good things for other people, even if I had never gone to the front lines and seen what I saw.

[voice | private]

[knows_it_all]

I guess acknowledgment isn't needed, but it sure is nice. I mean, I won't say I haven't done bad things that I wanna make up for, that I'll spend my whole life trying to make up for, because I have. And I really don't expect to be forgiven per se...but I do want the effort I make to be recognized. Not rewarded, but just...noticed. Seen. Maybe appreciated. I don't want to feel like I am taking steps in the right direction only to be knocked back down when I get to where I'm headed because somebody who holds a grudge can't let go. And maybe they have a right not to let go, but that kinda attitude is just gonna breed more bad blood, you know? So maybe what I want is a little selfish, but I like to think I want it for good reasons. If...I'm working to heal things, then I want them to heal. I don't want those wounds to forever fester.

Does that...make sense?

Video.

[onequarter]

Your sense of purpose is... something I can admire.

Video.

[knows_it_all]

Hey, it only exists because people like you are worth fighting for, and along side of. Because there are good people out there. Wouldn't have much of a purpose without them, now would I?

Video.

[onequarter]

I suppose... not.

[Voice]

[knows_it_all]

It's good to be back. And thanks, Lelouch. [See, he told you that he'd remember you.]

Still on about my optimism, huh? You should try it for a bit. It feels good to be positive about some things, you know?

[Voice]

[knows_it_all]

[Sadly, it's a joke Kunsel finds a little humorous, too.]

Well, I'd say it's a start, but only just barely.