and the stream runs in circles from the chasm to the core

Jun 23, 2011 19:57

Who: MULTIPLE THREADS! Expected: there are some plans. Unexpected: how would I know?
When: Right after this-with flexibility. All sparked by this after this.
Where: The Clinic
Format: [hates choosing] Whatever I start with, do your own thing!
What: Tonks visitations. Lupin's return. Shirley in da house. Trepkos the Grouch. AND MORE.
Warnings: Ow ow ( Read more... )

lust, shirley, daniel trepkos, river tam, heine rammsteiner, remus lupin, nymphadora tonks

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lumenrelegandus June 30 2011, 05:08:53 UTC
Really Shirley. Tell me.

[He doesn't get up and pace; but something behind his eyes is rushing furiously]

That she'll only come back. So I'll kill her again. And again. And again. And never stop. And half the time instead she'll likely kill me. And even if not, it's playing exactly into her hands, because isn't that exactly what she did to Dora? Only I'd be going along, playing her game, willingly? Turning myself into a killer?

Is that really reason enough? Is keeping my own hands clean anything more than vanity when the longer she's left to run unchecked the longer she'll hurt people who deserve it still less I do-even less than Dora can-because they don't even know her, never disagreed with her, never took up arms against her, never signed on to participate in her war at all?

I suppose if not for my own sake, I should refrain from becoming the worst possibility of myself for the sake of others-but we can see how well that works when she gets them anyway. Which is better: that I'm there to comfort them after she's through, or ( ... )

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thenobledie June 30 2011, 10:18:18 UTC
[shirley is still as she listens, but once, she inclines her head the slightest. aware of their hidden audience. and the heaviness of the air around them frightens the pixie - or maybe it's lupin, really -, and he forgoes his nap to hide behind shirley's neck, hidden between ginger locks and protected by a warmth he knows is false.]

You know. What I say makes no difference.

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lumenrelegandus June 30 2011, 16:09:16 UTC
[a stillness and centredness comes back behind his eyes and he focused them on her, unhappy]

I hoped you'd know this about me, Shirley.

I know many people ask questions only ready to hear the answers they want.

I'd hoped you would know I'm not one of them.

If I ask a question, it means the answer may make a difference. If I have no intention of listening, I don't ask.

Especially when there are no answers I want.

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thenobledie June 30 2011, 16:33:12 UTC
[shirley's response... is to laugh. well, chuckle. it's slight, but she does.]

You were not made for war.

[an answer. but a hollow one.]

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lumenrelegandus June 30 2011, 17:25:11 UTC
[a very sad laugh in return: he agrees with her]

Unfortunately, wars don't necessarily go away for refusing to fight them.

[he's tried to convince her not to fight. Before he'd even met Shirley, before Tonks was here, he'd tried to convince Lestrange. Twice.

…Twice. That's all? When he'd just talked about continuous killing of unlimited incarnations?

His eyes flickered back to Shirley.]

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thenobledie June 30 2011, 17:39:39 UTC
[as she stands:]

And the wise know when such war is best left in others' hands.

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lumenrelegandus July 4 2011, 04:52:30 UTC
[stands instantly to counter her. The look in his eyes is of instant understanding-and with it foreboding, amazement, and… anger.

Seems braced to stop her if she tries to further move.

…But finds he can't initially speak.

He's proved himself insufficient to reliably beat Bellatrix. He is one of the few people in Anatole capable of matching her, hence the feeling of responsibility. But-speaking of vanity-if what he really cared about was her defeat, what does it matter who achieves it? Why would he argue against the involvement of someone more powerful than both of them? Was personal vengeance, or sense of responsibility more important?

…"Sense of responsibility". For whom? For Bellatrix? -as if he'd inflicted her on Anatole. She was who and what she was. She turned a bit more of her specific focus on him but it wasn't about him, he fit certain criteria… oh my head. (And she'd been here first.) For Tonks? -for a man who hadn't a misogynistic or even machismic bone in his body, the should be able to protect my wife instinct was ( ... )

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thenobledie July 4 2011, 05:21:32 UTC
[she waits. patient. wanting to step away but knowing the conversation is not over. and when he finally speaks, shirley only shrugs. (still hiding in her hair, the pixie hugs close. lupin is a terrifying person...)]

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lumenrelegandus July 4 2011, 05:40:49 UTC
[Lupin is not a legilimens, but sometimes he sure seems it.

Though only peripherally aware of the pixie's presence, he nonetheless must pick up the feeling in the air.

He doesn't want to be scary. The fact that he can't scare Shirley isn't the point. It's not the way for him to be.

So, though the impulse is to grab her arm, he only does so after a second's pause. Then with deliberation-and not a grab at all but a gentle brush of her arm with his hand, barely even making contact. Mostly to make a point.]

I wasn't asking you.

I don't imagine it would be undue influence that caused you make any decision, even if I had.

[a trace of warm amusement there: like coming to the Clinic, after he asked, but not until it was her own idea.]

But if…

[huge assumptions to make here. Huge presumptions. On the nature of this conversation, their relationship, Shirley herself.]

…I can't be protected by being excluded. It won't achieve optimal results, anyway. I wouldn't sit by to see someone fight this war for me. For me. [in either sense. Not ( ... )

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thenobledie July 4 2011, 06:17:36 UTC
[were shirley still new to her physical form, she would have pulled away. instead, her hand simply twitches. the pixie is not buying this, though, and moves with her as she inclines her head. in this moment, he is so much like syuveil that it hurts.

she failed syuveil.

she will not fail remus or nymphadora or lust.]

I had no thoughts to exclude you.

[she only shrugged because she doesn't know what she will do yet... but this is shirley, and it isn't as though she wouldn't, say, just withhold certain things for any reason. but not the bigger picture.]

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lumenrelegandus July 4 2011, 07:14:40 UTC
[stands still; spent and unsure what, if anything, to do next.

Not wanting to impose what would probably not be welcome… But not moving away either…

It's the first time he's seen Shirley looking like… well, like she could do with a hug.

Attempts to give one verbally in the way he says,]

Thank you.

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thenobledie July 4 2011, 07:44:53 UTC
[not at all what she wants. or likes. still miffed, still confused how they got this far, still overwhelmed by the memory of syuveil.

excuse her as she sidesteps him and waves her hand dismissively. feelings are hard, ok.]

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lumenrelegandus July 5 2011, 01:21:34 UTC
[whatever else he can and can't do, he takes cues.

With a nod of clear yes, they are, quite okay he'll head out of the room.]

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