Fallout fic: The Car Incident
Title: The Car Incident
Characters: Tabitha, Raul, Cuddles.
Rating: Worksafe, gen, contains your garden-variety super mutant violence.
Word count: 483
Summary: Minimizing fuel emissions is Utobitha's #1 priority.
--
Tabitha was reviewing a few policies when she heard people shouting outside the radio building. She jumped to her feet, only pausing to grab her sledgehammer of office, and went to see what was happening.
The problem became clear as soon as she stepped out outdoors: one of the stupider mutants (she'd forgotten his name) had dragged Black Mountain's mechanic, Raul, from his comfortable little house, and was pulling him along the road by his left leg. Raul looked quite upset about this, which wasn't surprising, given that he was small and disgustingly weak and therefore prone to breaking easily.
Raul was state property, and the law said that damage to state property was punishable by death. (Granted, Tabitha hadn't really written that law down anywhere, but that didn't really matter because the majority of mutants were illiterate.) Tabitha couldn't afford to let just about any old nitwit mishandle the mechanic. It set a bad precedent.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Tabitha asked, using her outdoor voice.
The mutant stopped his his tracks.
Raul groaned. Tabitha could see that he had a broad cut on the side of his puny, easily-squishable head. It was a wonder that the mutant hadn't popped his skull like an over-ripe mutfruit, as Tabitha had been tempted to do many times.
"MECHANIC WON'T FIX CAR," the mutant shouted back.
"FIXING CARS ISN'T PART OF HIS JOB, NUMBNUTS," Tabitha said. She idly wondered if 'numbnuts' was a vulgar word. She'd always assumed that the 'nut' part referred to a person's head, but when she paused to think about it, she supposed that it could refer to something crude, like the testicles.
"BUT I WANT CAR FIXED," the mutant snarled.
Behind him, Raul sat up slightly. He appeared to consider his situation for a moment, then lay back down again, playing dead.
"YOU DON'T EVEN BEED A CAR," Tabitha replied. She was making an effort to be reasonable, as she believed in setting a good example to others. "BY 2283, THE STATE OF UTOBITHA WILL HAVE A FULLY-FUNCTIONING CENTAUR-DRIVEN PUBLIC TRANSPORT, SUBSIDIZED BY UTOBITHA'S GOVERNMENT." She'd already designed a logo for it.
The mutant refused to see sense, however. In a fit of pique, he put his left foot over Raul's head, threatening to crush it with a single stomp. "I. WANT. CAR," he bellowed.
Tabitha was forced to take drastic measures. She bounded along the road, hefting her sledgehammer. "YOU CAN'T HAVE A CAR. YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A LICENSE," she howled, and bashed the mutant's skull in with one swing. He toppled over and collapsed in a heap on the ground, twitching as he oozed gray matter onto the tarmac.
"Cars are bad for the environment and cause congested roads during tourist season," Tabitha said, and grabbed Raul by the collar so she could drag him back to safety.
Raul didn't reply, which meant that he must have agreed.
Characters: Tabitha, Raul, Cuddles.
Rating: Worksafe, gen, contains your garden-variety super mutant violence.
Word count: 483
Summary: Minimizing fuel emissions is Utobitha's #1 priority.
--
Tabitha was reviewing a few policies when she heard people shouting outside the radio building. She jumped to her feet, only pausing to grab her sledgehammer of office, and went to see what was happening.
The problem became clear as soon as she stepped out outdoors: one of the stupider mutants (she'd forgotten his name) had dragged Black Mountain's mechanic, Raul, from his comfortable little house, and was pulling him along the road by his left leg. Raul looked quite upset about this, which wasn't surprising, given that he was small and disgustingly weak and therefore prone to breaking easily.
Raul was state property, and the law said that damage to state property was punishable by death. (Granted, Tabitha hadn't really written that law down anywhere, but that didn't really matter because the majority of mutants were illiterate.) Tabitha couldn't afford to let just about any old nitwit mishandle the mechanic. It set a bad precedent.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Tabitha asked, using her outdoor voice.
The mutant stopped his his tracks.
Raul groaned. Tabitha could see that he had a broad cut on the side of his puny, easily-squishable head. It was a wonder that the mutant hadn't popped his skull like an over-ripe mutfruit, as Tabitha had been tempted to do many times.
"MECHANIC WON'T FIX CAR," the mutant shouted back.
"FIXING CARS ISN'T PART OF HIS JOB, NUMBNUTS," Tabitha said. She idly wondered if 'numbnuts' was a vulgar word. She'd always assumed that the 'nut' part referred to a person's head, but when she paused to think about it, she supposed that it could refer to something crude, like the testicles.
"BUT I WANT CAR FIXED," the mutant snarled.
Behind him, Raul sat up slightly. He appeared to consider his situation for a moment, then lay back down again, playing dead.
"YOU DON'T EVEN BEED A CAR," Tabitha replied. She was making an effort to be reasonable, as she believed in setting a good example to others. "BY 2283, THE STATE OF UTOBITHA WILL HAVE A FULLY-FUNCTIONING CENTAUR-DRIVEN PUBLIC TRANSPORT, SUBSIDIZED BY UTOBITHA'S GOVERNMENT." She'd already designed a logo for it.
The mutant refused to see sense, however. In a fit of pique, he put his left foot over Raul's head, threatening to crush it with a single stomp. "I. WANT. CAR," he bellowed.
Tabitha was forced to take drastic measures. She bounded along the road, hefting her sledgehammer. "YOU CAN'T HAVE A CAR. YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A LICENSE," she howled, and bashed the mutant's skull in with one swing. He toppled over and collapsed in a heap on the ground, twitching as he oozed gray matter onto the tarmac.
"Cars are bad for the environment and cause congested roads during tourist season," Tabitha said, and grabbed Raul by the collar so she could drag him back to safety.
Raul didn't reply, which meant that he must have agreed.