Shopgirls (Sarah/Rose, PG)
Title: Shopgirls
Pairing: Sarah/Rose
Rating: PG13
Summary: Rose has no prospects, Sarah has a note from Romana, and the Doctor has some explaining to do. Crack!fic.
Notes: Inspired by the 'Some Mothers Do 'Ave Em' clip posted below. A crossover, of sorts.
Sarah Jane put her arm around Rose and stuck her tongue out at the Doctor's back, making Rose giggle through her tears.
"You just ignore him. There's nothing wrong with working in a shop."
"S'not quite the same as being a journalist though, is it? Or a scientist, or being top of your class at Time Lord School, or being dead good with explosives."
"Hey, I wasn't always a journalist you know. When I came back to London after university, there wasn't much work going around. Not if you were a woman, anyway."
"So what did you do?"
"I worked in a greengrocers."
Rose stared at her blankly. "What's one of them?"
Sarah buried her head in her hands and groaned. "Oh god, it's true. Everything they say about your generation, it's all true. You're all raised on fizzy pop and MacDonalds and video games. You know the fruit and veg section in Tescos?"
"Is that the bit next to the magazines?" Sarah rolled her eyes.
"Well, it was like that, except that's all the shop sold. Just fruit and veg. And then I got taken on by the Metropolitan, met the Doctor, and never looked back."
Rose dried her eyes on the sleeve of Sarah's jacket. "He can be a right bastard sometimes."
Sarah nodded. "Yep. A supercilious, arrogant bastard." Suddenly her face brightened. "Hey, want to know a secret?"
"Will it embarrass the Doctor?"
"Oh yes. You see, about six months ago I got an note in the post. Very illuminating." Sarah scrabbled around in her coat pocket, bringing out a notebook, three biros, what looked like half of K9's innards and a crumpled up piece of paper with very elegant handwriting.
It said:
He didn't pass his exams first time round, you know. And he only scraped through because he looked at the Master's answers.
Love,
Romana
PS - if you see the Doctor tell him I'm not really dead, but he will be after what he did to my bloody planet.
Rose thought for minute. "So basically what you're telling me is that the Doctor's really thick?"
"As Time Lords go, yes."
"And he just goes around with humans so that he can be cleverer than someone."
"Yes. See above re:'supercilious arrogant bastard'."
"And he told me that if I'd worked harder in school, I wouldn't have ended up working at Hendricks! Cheeky git."
"It's better than jaunting around the universe in a bloody police box!"
"Yeah, he's not exactly going to get promoted doing that, is he?"
There was a moment of self-justified silence before Rose turned to Sarah. "You know, I'm not wasting my time with someone who can't be arsed to get a proper job."
"No. You want someone with a future. I mean a real future, not just one you get to by pressing a few buttons on the Tardis console."
Rose looked expentantly at Sarah. Sarah looked back.
"So, fancy a shag then?"
"Your room or mine?"
Afterwards, when the Doctor got bored of flicking random switches in the control room and throwing spanners for K9 to fetch, he came looking for them. He stood outside Rose's door and listened to the very interesting sounds, whilst staring in confusion at the stick figure with spiky hair, standing in a red circle with a big red line running through it. The sign read 'Shopgirls only, no Doctors allowed.'
Pairing: Sarah/Rose
Rating: PG13
Summary: Rose has no prospects, Sarah has a note from Romana, and the Doctor has some explaining to do. Crack!fic.
Notes: Inspired by the 'Some Mothers Do 'Ave Em' clip posted below. A crossover, of sorts.
Sarah Jane put her arm around Rose and stuck her tongue out at the Doctor's back, making Rose giggle through her tears.
"You just ignore him. There's nothing wrong with working in a shop."
"S'not quite the same as being a journalist though, is it? Or a scientist, or being top of your class at Time Lord School, or being dead good with explosives."
"Hey, I wasn't always a journalist you know. When I came back to London after university, there wasn't much work going around. Not if you were a woman, anyway."
"So what did you do?"
"I worked in a greengrocers."
Rose stared at her blankly. "What's one of them?"
Sarah buried her head in her hands and groaned. "Oh god, it's true. Everything they say about your generation, it's all true. You're all raised on fizzy pop and MacDonalds and video games. You know the fruit and veg section in Tescos?"
"Is that the bit next to the magazines?" Sarah rolled her eyes.
"Well, it was like that, except that's all the shop sold. Just fruit and veg. And then I got taken on by the Metropolitan, met the Doctor, and never looked back."
Rose dried her eyes on the sleeve of Sarah's jacket. "He can be a right bastard sometimes."
Sarah nodded. "Yep. A supercilious, arrogant bastard." Suddenly her face brightened. "Hey, want to know a secret?"
"Will it embarrass the Doctor?"
"Oh yes. You see, about six months ago I got an note in the post. Very illuminating." Sarah scrabbled around in her coat pocket, bringing out a notebook, three biros, what looked like half of K9's innards and a crumpled up piece of paper with very elegant handwriting.
It said:
He didn't pass his exams first time round, you know. And he only scraped through because he looked at the Master's answers.
Love,
Romana
PS - if you see the Doctor tell him I'm not really dead, but he will be after what he did to my bloody planet.
Rose thought for minute. "So basically what you're telling me is that the Doctor's really thick?"
"As Time Lords go, yes."
"And he just goes around with humans so that he can be cleverer than someone."
"Yes. See above re:'supercilious arrogant bastard'."
"And he told me that if I'd worked harder in school, I wouldn't have ended up working at Hendricks! Cheeky git."
"It's better than jaunting around the universe in a bloody police box!"
"Yeah, he's not exactly going to get promoted doing that, is he?"
There was a moment of self-justified silence before Rose turned to Sarah. "You know, I'm not wasting my time with someone who can't be arsed to get a proper job."
"No. You want someone with a future. I mean a real future, not just one you get to by pressing a few buttons on the Tardis console."
Rose looked expentantly at Sarah. Sarah looked back.
"So, fancy a shag then?"
"Your room or mine?"
Afterwards, when the Doctor got bored of flicking random switches in the control room and throwing spanners for K9 to fetch, he came looking for them. He stood outside Rose's door and listened to the very interesting sounds, whilst staring in confusion at the stick figure with spiky hair, standing in a red circle with a big red line running through it. The sign read 'Shopgirls only, no Doctors allowed.'