Behind the Sex - Chapter 33
Title: Behind the Sex
Fandom(s) : U-KISS
Pairing(s): KeMaru
Rating: NC-17
Genre: AU, Romance
Warnings: Awful!English
Author's Notes: My second NaNoWriMo, and a rather bold decision, if I might say :)! Hopefully doesn't contain too much inaccuracies, and if it does, please ignore it? >_>?
Prologue :: Chapter 1 :: Chapter 2 :: Chapter 3 :: Chapter 4 :: Chapter 5 :: Chapter 6 :: Chapter 7
Chapter 8 :: Chapter 9 :: Chapter 10 :: Chapter 11 :: Chapter 12 :: Chapter 13 :: Chapter 14 :: Chapter 15
Chapter 16 :: Chapter 17 :: Chapter 18 :: Chapter 19 :: Chapter 20 :: Chapter 21 :: Chapter 22
Chapter 23 :: Chapter 24 :: Chapter 25 :: Chapter 26 :: Chapter 27 :: Chapter 28 :: Chapter 29
Chapter 30 :: Chapter 31 :: Chapter 32
Kibum folded his arms as a slight sign of impatience, but really, he was just in his most comfortable position. The younger male had taken a bit longer than usual, and upon seeing the older male in his misleading stance, Kevin hurried towards him and apologised with a sweet smile.
“Sorry, I realised I forgot to send a few of my clothes to the laundry, so I had to pick out the clean ones from the mess.” The escort scratched his head sheepishly, while Kibum merely shook his head with a similar smile.
“It’s fine, it’s not as if I have anything better to do than to wait for you.” The older spoke as he led the way towards the car park, footsteps in sync with the other. “Have I seen this outfit before?”
“You tell me.” Kevin cheekily threw the question back, smiling as Kibum thought about the issue for a moment. Did Kibum pay attention enough to realise the outfit was new? He did feel expectant, always believing the other man had an observant nature. On the other hand, he wished he stopped hoping. If Kibum did answer the question correctly, it only made things harder for Kevin.
Harder for him to remind himself that Kibum would never love him.
Kibum paused, looking at the escort from top to toe before shaking his head. “Nope, haven’t seen this before. When did you buy this?”
“You had to go to school for some lecture, and I had some free time, so I thought why not.” Kevin smiled proudly, twirling around despite his nervousness after knowing Kibum did pay attention to him afterall. He then thanked Kibum as the other held the door for him, entering the car with practiced ease.
Kibum headed across the front of the car to his seat, remembering that an influential psychologist held a talk in school three days ago, the only reason he would go back to school for in this tight period. That day had been inspiring, and it had also been the hundred and fortieth day since his project started. Only forty more days to go since then.
"Where to?" Kevin asked as he buckled his seatbelt, a small sound escaping his lips as he blew air out.
"Some gay bar." Kibum vaguely replied while mimicking Kevin’s actions, seemingly having lesser clue than Kevin did. Despite so, he stepped on the engine and drove out of the brothel's car park, bringing Kevin to where he was called for.
-
The harder he felt it was to entertain the customer before him, the scarier it was. The feeling only grew stronger, and it was difficult to keep the forced smile on his face despite his years of training.
There were so many flaws he could point out about the man he was smiling at - his bald head, his bad fashion sense, his wrinkled skin and his bad breath. He used to put up with all these features that depicted the vast age gap between him and his customers, but this tolerance was unconsciously growing thin.
Why?
“Kevin, do you take alcohol well?” The man asked, one hand resting on the curves of the younger man’s. They were both sitting by the bar top, with the older of the two slightly reached over for the younger. Things were the usual, a suggestive stroke down Kevin’s waist, almost perfectly normal. And that self-satisfied smile, with teeth yellow from all the smoking he had done, along with those eyes that probably wished they could tear off Kevin’s clothes just by looking. Kevin experienced all these on a daily basis.
But he felt sick, for the very first time, with nothing to convince him to feel otherwise.
Disgusted at the touch, disgusted at the idea of the two of them together, plainly disgusted. He watched the other and tried to concentrate, nodding in hopes of hiding his voice that could easily be laced with disdain.
“Really? Well, would you like to try it from my mouth?”
Kevin grimaced internally, giving the other a soft poke with his fingers while smiling shyly to complete the act. “I can’t do that…It’s too…embarrassing…”
The man laughed heartily, then pulling Kevin by his waist and landing the younger on his lap. He reached for the younger man’s thighs and squeezed them, laughing once more when he heard a satisfying whine. “Mm, guess we will have to drink separately then.”
Kevin nodded slightly, afraid of himself. Holding the glass of wine placed on the bar top with two hands, he stared at the dark, intense red and watched his reflection from the surface of the glass.
He looked skeptical, lost, and reluctant.
How was he going to last for the hours to come?
-
“Kibummie~!” Kevin giggled into phone, not his usual self.
The said man looked troubled as he received the phone call right after dinner not because of the abrupt timing, but rather the unexpected tone of the caller. He gave it no further thought, reflexes hurrying him back into his car. Starting the engine once more to drive towards the bar he left Kevin at two hours ago, Kibum kept the phone against his ears. “Yes?”
“Kibummie…this place is really loud...” Kevin slurred, and the blaring music in the background proved his point.
“Are you drunk or are you drugged?” Kibum frowned, trying to beat a red light as he continued speeding through the road. Kevin’s reply never came, though there were some distant noises barely audible over the music.
“Don’t touch me…” The escort called weakly, sounding like he was unable to fend off any predators. “I come at a high price….”
“Kevin.” Kibum spoke strictly, calling for the younger. He still couldn’t quite grasp the situation, wary of the possibility that Kevin could be drugged and dragged off. “Kevin!”
“Kibummie…” The younger giggled as he repeated the name cutely, sighing dreamily. “Would you like some wine?”
“You’re drunk.”
Kibum slowed down significantly, as Kevin’s safety was somehow less of a threat and that he was arriving at his destination. He gave up trying to engage Kevin in a coherent conversation, then hanging up the phone as he parked his car on the roadside. With quick movements, he left his car and headed straight into the bar, reaching for his wallet to announce his legal age.
It was his first time in a bar, and definitely a first in a gay bar too, since he wasn’t the kind to socialise over alcohol and deafening music. There wasn’t any other glaring difference from mainstream bar than the number of men, though Kibum would not be the best person to consult due to the fact he had only seen this one. There were a few girls too, usually in pairs, randomly situated around the bar.
The information he got from the higher-ups at the brothel was that this gay bar could not proclaim itself when advertising due to the conservative nature of Korea, and he was hence not allowed to go around spreading the word either to anyone. Not that he knew anyone who was gay and needed a bar to pick up someone of the same sex.
Taking in the setting within five seconds, Kibum then looked around for the only familiar face in this foreign location. Kevin was drunk, which meant he could not be standing without causing chaos. The psychology student then searched for the various areas with seats, hoping to identify Kevin by his hair or at least the outfit he had seen this afternoon.
“Kevin!” Kibum called, spotting the younger male with his upper body sprawled across the bar top, unable to hear his call. With Kevin’s located, the older male then walked in that direction.
“Hey, are you interested in chatting?” A man approached Kibum with a coquettish smile, hands reaching for Kibum’s. “It won’t take too long….”
“Sorry.” Kibum shook his head, politely excusing himself as he headed straight for Kevin. “Kevin?”
“Kibummie!” Kevin suddenly sat up straight, brightly welcoming the newcomer. “Hello~!”
“Kevin, where is he?”
The older man looked around for any man that looked like he had bought Kevin’s services, but everyone around them was pretty much minding their own business after seeing a beautiful male like Kevin having company.
“Gone...” The escort giggled, red cheeks evident due to the excessive alcohol intake, though surprisingly able to understand Kibum’s question. Kevin then wrapped his arms loosely about Kibum’s neck, lowering his eyelids as he smiled giddily at the other. “Do you want some fun?”
“How much did he feed you?” Kibum sighed, able to smell the strong smell of alcohol in Kevin’s breath.
“A lot, he told me they were expensive.” The escort mumbled, words growing less coherent in his drunken state. “He said I could try all I wanted, and so I did…”
Without any concern for Kibum’s reply, the drunken male dragged Kibum towards the dance floor, his path going in a zigzag pattern. Kibum kept the younger from falling, finally reaching the dance floor where the younger completely leaned his entire weight on the older.
Because it felt like he could give himself, his entire self, to Kibum. And it didn’t matter at all, because it was Kibum.
This, was the feeling he was aching for all day. Familiar hands that knew exactly where to hold him, with no intentions of squeezing any part of him and making it hurt due to his lack of excess flesh. A comfortable and fresh scent, indicating their proximity and the other’s age while soothing him. The warm body radiating, acting as a source of heat to fight the cold in the bar.
Kevin could so literally melt in those arms, and he giggled thinking of how it sounded so funny in his head.
The booming music that kept going on in the club should disturb Kibum, but if it did, it didn’t show on his face. Seemingly adjusted to the setting, he easily supported the escort and tried to keep up with a haphazard dance Kevin was trying to get him to dance along to. A few couples around them then made space for them on the dance floor, some looking distastefully at Kevin’s drunken behaviour, some admiring the superior features of the two.
“Sorry.” Kibum courteously apologised, still trying to restrain Kevin as much as he could. He shot them a quick smile and regarded them for a second, and it was enough to wash their annoyance away. A few men shook their head as if to say they didn’t mind in reply, because what else could you do when someone speaks to you so sincerely?
It was only a few minutes later when Kevin thankfully stopped staggering around so much, instead circling his arms around the older man. He shifted his weight from one leg to another and back, as if doing a slow dance in a ballroom, easily causing Kibum to follow his rhythm.
“Have your mind cleared?” Kibum asked gently.
Kevin giggled a bit at the question, stopping his slow movements with the other following suit. The beautiful man suddenly had a cheeky smirk stretched across his face, fingers dancing from around Kibum’s neck to against his chest. Kevin then looked up into those eyes, smiling, and almost unnoticeably started grinding against the man before him.
Kibum pressed his lips together, looking away while finding Kevin’s hips with his hands blindly. He tried controlling the younger’s movements, feeling only Kevin crashing both their hips together once more. With a gentle push against his head from the drunken man before him, Kibum found himself staring at Kevin once more.
“Hm?” Kevin hummed, which could easily be missed on the noisy dance floor.
Except that their proximity didn’t allow for that to happen.
“This isn’t appropriate.” The older man continued resisting, and Kevin, like a spoilt child who would not listen, kept doing what he wanted to even though he was told otherwise. He grinned, fingers crawling down from Kibum’s chest towards his stomach and then a little more south.
Alarmed, the other man hurriedly grabbed the escort’s hands before he could be groped in public, giving a shaky laugh as if to laugh it off. Kevin then looked cutely at Kibum, almost innocently, shifting to kiss the older man. Within the short moment that Kibum let his guard down, the drunk man reached for the clothed member, barely hearing the restrained moan.
“Kevin-”
Kevin laced his other hand’s fingers in Kibum’s hair, guiding both their tongue deeper into each other’s mouth. He beamed at Kibum’s acute awareness of them being in public, himself paying more attention to the growing erection he was teasing instead. Kevin knew he probably caught at least a good number of people’s attention with his obscene actions, and it was then he realised how great a feeling it was to mark Kibum as his man.
His, and his only. Even if it was only for the night.
“People have sex on the dance floor at times even, don’t be surprised.” Kevin whispered as he latched his lips against Kibum’s ears. He scanned the area and smirked, then slightly turning the older man as if to prove his previously stated point. “There.”
Kevin started giggling loudly when Kibum showed a look of horror, and the driver decided that it would be better for them to leave as soon as possible. Because Kevin was awfully drunk despite his accurate teasing, never mind the throbbing erection in his pants.
-
The escort barely stirred awake, eyes still blurry and mind still incoherent as Kibum carried him out of the car into the latter’s room. He didn’t question why he ended up being at Kibum’s house, only recognising that the person carrying him was the man he loved.
And it seemed like the perfect idea to tell him right then.
“Down…” Kevin mumbled, trying to find his voice before opening his mouth again. “Down….”
Kibum definitely heard Kevin asking to be put down the second time, and although he wasn’t sure if it was a good idea, he did as he was told. They were already in his room, which meant there wasn’t much the younger could do to get into trouble, leading Kibum to considerately lower Kevin for him to slide off easily onto his two feet. As the drunken man tried to get his footing, the other man instinctively caught the escort’s waist as a preventive measure.
Spinning out of the embrace Kibum held him in with all the energy he could muster in his state of mind, Kevin pushed the surprised man towards the door and forced their lips together. The abruptness of the move made the slight impact more painful than it should have been, and Kibum barely had the time to respond to the sudden kiss, being flustered and all.
“I like you.” Kevin whispered as he pulled away, and then returning to kiss Kibum harder. He clutched Kibum’s shirt tightly as he furiously tasted the other’s mouth, pulling the older man towards him as if to close the non-existent gap between them. The words then sunk into Kibum’s mind only a second later, and the older man wondered what he should do with this newfound knowledge.
Kevin liked someone.
He felt the younger’s fingernails dig deeper into his arms, easily deciding Kevin was apprehensive about the reaction he would be getting from the man he liked, and the only reason why Kibum was grabbed was due to the influence of alcohol. Without putting any more thought, he then held Kevin’s head and deepened the kiss, hoping to at least comfort Kevin even if it was only by the slightest amount.
There was then a damp, cool feeling, probably due to the double cooling effect of the dampness and the freezing air conditioner against Kibum’s face, causing him to stop breathless. Pushing Kevin away gingerly, he noticed the tears smeared across the younger’s face, those hooded eyes tinted with redness.
Kevin loved this man before him, but he couldn’t bring himself to tell him the feelings he had were way more intense than the word “like” could carry. It was overwhelming how he could love this man so much, and even more if the man didn’t reciprocate the feeling.
Despite being pushed away only a moment ago, Kevin clung onto Kibum right after, crying hard. The escort’s shoulders were trembling violently, his breath ragged and uneven, and his voice barely audible as he mumbled incoherently into the older man’s comforting chest.
Kibum only watched these signs quietly.
He didn’t get it, he couldn’t, only holding Kevin as tightly as he could. Rocking the younger like he was a child, Kibum then waited for the whimpers to cease, before carrying Kevin and watching sleep take over him.
Pressing his knees against the side of the bed, Kibum bent down and laid Kevin down on his bed lightly, letting the younger fall into slumber much more comfortably. He smiled mildly at Kevin’s sleeping figure, himself sitting by the side of the bed after covering Kevin with his blanket, then placing a soft kiss on the younger’s forehead.
“I wish you liked me too. I wonder who that man is, the man who could make you say those words.”
Kibum raised his hand to gently combed Kevin’s hair while he whispered those words, repeating the action till the younger’s hair was neatly arranged even as he was lying down. The older shifted his hand lower after he was done, cupping the sleeping man’s face softly with fingers that was barely touching skin. Watching the other, Kibum’s face had somehow eased into an expression of aloofness, knowing no one else could see him this way.
Because even though he tried his best to hide it, he was breaking. Because even though it wasn’t like him, he was hurting.
That Kevin could cling onto him so miserably, crying with unending tears, telling him how much another man mattered to him.
It wasn’t the cramped sofa chair Kibum slept in that hurts, but the thought that another man took away the only person he wanted so badly in life. And in the still night, neither of the two could rest easy, not when they didn’t get an answer to their insecure beliefs of the opposite never loving them back.
-
Oh em gee, haha, this is so late, but you guys are probably used to it by now >_<
I'm so sorry, but meh, stress is getting to me. I have like, three exams with increasing difficulty almost consecutively, in like five months.
I'm not talking about three subjects, but three exams, each with all the subjects I'm taking, in different months I guess.
Does it even make sense? No? That's my situation right now. ;~~;
Anyway, I hope this pretty revealing chapter atoned for my sins, at least a bit.
Kevin ~did~ confess afterall! :D
Fandom(s) : U-KISS
Pairing(s): KeMaru
Rating: NC-17
Genre: AU, Romance
Warnings: Awful!English
Author's Notes: My second NaNoWriMo, and a rather bold decision, if I might say :)! Hopefully doesn't contain too much inaccuracies, and if it does, please ignore it? >_>?
Prologue :: Chapter 1 :: Chapter 2 :: Chapter 3 :: Chapter 4 :: Chapter 5 :: Chapter 6 :: Chapter 7
Chapter 8 :: Chapter 9 :: Chapter 10 :: Chapter 11 :: Chapter 12 :: Chapter 13 :: Chapter 14 :: Chapter 15
Chapter 16 :: Chapter 17 :: Chapter 18 :: Chapter 19 :: Chapter 20 :: Chapter 21 :: Chapter 22
Chapter 23 :: Chapter 24 :: Chapter 25 :: Chapter 26 :: Chapter 27 :: Chapter 28 :: Chapter 29
Chapter 30 :: Chapter 31 :: Chapter 32
Kibum folded his arms as a slight sign of impatience, but really, he was just in his most comfortable position. The younger male had taken a bit longer than usual, and upon seeing the older male in his misleading stance, Kevin hurried towards him and apologised with a sweet smile.
“Sorry, I realised I forgot to send a few of my clothes to the laundry, so I had to pick out the clean ones from the mess.” The escort scratched his head sheepishly, while Kibum merely shook his head with a similar smile.
“It’s fine, it’s not as if I have anything better to do than to wait for you.” The older spoke as he led the way towards the car park, footsteps in sync with the other. “Have I seen this outfit before?”
“You tell me.” Kevin cheekily threw the question back, smiling as Kibum thought about the issue for a moment. Did Kibum pay attention enough to realise the outfit was new? He did feel expectant, always believing the other man had an observant nature. On the other hand, he wished he stopped hoping. If Kibum did answer the question correctly, it only made things harder for Kevin.
Harder for him to remind himself that Kibum would never love him.
Kibum paused, looking at the escort from top to toe before shaking his head. “Nope, haven’t seen this before. When did you buy this?”
“You had to go to school for some lecture, and I had some free time, so I thought why not.” Kevin smiled proudly, twirling around despite his nervousness after knowing Kibum did pay attention to him afterall. He then thanked Kibum as the other held the door for him, entering the car with practiced ease.
Kibum headed across the front of the car to his seat, remembering that an influential psychologist held a talk in school three days ago, the only reason he would go back to school for in this tight period. That day had been inspiring, and it had also been the hundred and fortieth day since his project started. Only forty more days to go since then.
"Where to?" Kevin asked as he buckled his seatbelt, a small sound escaping his lips as he blew air out.
"Some gay bar." Kibum vaguely replied while mimicking Kevin’s actions, seemingly having lesser clue than Kevin did. Despite so, he stepped on the engine and drove out of the brothel's car park, bringing Kevin to where he was called for.
-
The harder he felt it was to entertain the customer before him, the scarier it was. The feeling only grew stronger, and it was difficult to keep the forced smile on his face despite his years of training.
There were so many flaws he could point out about the man he was smiling at - his bald head, his bad fashion sense, his wrinkled skin and his bad breath. He used to put up with all these features that depicted the vast age gap between him and his customers, but this tolerance was unconsciously growing thin.
Why?
“Kevin, do you take alcohol well?” The man asked, one hand resting on the curves of the younger man’s. They were both sitting by the bar top, with the older of the two slightly reached over for the younger. Things were the usual, a suggestive stroke down Kevin’s waist, almost perfectly normal. And that self-satisfied smile, with teeth yellow from all the smoking he had done, along with those eyes that probably wished they could tear off Kevin’s clothes just by looking. Kevin experienced all these on a daily basis.
But he felt sick, for the very first time, with nothing to convince him to feel otherwise.
Disgusted at the touch, disgusted at the idea of the two of them together, plainly disgusted. He watched the other and tried to concentrate, nodding in hopes of hiding his voice that could easily be laced with disdain.
“Really? Well, would you like to try it from my mouth?”
Kevin grimaced internally, giving the other a soft poke with his fingers while smiling shyly to complete the act. “I can’t do that…It’s too…embarrassing…”
The man laughed heartily, then pulling Kevin by his waist and landing the younger on his lap. He reached for the younger man’s thighs and squeezed them, laughing once more when he heard a satisfying whine. “Mm, guess we will have to drink separately then.”
Kevin nodded slightly, afraid of himself. Holding the glass of wine placed on the bar top with two hands, he stared at the dark, intense red and watched his reflection from the surface of the glass.
He looked skeptical, lost, and reluctant.
How was he going to last for the hours to come?
-
“Kibummie~!” Kevin giggled into phone, not his usual self.
The said man looked troubled as he received the phone call right after dinner not because of the abrupt timing, but rather the unexpected tone of the caller. He gave it no further thought, reflexes hurrying him back into his car. Starting the engine once more to drive towards the bar he left Kevin at two hours ago, Kibum kept the phone against his ears. “Yes?”
“Kibummie…this place is really loud...” Kevin slurred, and the blaring music in the background proved his point.
“Are you drunk or are you drugged?” Kibum frowned, trying to beat a red light as he continued speeding through the road. Kevin’s reply never came, though there were some distant noises barely audible over the music.
“Don’t touch me…” The escort called weakly, sounding like he was unable to fend off any predators. “I come at a high price….”
“Kevin.” Kibum spoke strictly, calling for the younger. He still couldn’t quite grasp the situation, wary of the possibility that Kevin could be drugged and dragged off. “Kevin!”
“Kibummie…” The younger giggled as he repeated the name cutely, sighing dreamily. “Would you like some wine?”
“You’re drunk.”
Kibum slowed down significantly, as Kevin’s safety was somehow less of a threat and that he was arriving at his destination. He gave up trying to engage Kevin in a coherent conversation, then hanging up the phone as he parked his car on the roadside. With quick movements, he left his car and headed straight into the bar, reaching for his wallet to announce his legal age.
It was his first time in a bar, and definitely a first in a gay bar too, since he wasn’t the kind to socialise over alcohol and deafening music. There wasn’t any other glaring difference from mainstream bar than the number of men, though Kibum would not be the best person to consult due to the fact he had only seen this one. There were a few girls too, usually in pairs, randomly situated around the bar.
The information he got from the higher-ups at the brothel was that this gay bar could not proclaim itself when advertising due to the conservative nature of Korea, and he was hence not allowed to go around spreading the word either to anyone. Not that he knew anyone who was gay and needed a bar to pick up someone of the same sex.
Taking in the setting within five seconds, Kibum then looked around for the only familiar face in this foreign location. Kevin was drunk, which meant he could not be standing without causing chaos. The psychology student then searched for the various areas with seats, hoping to identify Kevin by his hair or at least the outfit he had seen this afternoon.
“Kevin!” Kibum called, spotting the younger male with his upper body sprawled across the bar top, unable to hear his call. With Kevin’s located, the older male then walked in that direction.
“Hey, are you interested in chatting?” A man approached Kibum with a coquettish smile, hands reaching for Kibum’s. “It won’t take too long….”
“Sorry.” Kibum shook his head, politely excusing himself as he headed straight for Kevin. “Kevin?”
“Kibummie!” Kevin suddenly sat up straight, brightly welcoming the newcomer. “Hello~!”
“Kevin, where is he?”
The older man looked around for any man that looked like he had bought Kevin’s services, but everyone around them was pretty much minding their own business after seeing a beautiful male like Kevin having company.
“Gone...” The escort giggled, red cheeks evident due to the excessive alcohol intake, though surprisingly able to understand Kibum’s question. Kevin then wrapped his arms loosely about Kibum’s neck, lowering his eyelids as he smiled giddily at the other. “Do you want some fun?”
“How much did he feed you?” Kibum sighed, able to smell the strong smell of alcohol in Kevin’s breath.
“A lot, he told me they were expensive.” The escort mumbled, words growing less coherent in his drunken state. “He said I could try all I wanted, and so I did…”
Without any concern for Kibum’s reply, the drunken male dragged Kibum towards the dance floor, his path going in a zigzag pattern. Kibum kept the younger from falling, finally reaching the dance floor where the younger completely leaned his entire weight on the older.
Because it felt like he could give himself, his entire self, to Kibum. And it didn’t matter at all, because it was Kibum.
This, was the feeling he was aching for all day. Familiar hands that knew exactly where to hold him, with no intentions of squeezing any part of him and making it hurt due to his lack of excess flesh. A comfortable and fresh scent, indicating their proximity and the other’s age while soothing him. The warm body radiating, acting as a source of heat to fight the cold in the bar.
Kevin could so literally melt in those arms, and he giggled thinking of how it sounded so funny in his head.
The booming music that kept going on in the club should disturb Kibum, but if it did, it didn’t show on his face. Seemingly adjusted to the setting, he easily supported the escort and tried to keep up with a haphazard dance Kevin was trying to get him to dance along to. A few couples around them then made space for them on the dance floor, some looking distastefully at Kevin’s drunken behaviour, some admiring the superior features of the two.
“Sorry.” Kibum courteously apologised, still trying to restrain Kevin as much as he could. He shot them a quick smile and regarded them for a second, and it was enough to wash their annoyance away. A few men shook their head as if to say they didn’t mind in reply, because what else could you do when someone speaks to you so sincerely?
It was only a few minutes later when Kevin thankfully stopped staggering around so much, instead circling his arms around the older man. He shifted his weight from one leg to another and back, as if doing a slow dance in a ballroom, easily causing Kibum to follow his rhythm.
“Have your mind cleared?” Kibum asked gently.
Kevin giggled a bit at the question, stopping his slow movements with the other following suit. The beautiful man suddenly had a cheeky smirk stretched across his face, fingers dancing from around Kibum’s neck to against his chest. Kevin then looked up into those eyes, smiling, and almost unnoticeably started grinding against the man before him.
Kibum pressed his lips together, looking away while finding Kevin’s hips with his hands blindly. He tried controlling the younger’s movements, feeling only Kevin crashing both their hips together once more. With a gentle push against his head from the drunken man before him, Kibum found himself staring at Kevin once more.
“Hm?” Kevin hummed, which could easily be missed on the noisy dance floor.
Except that their proximity didn’t allow for that to happen.
“This isn’t appropriate.” The older man continued resisting, and Kevin, like a spoilt child who would not listen, kept doing what he wanted to even though he was told otherwise. He grinned, fingers crawling down from Kibum’s chest towards his stomach and then a little more south.
Alarmed, the other man hurriedly grabbed the escort’s hands before he could be groped in public, giving a shaky laugh as if to laugh it off. Kevin then looked cutely at Kibum, almost innocently, shifting to kiss the older man. Within the short moment that Kibum let his guard down, the drunk man reached for the clothed member, barely hearing the restrained moan.
“Kevin-”
Kevin laced his other hand’s fingers in Kibum’s hair, guiding both their tongue deeper into each other’s mouth. He beamed at Kibum’s acute awareness of them being in public, himself paying more attention to the growing erection he was teasing instead. Kevin knew he probably caught at least a good number of people’s attention with his obscene actions, and it was then he realised how great a feeling it was to mark Kibum as his man.
His, and his only. Even if it was only for the night.
“People have sex on the dance floor at times even, don’t be surprised.” Kevin whispered as he latched his lips against Kibum’s ears. He scanned the area and smirked, then slightly turning the older man as if to prove his previously stated point. “There.”
Kevin started giggling loudly when Kibum showed a look of horror, and the driver decided that it would be better for them to leave as soon as possible. Because Kevin was awfully drunk despite his accurate teasing, never mind the throbbing erection in his pants.
-
The escort barely stirred awake, eyes still blurry and mind still incoherent as Kibum carried him out of the car into the latter’s room. He didn’t question why he ended up being at Kibum’s house, only recognising that the person carrying him was the man he loved.
And it seemed like the perfect idea to tell him right then.
“Down…” Kevin mumbled, trying to find his voice before opening his mouth again. “Down….”
Kibum definitely heard Kevin asking to be put down the second time, and although he wasn’t sure if it was a good idea, he did as he was told. They were already in his room, which meant there wasn’t much the younger could do to get into trouble, leading Kibum to considerately lower Kevin for him to slide off easily onto his two feet. As the drunken man tried to get his footing, the other man instinctively caught the escort’s waist as a preventive measure.
Spinning out of the embrace Kibum held him in with all the energy he could muster in his state of mind, Kevin pushed the surprised man towards the door and forced their lips together. The abruptness of the move made the slight impact more painful than it should have been, and Kibum barely had the time to respond to the sudden kiss, being flustered and all.
“I like you.” Kevin whispered as he pulled away, and then returning to kiss Kibum harder. He clutched Kibum’s shirt tightly as he furiously tasted the other’s mouth, pulling the older man towards him as if to close the non-existent gap between them. The words then sunk into Kibum’s mind only a second later, and the older man wondered what he should do with this newfound knowledge.
Kevin liked someone.
He felt the younger’s fingernails dig deeper into his arms, easily deciding Kevin was apprehensive about the reaction he would be getting from the man he liked, and the only reason why Kibum was grabbed was due to the influence of alcohol. Without putting any more thought, he then held Kevin’s head and deepened the kiss, hoping to at least comfort Kevin even if it was only by the slightest amount.
There was then a damp, cool feeling, probably due to the double cooling effect of the dampness and the freezing air conditioner against Kibum’s face, causing him to stop breathless. Pushing Kevin away gingerly, he noticed the tears smeared across the younger’s face, those hooded eyes tinted with redness.
Kevin loved this man before him, but he couldn’t bring himself to tell him the feelings he had were way more intense than the word “like” could carry. It was overwhelming how he could love this man so much, and even more if the man didn’t reciprocate the feeling.
Despite being pushed away only a moment ago, Kevin clung onto Kibum right after, crying hard. The escort’s shoulders were trembling violently, his breath ragged and uneven, and his voice barely audible as he mumbled incoherently into the older man’s comforting chest.
Kibum only watched these signs quietly.
He didn’t get it, he couldn’t, only holding Kevin as tightly as he could. Rocking the younger like he was a child, Kibum then waited for the whimpers to cease, before carrying Kevin and watching sleep take over him.
Pressing his knees against the side of the bed, Kibum bent down and laid Kevin down on his bed lightly, letting the younger fall into slumber much more comfortably. He smiled mildly at Kevin’s sleeping figure, himself sitting by the side of the bed after covering Kevin with his blanket, then placing a soft kiss on the younger’s forehead.
“I wish you liked me too. I wonder who that man is, the man who could make you say those words.”
Kibum raised his hand to gently combed Kevin’s hair while he whispered those words, repeating the action till the younger’s hair was neatly arranged even as he was lying down. The older shifted his hand lower after he was done, cupping the sleeping man’s face softly with fingers that was barely touching skin. Watching the other, Kibum’s face had somehow eased into an expression of aloofness, knowing no one else could see him this way.
Because even though he tried his best to hide it, he was breaking. Because even though it wasn’t like him, he was hurting.
That Kevin could cling onto him so miserably, crying with unending tears, telling him how much another man mattered to him.
It wasn’t the cramped sofa chair Kibum slept in that hurts, but the thought that another man took away the only person he wanted so badly in life. And in the still night, neither of the two could rest easy, not when they didn’t get an answer to their insecure beliefs of the opposite never loving them back.
-
Oh em gee, haha, this is so late, but you guys are probably used to it by now >_<
I'm so sorry, but meh, stress is getting to me. I have like, three exams with increasing difficulty almost consecutively, in like five months.
I'm not talking about three subjects, but three exams, each with all the subjects I'm taking, in different months I guess.
Does it even make sense? No? That's my situation right now. ;~~;
Anyway, I hope this pretty revealing chapter atoned for my sins, at least a bit.
Kevin ~did~ confess afterall! :D