Youth for thesiriusmoon (Welcome to March)

[duck_or_rabbit]

Title: Youth
Author: duck_or_rabbit
Challenge: er, March 2009 for thesiriusmoon
Rating: PG13
Word count: ~ 1000
Warnings: Something like infidelity. Depends on what you believe.
Summary: And he now being thirty-five, no longer nineteen, was almost a relief to Remus.
Disclaimer: Characters are the property of JK Rowling and associates.
Key words and dialogue: rabbit (!),

Comments

[remuslives23]

Spank me but I do quite enjoy fics where Remus is the one who is thinking of getting some love elsewhere. :) But I love it even more when he changes his mind for Sirius. Add the post POA era and the fact you wrote it, and you have quite a few of my favourite things here. :) Lovely!

[duck_or_rabbit]

You know, I rather agree with you. Well, with the bits about Remus, that is. The other stuff just makes me feel flattered.

Thank you for reading, it means a lot, :D. ::hugs::

[deathjunke]

*SPANK SPANK SPANK*

>.> well you told me too

[remuslives23]

Oooh, HARDER!

Oops, my kinks are showing!

[hrymfaxe]

Oh I really really like this... The difference between Remus' expansive internal observations/memories and the sparse dialogue is wonderful.

There is a richness of backstory to this short piece that is very fascinating, and immediately clues me in to how Remus has lived before and how they are now. It is all transitory - Sirius not having any belongings in the house, any traces of other men being easy to clear away or hide, Remus' nightly stands (or kneels! I appreciated that one a lot! ;))..

My heart breaks a little for Sirius' enthousiasm for the insignificant task they have assigned him. And how he is also (wilfully?) ignorant of what Remus is up to. It's like he is a little naive, and unused to human company, which makes perfect sense with regards to all those years he lost.

I also really like how Remus cannot really wrap his mind around Sirius. And these two lines tells a little of why it is so hard:
"Time and age revealing he wasn't a inscrutable transcendent force

[duck_or_rabbit]

I'm always astounded at the wonderful things you say. You know, one could get too used to that, yet I like being made comfortable, so stick around.

The difference between Remus' expansive internal observations/memories and the sparse dialogue is wonderful.

Oh! Thank you. A 'This Is An Experimentation In Form' statement almost made it into the A/N, but now I've said it down here in the comments and I don't need to say it up there; thanks for noticing it and pointing it out. People's consciousness take such different shapes (I presume, I've only mine) that I wanted to try out what it could be like for Remus to be both talking to himself and someone else simultaneously.

It's like he is a little naive, and unused to human company, which makes perfect sense with regards to all those years he lost.

One element purposely attempted here is that Remus perceives Sirius as really trying. In OotP, Sirius seems biblically angry, and he ought to be, yet I wanted this to be a prelude to that in which the anger isn't as acute

[accioamber]

Every single line of this story had depth. It was really incredible and really, really wonderful.

[duck_or_rabbit]

This is such a lovely comment because Remus and Sirius are attempting to communicate any way that they can, so mentioning there's meaning here is just perfect. Gosh, thanks, :D.

[werewolfsfan]

I really appreciate the way you present Remus as a 35 year old MAN. Sirius is sort of a different case. Between his natural personality and the 12 years in prison, he has arrested development in some areas. I've never thought that they could fall back into a relationship without outstanding issues and current problems.

But what I like the most is this:

Remus clutched tighter and tighter at this kiss, instinctively reaching out like he was being thrown a rope to catch because without it, where in Merlin’s name would he be?

[duck_or_rabbit]

Sirius is definitely a man out of his time, you're absolutely right. Contrasting him against Remus as friend, lover, colleague (like you, I go in for all three) can show both their individual attributes very excitingly. Their dynamic in Rowling's OotP leaves an indelible mark on so many of us, principally for that big observation you make, which is, what are their outstanding issues? Fandom's contribution to their lost moments will never outwear their welcome. I'm pleased something resonated here.

Thank you so much for liking the line you do. Certain people, nngg, they shape us forever, and Sirius is such a person to Remus.

Your comments are always insightful, thank you for reading. x

[yndigot]

Oh... I adore Remus wanting or expecting things Sirius wasn't ready to give, and then accepting that there would be dishonesty in their renewed relationship and just grabbing hold of it anyway... So painful, but in such a good way. And I love the way Remus's casual encounters seem to be chasing young, beautiful Sirius -- always younger, 22 years old, youths... Trying to recreate something that's time has passed. *sigh*

[duck_or_rabbit]

And I love the way Remus's casual encounters seem to be chasing young, beautiful Sirius -- always younger, 22 years old, youths.

♥! &hearts! ♥!

Did I mention ♥!?

YES, that's it exactly! And you know, you said it precisely like I wanted it said without me having to say it, of course. All those bread crumbs about YoungSirius!Apollo and his black hair in the sun for Remus, which then lead to new golden twenty two year olds for Remus to revel in after loosing Sirius at (roughly) that same age. Remus here has moved on, but is not completely able to get past an era that had passed.

I'm so, so glad to have your observations because I was cynical towards myself throughout today, believing that I hadn't written this how I'd intended! Thank you ever so. And I'm glad it's painful, but in a good way, 'cause I think Remus and Sirius are going to be OK, at least for a while.

So, to summarize: ♥!

[yndigot]

!! *love*

I read it once and I didn't have time to comment, so I came back later and re-read and the 'Remus chasing young!Sirius' thing just JUMPED out at me on the second read-through. It's definitely there and done well. ^_^

[duck_or_rabbit]

Oh, gosh, well, thank you again. And for your considerate reading and feedback, taking time from your day for a re-read.

Having those moments when someone invades your brain . . . well, they just feel nice, :D.