it's official, i'm damaged goods

[roflolmaomg]

 haha whoops, i accidentally wrote a fic about how CPine lost his virginity on his grandmother's smelly old couch and for some reason he wanted to wear a suit that reminded him of it so uh anyway.

i guess my warnings are for severe second hand embarrassment and heterosexual sex (I KNOW, RIGHT, IT'S NEVER BEEN DONE) and i'm so sorry, this is exactly

Comments

[sail_aweigh]

I love the way the girl's name kept changing with every iteration. Poor Chris, but it's true that very few first times are really worth remembering.

[roflolmaomg]

what that's it

[roflolmaomg]

nope just checking

and here is my accidental comment

[karmic_fic]

Chris is standing in front of the closet mirror looking between the two suits that his handlers have sent over, one black and one navy, unable to decide when his phone chirps

Re: and here is my accidental comment

[ninfomana]

Haaaaaaaaaaahhahahaa.

[sequinedfairy]

the worst part is i bet this is exactly how it happened.

christopher whitelaw pine, look at your life. look at your choices.

[ninfomana]

you've got a condom, right? 'cause if I get pregnant I can't be at the top of the pyramid and I don't even like babies, they poop themselves and can't talk for like two years.
Best. Reasning. Ever. At least she's honest.

Chris attempted a laugh, shaky and paper thin as the nightgown Grandma insisted on wearing.
akjdfzshkdjghzsdlgkdfsgsdMENTALIMAGEBRAINMELTED

Chris stuck a finger in his mouth, brow furrowed.
Who does that? Really. Who? You wait til they leeeeeave.

I don't evennnn. Oh, I adore you.