PLEASE help. Please.

[riles298]

Part of me completely hates this essay. Is it shit, or am I crazy?

Comments

[lilliesinaglass]

i laughed my ass of with the first one because it's highly amusing and very well written. the second one is good but cliche but you can't really make it not cliche, but it is good. i actually find the last sentence barfy of that one haha, but it's good. i love the 3rd one. i don't think anything needs to change. you compliment their programme and talk about yourself as well and i really like it. sorry i can't be more of a help though. great work, kid!

[zipzipbong]

The first essay is interesting and cute but doesn't let the admissions people know what perspectives you have to offer to the rest of the students should you attend their school.

I love the second one--it really shows how talented you are with words especially in such a concise space; every word holds my attention and every idea is very lucid.

For the third, I was confused as to why you loved reading and writing and so jumped to "editing"--could you maybe explain that you want to read and think about books (and their function in society?) for a living?

hope that helps : ) I'm so jealous of how prettily you write T_T

[riles298]

The first one they said to "have fun with," and I think it's more to prove the strength of our writing.

Your point on the third one is excellent, I hadn't even thought of that.

[noon30]

When I applied to Emerson last year, I had something similar to your first Short Answer, cheeky I would say. I never fully completed my application (because I was overseas and could not get my letter of recommendation) but I did contact them and they had said that my essay and short answers were excellent, and that I would have been accepted had my application been complete.

So I guess what I'm saying is that your first SA is great.

[riles298]

By the first one, do you mean the life story one?

[noon30]

Correct. In fact, I think that I had the same prompt.