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[retinadarling]

for the second time in my neighborhood in a week, i have been followed for several crowded blocks by a pudgy thug who upon catching up to me asks first if i've seen [insert generic name here], who is supposed to get him That Bag, then if i know where he can get A Bag, promising he will Hook Me Up with a share of the contents if i can provide some

Comments

[james_rhodes]

I'd be worried if I were you.

Carrying bags of powered sugar is a bad idea, since you can be arrested for it as if it were actually a drug if you pass it off to say, an undercover cop posing as a stupid pudgy thug.

[retinadarling]

yeah i wasn't actually planning on selling powdered sugar to pudgy thughives. fuckers could search my bag at any point they wanted to & they would find nothing more incriminating than a [literally, to anyone but myself] incoherent notebook. i feel like there has to be someone who looks like me going around doing this shit now.

[james_rhodes]

Of course it could be something mildly innocuous as well. Perhaps he thinks you look like a girl who MUST know where to get drugs and he has no connections, so he keeps asking you to score for him.

Or he may be trying out his new creative pickup line: 1) Look for a girl that looks like she might be a cokehead. 2) Make up a BS story, and entice her out on a "date" with promises of drugs, merrymaking and fun. Who knows, maybe that works for him?

[retinadarling]

see that's what i thought with the first guy. but two of them in a week? with like near-identical stories? either this is supposed to end up as an unspeakably horrible reality series or--wait. i must have signed up to audition for "america's next top hustler," then forgotten about it.

[agraphia]

paint me paranoid but you're probably being set-up.

[retinadarling]

that's why i think it's extremely weird. they're like three years too late & in the wrong neighborhood if they wanted to set me up. this is totally out of nowhere.

they underestimate you. keep those eyes in the back of yr head peeled

[agraphia]

JACK DANIELS SAYS HI

'SUP JACK

[retinadarling]

i am going to have this stuck in my head all day, thanks
['especially if you're young & black & gay! (black & gaaa-aaay)']