Global Legacy 1.0
Hello! I'm taking time out from my Uberhood (which you can read about here if you want) and Monaco's dress (because I bloody hate recolouring) to do a legacy. I also posted a couple more challenges here, if you want something fun to do today! And so I've created a new, empty game (which I then accidentally filled with EAxis Bluewater Village premades), a new batch of nations (when I was townifying them, I actually had too many nations to fit onto one lot!) and I have chosen one to be my lucky founder. And that lucky nation is Greece. Why? Well, Greece is having a few money problems right now. I can't do much about the real Greek economy, at least, not until I get my passport, visit my mum over there and buy my own body weight in ouzo, but making virtual sim Greece go for dirt poor to stinkin' rich should be pretty fun, right?
Oh, and I also decided I was going to do a mini-challenge every week! They look like fun and I've been waiting for an opportunity to do them. So, roll one.
Awww, come ON! Nobody's gonna believe I got that first time! I'm still having trouble believing it myself! OK, I'll roll again.
Greece's house so far is a single section of wall with a toilet attached. Doing this challenge would accomplish absolutely nothing. NEXT.
OK, I tried this one, I really did. Eyes shut, dragged the tool all over the place and then opened them to see the world's smallest pothole. Turns out the terrain tools cost money. And Greece has a grand total of $5. NEXT!
Oh phew, finally, one I can do. Thank you Gussy Up plugin that allows me to get clothes for free.
So, let's meet our charming founder. The usual legacy rules say to move your founder into the biggest empty lot available. I don't remember it saying it couldn't be a beach lot, so it is.
Greece: Hmm. Not bad for a first attempt.
So while he's busy building a million crappy sandcastles, let's take a look at his lifetime OH FUCK NO. Greece, WHYYYYYY!
Greece: Dating's fun!
You couldn't have the 50 first dates one? Then I just have to call the matchmaker over every day for a bunch of dollar dates that end in two minutes.
Greece: Um, no thanks. I want the very best dates in the world!
YOU COULD HAVE ETERNAL HAPPINESS IN TWO WEEKS! ARGH! Still, I suppose once we find him a spouse, he can have the 50 dates with them.
Anyway, thanks to Mr Humble's free PC delivery, Greece almost has an entire room! Not bad for his first day. It's probably a good thing he can't afford that last bit of wall because he also can't afford any doors right now, but we'll get there. Just as soon as he gets a job.
Of course, the moment he starts walking to work, the local nations start strolling by.
Greece: Hey, look what I got at work today!
Greece can't sit around on the beach all day, waiting for hot people to walk by, so I send him to the karaoke bar. As you can see, Germania had the same idea.
Germania: Mmm, yup, I'm still gorgeous.
Lots of nations here tonight. Maybe one of them can be Greece's future spouse?
Greece: Ew, barf, bunch of uggos.
Not pictured - Greece dry-heaving all over the place. Well, at least he can be friends with them.
Then he wanted to sing, so I let him, despite the fact that he has zero creative points and sounds like he's in horrible pain.
The bartender was impressed though.
So with about $50 to his name, want does he want to do, more than anything else? Buy booze.
ALCOHOL IS NOT A CUISINE ACTIVITY. I'm lying, it totally is. I dunno about you but I do my best drinking with food.
The only other thing he wanted to do was play cards, but he couldn't because he couldn't afford to place a bet, so I sent him to the Crypt O Night club to dance the rest of the night away. Oooh, and look at all these nations! Surely one of them will dance with Greece, right?
Greece: Heeeey gurl, wanna dance?
Italy: Uh, no. Go away.
OK, the club was a bust too, but at least he got some sexy photobooth pics with his last $10!
Back home, we spy Germany walking past. I figure at this point, the easiest way to assess potential date/spouse material is to flat out ask if they like what they see. So.
Greece: Hiya, so, on a scale on one to ten, with ten being 'phwoar', just how much of a sexy beast am I?
Germany: I don't do stubble. Too... French.
Darn, this isn't going so well after all. Nobody likes Greece and he spent all his cash on booze and goofy photos. So I command him to comb the beach for stuff to sell.
Can I sell it? No? Then I don't care.
Greece: I give up. I'm going to bed.
Next day, I make him get up bright and early and do the crossword in the paper. He needs a logic point for promotion and of course, he can't afford a telescope. He could barely afford that last section of wall and a door to go in it.
And here is his first new outfit.
Greece: Dashing!
Rome showed up to steal his paper. I hope it annoys him when he turns to the crossword and finds it's already done.
What? You don't even HAVE a dog. You don't even want a dog at all.
Greece: I've changed my mind. Now I want a sofa.
OK, here's a sofa. Now how about learning some cookery? That always comes in handy.
Greece: Hah, fuck off.
So I let him fill his stupid sunbathing want and try again, but he STILL pretty much told me to go fuck myself. His social and fun are pretty low... so I guess I should make a start on that LTW!
HAHA! OK, I dunno how many other people will be amused by this name, but there's a series of books by Enid Blyton where one of the characters has a parrot called Kiki, who is occasionally called Kiki bird. So reading that sent me right back to my childhood, with Jack joining the circus with Kiki to try and find his friends after they were all kidnapped along with the prince who was staying with them for the summer... ahhh, I want to find them and reread them now.
She even has appropriate parrot-green skin! I love this matchmaker already! Of course, the moment she turns up, Hungary appears on the other side of the lot. DAMMIT. Ah well.
Greece: How many babes can I get for a dollar?
Kiki Bird: Are you serious? NONE. NOT A SINGLE ONE.
Aww hey now, Melody Tinker's a babe! She doesn't think Greece is one though.
Melody: Can you believe I got dumped out of the sky to date THIS fuggo?
Hungary: LOL, I know, right?
Greece: Uh, I'm right here.
Greece: Well OK, you think I'm ugly, but I'm real good at tickles!
Melody: Yeah, no, touch me and I'll kill you.
What? WHAT? You liar, Melody, YOU LIAR! (Also I only just this second noticed that it thinks she's a toddler. WTF game!?)
Unsurprisingly, the date was a complete bust.
Greece: All I want is a dream date or fifty, is that so wrong?
And to make things worse, he was (not) fired from his job and just demoted to level 1... which is pretty redundant seeing as he was already ON level 1.
Greece: Well screw them, I hate that job anyway! I'm just not gonna go tomorrow. Or I'll quit! Wait, I know, I'll do both! That'll teach them to question my methods.
South Italy: Heh heh heh! I'll steal the paper, that'll teach the creator to mess up my hair!
Greece: Go ahead, see if I care.
South Italy: *flees*
But Greece, you should care, that newspaper is pretty much your only hope of fun in this place.
Greece: Wait, what?
You can read it, do the crossword, make a paper plane... the possibilities are endless.
Greece: Wait, WAIT, GIVE IT BAAAAAAAAACK!
And after I fixed your hair too! How very dare you, South Italy.
His fun was totally in the toilet at this point and he'd stop and whine every three seconds about it, so I had a look through the community lot descriptions and decided to send him to the Lulu Lounge, where the fun never stops. He decided the best way to do that was to lay down some fresh beats.
Greece: Yo yo listen up! I live in a shack, it's tough to get by, I ain't got money but DAMN am I fly.
Greece: Pocket lint and a chewed up piece of gum? You people suck.
You think so? Well why don't you go and talk to him?
Greece: Because FUCK YOU, that's why.
Greece: Hey, remember when you said the fun never stopped here? You were wrong.
So as I can't trust Greece to do anything on his own, I command him to go and actually talk to Italy.
Greece: I'm bored, entertain me.
Italy: Bored? Well, why don't you try out this MOTHERFUCKING FLAT SCREEN TV.
EEEE! Italy, you diamond!
Greece: WOO! Celebration barrel roll!
How's the fun now? Better?
Greece: HELL NO I JUST WANNA GO HOME AND TRY OUT MY TV WHINE WHINE MOAN MOAN.
As soon as he got back home from Downtown, this girl called and asked if he wanted to go back. Lol, no. We came home for a reason.
And then Kiki Bird called him. I think she can tell he's going to be requesting her services a lot in the future.
He didn't actually have time to watch TV before sleeping, which meant he woke up with nightmares all through the night, poor guy.
But early next morning, the fun bar was filled and the TV was instantly sold to build this cute little seaside home! Sure, it has no wallpaper and the roof is revolting because I intend to build a second floor ASAP, but it's an actual house!
And as it's a new day, it's time to change into outfit number two!
Greece: DROP IT.
France: Jeez, I was just reading the headlines, that's all.
Greece: Hmm. Seven across, five letters, the - mightier than the sword?
Ooh, ooh, I know! Penis... aw, hey!
Greece still didn't want to go to work today, so I said 'fuck it' and let him stay at home.
Greece: I HAVE NO-ONE TO TALK TO WAH!
Hey, you're the one who decided to forgo the witty banter of your co-workers today. But hang on, someone's passing by, why don't you go and say hello?
Greece: Ew, he's ugly.
Hey, I'm not asking you to date him (yet), just talk to him while you wait for the matchmaker to hook you up with someone better.
Kiki Bird: What the hell is this?
Greece: Every penny I own. I expect triple bolts for this.
Kiki Bird: You didn't even give me triple digits!
Greece: ...No. Just... no.
He was equally unimpressed.
England: Lol, that's your date? You could've had me for free.
Greece: What's wrong? I'm sexy, I have my own beach, I like kittens-
Date: Brown hair is fugly.
Yeah, well, so's your face. Hmph.
DREAM DATE TALLY SO FAR: 0/50.
Greece has no money left to bribe Kiki Bird any more, but no worries! Who needs a matchmaker when nations come strolling past your front door, right?
Britannia: Oh MY, what an absolute sexpot!
England: Is he looking at me? Is he looking at me? Oh my God, he's looking at me, isn't he? OK, England, stay calm. You've got this.
England: Backrub?
Britannia: Can I upgrade to a full body rub? ♥
Aww come on! How come nobody wants rub Greece?
America: It's the face-fur. Sorry. Stubble gives me a rash.
Ah well. New day, new outfit!
Greece: I don't like it, it itches.
It's just for one day. Get over it.
Even though Greece decided he still didn't want to go to work today, I ordered him to do the crossword anyway. Might as well have that logic point all ready for promotion. Only Denmark thwarted my plan by stealing the paper before Greece could get it.
Sooo... you just gonna lounge there all day?
Greece: You got a problem with that?
He got bored and lounged on the beach all day instead.
There, you missed work AGAIN. Are you ready to go back yet? Because you kinda need the cash.
Greece: Lol no.
I made him beachcomb instead. It gets pretty good money, but it's not without its dangers.
Greece: My poor fingers!
Oh, and Kiki Bird still phones every night, probably to see if he wants to buy another date yet.
Greece: I can't right now, things are a bit hectic at work. Yup, I'm working hard. Hard at work.
Really he's just sparing her feelings because he's getting his own date for free.
So how did it oh excuse me, sorry.
DREAM DATES: 1/50 HURRAH!
New day, new outfit! Buoyed by his success with Italy, Greece sprints out to see if Japan would like to help him out of his armour. I mean, Greece and Japan, that would be awesome, right?
Japan: Nope.
Greece: But I thought you liked mecha cosplay stuff.
Japan: I SAID NOPE.
Greece: Right, that's it, I need to magic some love up here.
Two problems: you have no money and YOU STILL DON'T WANT TO GO TO WORK.
At least Japan will stick around and help him play in the sand and maybe oil him if the sea makes him go rusty.
I also make him comb the beach some more.
Greece: Hah, I came prepared today.
Later Britannia cold calls him. I was totally expecting it to be Kiki Bird when the phone rang, so that was a pleasant surprise.
Oooh, nice choice of company, Britannia.
Greece: Except that guy. He's gross.
Nice going, Greece, you sank your own ship twice in one day.
WHAT!? EVERYONE ELSE IS GETTING ACTION EXCEPT GREECE!?
Greece: I see someone I like.
What, him? Really?
Japan: ~I'm loving angels instead~
Ukraine: Excuse me, where's MY Robbie Williams serenade?
Japan: How about a kiss instead?
Britannia: Er, excuse me!?
NyoJapan: Well if he's busy, can I cut in, pretty lady?
Japan: How could you do this to me!? We're through!
OK, I totally have to marry a Japan sim into the household at some point, I have a feeling they will bring me great lulz and drama.
On the downside, their little domestic spat completely destroyed the outing rating. THANKS GUYS!
Whaaaat? Why are you blaming Greece? He didn't do anything!
Greece: Y'know what? I really fancy a burger right now.
Well why don't you eat that one right in front of you?
Greece: Ew, no! Someone could've sneezed on that or something!
I did actually try and command him to eat the burger, but he wasn't having any of it.
One problem: Greece cannot afford the burger.
Greece: Of course I can pay for this! What kind of waster do you think I am!?
Good luck eating that. What are you gonna do, smash your face into it and hope some of it goes through the holes?
Greece: Shut up.
He was still hungry, so I decided fuck it. If we're gonna steal food, might as well steal lots. There was a pop-up when he strolled off the lot, but I was too slow to cap it. :(
New day! New outfit!
Greece: Seriously?
Oh yes. >:D
Greece: I hate you.
You haven't even seen tomorrow's outfit, ho ho ho.
He switched out of the monkey suit to go beach combing, but the hat stayed on.
Greece: Well yeah, I can't go digging in the sand with those giant paws.
Greece: ARRRRRGH GETITOFFGETITOFF!
Crab: Bet you wish you'd kept the giant monkey paws now, mwahahaha!
Oh hello there, natural triple bolter. I think we'll keep an eye on you, Poland.
Meanwhile, Greece chats to NyoSeychelles.
Seychelles: Aren't you really, really hot in that?
Greece: I'm really, really hot all the time, hadn't you noticed?
Greece: Oh! Well, I don't intend to go to work if I can help it, but thanks.
Greece: Hey there, sexy. Wanna dance?
Poland: Like, ohmygawd yeah!
They're not the only one's feeling romantic tonight.
Greece: Wanna hold hands-
Poland: Keep 'em to yourself, you animal.
Greece: *sadface*
Poland: He's so dreeeeeamy ♥
Wait, weren't you just batting away his hands a moment ago?
Poland: Ex-CUSE me, it's called, like, playing hard to get, y'know?
Going from that grin, I'm guessing it was very ~hard~ to get?
Poland: A gentleman never tells.
Wow, Japan and England seem to be getting on very well.
Thanks to community lot time travel weirdness, it's still morning when Poland dropped off a dream date bouquet, which brings the total to 2/50.
Gosh, Greece sure is popular. I've never had a sim get asked out on so many outings. He says yes, of course.
And I send them all to a bowling alley.
Britannia: It's really cold up in the clouds, with the snow, that's why I thought I'd come along tonight.
Ahhh, you have no idea how much fun I'm having watching everyone else hook up! Can you imagine what it'll be like after a few gens? The drama? The fights?
Latvia: Not really. How about you?
Vampire: Nah, all three of them look happy enough to me.
Greece: Did I hit anything?
Just the floor.
Happily this outing went much better than the last one.
New day, new outfit! Hope none of you have any clown phobias!
Greece: You know what? Fuck you.
Oh! Hi Italy, what are you doing here?
Italy: Just thought I'd pop in and say hi to Greece.
Aww, well that's nice, only Greece is at work. YES, REALLY! His want to stay home from work finally rolled away, so I sent him back.
And he promptly got promoted. Thanks for that, Seychelles.
Poland wants another date, so of course, Greece says yes.
Poland: Not so sure about this new costume, honey. You should like, totally take it off.
So he did.
But believe it or not, it wasn't a dream date! See, I sent Greece to have a shower after sex, and the lot froze. I thought it was spawning a witch, so I waited, then suddenly there was that "time is running out!" pop-up and I realised time was still going. When I switched on boolprop, it threw an error on Seychelles and deleted her from the lot, but it was too late to save their date. THANKS, SEYCHELLES.
So. Final day of the challenge and I have something extra special for Greece!
Greece: I'm a shark!?
You're a shark!
Greece: ...I'm not finishing the rest of that stupid meme and you can't make me.
The bills arrive, including Greece's dine-and-dash.
Wow, again!? Well sure, why not?
I'd just like to take a moment to laugh at Greece's portrait. I WILL NEVER TIRE OF THIS OUTFIT EVER.
Greece: Yeah well, I'm already tired of it.
Tough.
Welcome to the frozen fish counter.
Greece: I'm not talking to you.
Poland: Oooooh, I like. He can hammerhead me any time, rowr.
Oh, thanks, Belgium and Prussia.
Prussia: Hey, you know what's way more awesome than some guy in a shark costume? My awesome self, of course!
Poland: Oh, well, I'll like, remember that, thanks.
Greece: What are they doing? I can't see very well out of this thing.
Poland: It's like, totally nothing to worry about! Smoochies!
Greece: Oooh, have a little love bite, hee hee. ♥
Prussia: Hmph.
I forgot to cap it, but it was another good outing. And as it's the end of the week, it's time for a new challenge.
Oh wow, well, that's going to make spouse-hunting interesting! But it's going to have to wait until the next update, so, see you then!
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