Random check-in.

[random_yayness]

I miss LJ and I miss you guys and I miss feeling like I could say things and I miss me.

But I have this roadblock in my head and I don't know that it can be shifted. And nothing I can say is new or productive or of interest to anyone else.

I'm sorry I'm not better. and I'm sorry I can't in good faith put a 'yet' on the end of that sentence.

Comments

[daemonwildcat]

*hugs* I miss you!!

I keep trying to write LJ entries, or more aptly feeling like I *should* but nothing comes when I try :(

No apologies! You are as you are, and you're hanging in there which is great :) Sorry you've been having a lousy time *hugs more*

[random_yayness]

*clings* I miss you, toooo. :( Thank you for commenting, I wasn't expecting any. ♥

I haven't even tried because I rarely have anything to say, and anything I would say is better put on my depressed tumblr where no one can be hurt or angered by what goes on in my brain. No one wants to hear that stuff. I just caught up on some LJs last night and felt the urge.

I'm not really hanging in there and it's not great. I'm just... here and can't do anything else besides being here. But I appreciate the thought and the feeling behind it. *hugs*

[daemonwildcat]

*clings back* I do try to comment though I don't post <3

You're still *here* which counts as hanging in there. Also, you have a future to look forward to, even if it seems out of your reach at times!

I wish I could drive out to Buffalo & take you out to McDs and a movie or something, just for the heck of it :)

[random_yayness]

I get what you're saying, but being here doesn't require me to do anything, so I don't really feel like it's anything to be proud of. I'm not doing anything with my time. And I'm a very 'now' person, so I'm not good at thinking about the future. It's all up in the air and "we'll see what happens" and unknowns, so I don't have anything concrete to imagine or hold on to. And I'm scared that external changes won't help my brain as much as I hope it does. I'm scared of a lot lately. :\

That would be awesome, especially since I've barely left the house since October. lol idk that I remember how to be social IRL, though. X)

[marginaliana]

*hugs*

[random_yayness]

*hugs back* Thank you. ♥

[venusinthenight]

I wish I knew what to say to help you. :(

*moar hugs*

[random_yayness]

It's nice to know you want to. ♥ *hugs*

[capra_maritimus]

*huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugs*

[random_yayness]

*hugs* Thank you! ♥

[crownglass39]

*hugs you*

[random_yayness]

Awww, thank you. ♥ *hugs*