Strength has nothing to do with overpowering every aspect of a situation you come across. You become stronger by going through the not so great occurrences in life. Everyone has a weakness, and not everyone knows what that weakness is. Something seems to be attacking you internally and you have no idea what it is. I had the exact same problem, sweetie. Two psychiatrists couldn't figure it out, but how could they? They didn't know me like I did. For only you know everything about your being. I have no words or advice to magically make you who it is you want to be. That what's so great/horrible about humanity "What we put into life is what we get out of it." Now slamming down your good friend Mr. Jimmy Beam doesn't seem to do doing a whole lot for you. I'm not going to be some person to tell you it's bad for you and you need to stop and all, but you need to find a different release from your pain. Even if you just need to go out somewhere at 2 in the morning, just call me sweetie. We used to be so much closer and it hurts
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Im sorry, I love you, and I want you to get better and be happy. Im coming home May 31. If you want to hang out call me. I really miss you still and I think it would be good for us to get drunk together again. Just remember I love you, and I always will, no matter what.
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