Archive 'fic: What a Kiss Means (Strawberry Mix) (IchiRuki theme 34, tempest)

[ramblinprose]

The title is slightly different in ichi_ruki memories, but I like this version better.

Follow-up to "first kiss"

Comments

[bakachanaileen]

This was excellent, very good, awesome, amazing! I really like the narration from Ichigo's point of view. The lines "Maybe it was the stabbing thing" and "very not perfect" were my favorites, but nearly everything in all capital letters was perfectly placed and worded. So well done. I really felt like I was there with them, particularly on the bench. Kisses being promises make me squeal like a fangirl.

Two suggestions: "Maybe she got him..." Use understood here, not got.

Typo (pick a verb): "He couldn't ignore shunt her off to the category "girl" after that."

[ramblinprose]

Thanks! Wow, that's effusive--thanks again! And though I struggled so much with it, I really enjoy narration from Ichigo's POV, too. It's electric, unstatic, full of energy--very different from doing most Bleach characters. There's a reason Ichigo draws in so many people, ne