Café Mocha: Chapter Twelve
Title: Café Mocha: Essential Child Raising Agent
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Genre: Romance, Humour
Rating/Warning/Spoilers: Adult concepts, Possibilities of some strong language, Subtle hints for season three
Summary: One night something unexpected comes through the rift and shocks the team.
In which Ianto finds a part of him he never knew he had, and Jack pervs on babies.
Author's Notes: Kudos to my wonderful beta Aaya, whose help has been immeasurable.
Disclaimer: I own nothing: it all belongs to Russell T. Davies. No profit is being made, and no copyright infringement is intended.
Picture of baby here l Previous parts: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11
AN: This is unbeta'd and soon as I send and get the beta'd version back from my beta I shall replace this post with it. (This may take a couple of weeks since she is overwhelmed with work, not that I'm not, but really, I feel sorry for her.) I found it very difficult to write this chapter, especially as I was ill, so I kinda gave up and wrote chapter thirteen instead which I shall post soon.
Anyway, enough excuses and on with the (transitional) chapter...
“How was your date Tosh?” asked Ianto as he walked into his kitchen, putting his comm. on his ear.
“Really good,” Tosh said, sighing happily, “He’s really nice, his name’s James and he’s a doctor.”
Ianto raised an eyebrow at the similarities (similarity in reality) between him and Owen but didn’t comment, “Sounds good to me.”
“It was fantastic Ianto, I mean he’s perfect-he’s sweet, charming and hilarious.” Tosh paused and lowered her voice, “I think he’s The One.” She paused and took a sip of her coffee. “Argh, this is frustrating, why aren’t you coming in before lunch? That way I could regale you with fantastic stories about him for an hour.”
Ianto laughed, “What privileges I hold at work.”
“Well I have to go,” Tosh said, “I’m being pushed off the line.”
There were two clicks and then there was a background buzz.
“I miss you already,” Jack whined over the comms.
Ianto smirked, “Of course you do.”
“I can hear that smirk Mr Jones,” Jack said.
“And?” Ianto replied teasingly, “You’re the one at work. I’m a free spirit, me.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Jack asked, suspicious.
“Well maybe you could come at home at lunch.” Ianto paused, “And bring my stopwatch with you.”
Owen’s voice cut into the conversation, “Hello?”
“Are you eavesdropping Owen?” Jack asked, amused at the situations that Owen seemed to find himself in.
Owen sounded horrified, “What the hell are you talking about? I was just taking a shower and my comm was buzzing on my bedside unit.”
“Get your butt into work and buzz off then,” Jack muttered as he fiddled with his Wrist-Strap.
Ianto heard a beep and then the buzzing in the background stopped.
“That was a terrible joke,” he muttered as he moved Grace, who was asleep, into his bedroom. “And it was rude, you didn’t even give him any warning.”
Jack explained, “Well, I didn’t want him to listen on us having phone sex.”
“For the last time I’m not having phone sex with you…” Ianto paused as he dragged Grace’s cot into his bedroom, “Well not on the comms anyway, can you imagine if you’ve got Gwen on the line like we did Owen?”
“Does it count as phone sex if it’s on the comms?” Jack mused, ignoring Ianto’s apprehension.
Ianto sighed, “What did I just say?”
“I’m wearing those briefs you like.” Jack murmured sexily as he surveyed the empty Hub (and his reflection) from his office window.
Ianto descended into a coughing fit as he choked on his coffee. His voice was strained when he managed to speak again, “Really?”
Jack grinned, glad that he had Ianto’s attention, “And what are you wearing Mr Jones?”
The front door knocked and Ianto jumped, swearing as he tripped over his shoes.
“Coming,” he called as he checked that the flat was not as messy as it had been that morning.
“Oh how I wish you were.” Jack muttered into his ear and it took nearly all of Ianto’s willpower not to shiver at the stray fantasies that kept popping into his brain.
He opened the front door and looked at the men on either side, “You’re here to collect the furniture?”
They nodded and walked into the hallway as the taller one handed him a clipboard, “Sign and print your name here.”
“What are we getting rid of?” The shorter one with sandy hair asked.
“Erm,” Ianto handed him the clipboard and pointed to the door to Grace’s room. “all the furniture is in there.”
They followed Ianto into the room and looked at the wardrobe and bed.
“Well, Tom,” the tall, dark haired man said, “how’d you want to go about this?”
The shorter man, who Ianto had now learnt was called Tom, “I think we’ll take the smaller one first, then the bigger one later?”
“Sure,” the other man said, “sounds good to me.”
“I’ll go first with this bit, then you two take the bottom, okay Richard?”
Richard nodded and took that as his cue to take the mattress off the base.
Ianto whistled, “Is that going to fit in there?” He asked curiously, “It looks too big.”
Richard surveyed the doorway as he lined the mattress up with it, “It’ll fit, good thing there’s no friction round here. It’ll just slide right on through.”
“Hurry up and do your thing,” Tom called to Richard’s retreating back, “This is going to be one heavy bugger and we might catch up with you.”
Richard swore at the other man, but it was muffled through the walls. Tom laughed at how easy it was to wind the other man up before he ran a hand through his hair and winked at Ianto.
“Ready to get this fella moving?”
Ianto nodded and raised his eyebrows, slightly wary of how enthusiastic the other man was.
There was a thump as they tried to slide it over the stop at the bottom of the door and it landed on Tom’s foot. “Shit, that hurt…”
Ianto looked, up concerned, grunting as he pulled the weight back to his side. “You ok?”
Tom frowned and pouted, reminding him of Jack, “Burns a little.”
Ianto waited a moment before he suggested moving the furniture as he knew Grace was going to be up soon, “Just lift on the count of three and it’ll be easier, one, two, three. Lift.”
Tom pulled the base back towards him, guiding it across Ianto’s kitchen and round the worktop corner, “Careful, it’s a little tight here.”
Ianto turned the base a bit more to the left, and pushed it out, until he was forced to turn it the opposite direction, “Wait, turn that way, bit more.” He exhaled as they turned it to just the right angle to get it out the kitchen, “Just right.”
“Slide it forward a bit…” Tom prompted as they slid it down the steps that led to his front door which was at a slightly lower level than the rest of the flat. “Bit more…”
“You got that end?” Ianto hesitated before he pushed the base down the stairs into Tom. He grunted as they lifted the base to get it out the front door. “I’m so glad I’m getting paid for this...”
The phone rang as Ianto counted the money the two men had left for him after hauling off the wardrobe.
“Ianto.” Jack said. “What the hell was that?”
Ianto frowned and repeated his words, “What the hell was what?”
Jack mimicked Tom’s earlier words, “Oooh, it burns a little… And the noises! It was like listening to porn.”
Ianto raised an eyebrow, knowing that Jack was exaggerating, “You need to get over yourself .”
“And you need to hire some decent people to remove furniture in future,” Jack muttered.
“If you were really worried,” interrupted Ianto, “you would have been over here like a shot.”
Jack mumbled something about CCTV being really handy and Ianto wondered what he’d got himself into. It was only later that evening when his musings became more literal than metaphorical.
Chapter Thirteen