fourth bullet :: video
[The feed clicks on. Mami's sitting against a tree on the outskirts of the Gardens, knees tucked against her chest and arms loosely wrapped around them. The camera angle is awkward, showing as it does only her back and a partial view of her side; still, it's enough to see the corners of those gold eyes and how red they are from crying
( Read more... )
...T-Tomoe-san?
Reply
Desperately, Mami tries to shield herself emotionally in any way possible, hiding behind the remains of old bitterness and a now pointless grudge- hiding how she can't physically get up and walk away. Not with her mother there, ready to cut her back down to ribbons until she's on her knees.]
Please go away, Akemi-san.
Reply
She almost makes the gesture to do so, to close the mirror, as requested. But she can't just give up without trying to help one who had helped her so much in the past.]
...There's someone there, isn't there? Is someone trying to do something to you? Where are you?
Reply
If you know what's good for you, you'll kindly keep your nose out of this.
I'm- perfectly fine.
Reply
The distance between her and this Mami is something she's dealt with before...but she had hoped that things were better than this, that things between them had begun to repair.
But maybe they could never be that way again. Maybe it was pointless to have ever hoped for that.]
Sorry, I...
...sorry...
[She makes the motion to dismiss her mirror, ready for tears herself.]
Reply
You're no better than the Akemi-san I've always known if you fail to understand how another feels. Why would I want your help? You can't do anything. No one can. This is...
[The expression trembles, and she bites down hard on her lower lip.]
...this is all I deserve.
Reply
You can't do anything.
It's like that day again, when she felt that way herself, when the witch nearly took her life.
It hurts to hear that, but she could move on and accept those words. It would be easy to do that...
But that last statement is not something she can accept from Mami.]
T-That's not right!! How...how could you deserve to be told things like that?!
You're not useless...you saved me...you saved a lot of people...
Reply
I killed my parents, Akemi-san! Nothing- nothing can make up for that! I could save a thousand people and it wouldn't be enough! How could it be enough?
I'm...I'm no one to admire. I never was.
Reply
Homura always knew there was some sorrow there, hidden well beneath the smile and confidence that Mami wore so well, but just how deep the melancholy went was never really clear. Until now.
If even the great may fall like this, prey to their own inner demons, who might one look up to?
But this is not a world abandoned to despair, not one in which lies and fears could overwhelm the truth.]
It's not true!
It's a lie, Tomoe-san....please, don't believe it...you know it's not true!
Reply
No, Akemi-san, I...If I had wished to save them instead of to survive, they wouldn't be dead. It wouldn't be my fault. That's not something I can turn my back on.
Reply
They wouldn't blame you. You didn't even have a chance to think about it. They wouldn't want you to suffer...
Please, Tomoe-san...whoever that is, it can't be your parents...don't listen to them!
Reply
[a choking noise]
-no one can love a murderer.
Reply
And friends...you have friends here who care for you...Miki-san...Kaname-san... [She pauses, only adding the last with uncertainty.] me...
Reply
Reply
I'm- I'm so unspeakably selfish.
Reply
Reply
Leave a comment