Climbing out of the pit

[quantumduck]

Over the last few months the world seems to be hammering me down with a serious storm of crap around every corner. I keep thinking I've hit bottom. I WANT to hit bottom. I figure once I hit bottom I won't need to worry about loss and pain so much. The funny thing is that I'm not actually any good at keeping my head down and just waiting tough times

Comments

[czarina4]

Come move to the mountains with me?

I am sorry you are feeling all of these things. Life sucks sometimes. But you are my hero for checking on the turtles, and I am sure Tina (that is the small one's name) would say that you are her hero as well.

[doctorcaligari]

Anger is good. Anger is fundamentally about lack of acceptance of suck.

It is a starting point.

Hang in there. I know there's a home for your many talents somewhere.

[cuddlyeconomist]

So -- the 5 stages don't always happen in that order -- and here is the really fun part -- sometimes they cycle around -- especially anger and depression.

With Erin I did denial and bargaining before she died. I pretended until I got the amnio that maybe they were wrong -- even though my body was changing. Then I bargained with a god or gods I don't really believe in. Once she had gone -- I cycled through anger and depression (and still am) for a long time.

You have had a hard road to hoe these last few months. I hope that you use the strength of your anger as cleaning and figure out how to define yourself in a way that is positive, regardless of the outside circumstance.

Do remember that you have people that love you, and that it will be ok.

[greeneyedkitty]

Sending many sympathetic and empathetic hopeful vibes and thoughts your way. Until you said it, I'd not realized that although I've changed it about myself once, I had started, again, to derive identity from the job I do or do not do. And the truth is that I'm a whole heck of a lot more things than I'll ever (probably) do at one job. SO! We'll both keep trying to remind ourselves of that and find things that make us happy or that pay the bills and can be walked away from when the happy things appear.

[memeslayer]

I'll grant that your job was pretty cool, but come on, Hollywood isn't the *only* place with fun work to do. Searching for jobs definitely sucks, but you'll be okay in the end.

[bassfingers]

Indeed. There's always Bollywood!!!

[memeslayer]

Ooh, I like that idea!