The "Things One Should Never Say During Sex" Game!

[puella_nerdii]

Signups for the Hetalia Rarepairs Exchange close at 12:00 PM EST tomorrow!

...now that that's out of the way!

So in the comments to the FrUK failsex, uh, thing, people -- most notably wizzard890, but I think there were others? -- brought up Things One Should Never Say During Sex

Comments

[noonish]

The feel of your dick in me reminds me of that time I fapped with a Taco Bell burrito.

[noonish]

FUCK ME LIKE AN ORCA.

[puella_nerdii]

-- there is an awful and insensitive joke to make here about SeaWorld.

[noonish]

There is, but instead I'll say

I bought this condom LIKE NEW off eBay. Do you like it?

[shirasakura]

Oh shit--I forgot to take my yeast infection meds.

[puella_nerdii]

Burn.

Literally.

Another, before I go to sleep

[shirasakura]

You are insured, eh right?

And again

[shirasakura]

BOOM headshot.

[alliterations]

"wait wait wait....did I leave the stove on?!...I think I did...wait, no, I didn't. I did? I didn't. I /didn't/. Okay."

[puella_nerdii]

...yeah um. I may or may not know what you mean here.

[alliterations]

heh XD

[lynn_pryderi]

KA ME
HA ME
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

oh fuck, what did I just do

[alliterations]

YOU WIN.

[puella_nerdii]

OH DEAR GOD

I feel so sorry for Chi Chi.

[clowderheart]

Something wonderful.

[angevin2]

"What the hell is that?"

-- this was invoked on a Simpsons DVD commentary as the absolute worst thing to hear right before the surgeon puts you under, but I think it works for sex too.

[puella_nerdii]

Unless you have a big old xenokink? Yeah.