Challenge response

[fianna9]

I’ve watched you grow…
By: Fianna9
Prompt: Surprising origin
Verse: G1/AU
Rating: PG13
Warnings: mentions of violence, mature themes, het, slash and threesomes; Cybertronian cursing
Summary: the contemplations of a carrier at her creation’s bonding celebration

This is my first time posting anything to a forum; constructive criticism is welcome. Thank you

Comments

[darkeyes_17]

You kept me guessing until the very last few lines. I was trying to piece it all in my head, but then I just went with the flow of the narrative. This is great, very creative and imaginative (threesome between the fire bots is such a win!).

Oooh, Onslaught is Prowl's creator...big surprise.

But this was great, finding out about a different take on Prowl's life.

[fianna9]

There were things I was worried wouldn't go together, but Prowl and the bunny insisted that they needed to be there. It was meant to keep people guessing, so I'm glad that worked. Thank you.

[usagi_atemu_tom]

Awwww, to imagine Prowl being raised by Inferno and Red Alert of all mechs and also Firestar. So sweet. A nice, interesting little story. And with a happy end, which is really, really good.
A well done job!

[fianna9]

Thank you, I thought this little story needed a happy ending.

[zea_taylor]

That was such an interesting set of twists and turns! I enjoyed guessing at where you were taking this, and I loved some of the imagery - little Prowl licking everything to see what it was was a very sweet image. And I could just imagine a bright eyed youngling Prowl trailing after Wheeljack. Painful as some of her memories were, it was lovely to see Prowl's carrier celebrating there at the end. Thanks for sharing.

[fianna9]

Those parts were some of the most fun to write. It's good to know that you enjoyed them.

[sideslip_tf]

Saw the note that this was your first post. Looks like a win to me! Captured well the thoughts of a mother for her child as she looked back over the past. Grrr - hate it when females are abused (but I understand it was needed for the story). Great job.

[fianna9]

I tried to keep the comments on the abuse to a minimum; truthfully, he would have--and probably has--done the exact same thing to a mech. Hopefully, she showed that she overcame it and learned to trust again. She hates the pit-spawn, but she doesn't really think about him anymore.

I'm glad you liked it even with that part.

[cmdrtekk]

This was a great twist on parental origins for Prowl. A rough view of a tough life that eventually found peace.

Thank you for sharing.

[fianna9]

The parallels that developed between Firestar and Prowl were interesting to write. Both of them had it hard but were fortunate to find those who would treasure them. Glad you liked it.