My daughter Samantha has been a blessing, a challenge, a heart-ache, a source of pride, and an on-going surprise.  The last few weeks have not changed that.

She became ill on Christmas eve, and by the following Sunday was so much worse that I took her to the hospital. They kept her until the following Friday. She has a UTI that turned into a double ( Read more... )

There is something of a debate going on recently about "following your passion", "doing what you love", "chasing your dreams", and the like.   While this debate is nothing new, it has been recently energized by the on-going problem of onerous student loan debt, by graduates not being able to find employment (gainful, or otherwise) in the field for ( Read more... )

As a lifelong night owl, I am quite familiar with the dark. We have been friends for as long as I can remember.  One of my earliest memories is getting scolded by my mom for being awake and looking at the stars through the window one night.  I was about 3, based on the fact that my brother Pete was still sleeping the crib and my youngest brother ( Read more... )

You're not hungry, you're just bored.

It's a habit, a vice, an artform, a crutch, a burden, a barrier, an indulgence, a treat, a sin, an obligation, and as much of who I am as the nose on my face.   And much like my nose, at times I am oblvious to it, and at other times very self-conscious of it.  But at no time do I feel the need to "fix" it.  Perhaps indulge in it less, let it have ( Read more... )

Yeah, ok, so this writing thing is harder than I think. Every. Single. Time ( Read more... )

I have, in times past, written about how I am partially defined by my stuff (insert reference to 10 year old LJ entry I was too lazy to look up despite having downloaded my entire LJ and saved it as a pdf in 2010).  Consequently, I have a lot of stuff, even for someone in my position, who lives alone and supports a family living elsewhere ( Read more... )

One advantage of growing older is that life slows down, and consequently, you start to notice more. The downside to that is becoming complacent happens much sooner than it used to.   And then when you want to get un-complacent, you have to think really hard where and when and why it happened. And then you realize that none of that matters and you ( Read more... )

People, as we all know, are creatures of habits.  Those of us who are OCD-driven are not just creatures of habits, but often (rightly or wrongly) defined by them.   Losing an old habit or acquiring a new one has always been a challenge for me.  I was in my 40s before I finally realized that my comfort zone isn't circumstantial but habitual.  And ( Read more... )

Being in the "right headspace" for writing has always been a precarious thing for me, and even more so after I have been away from it for so long.  Of course, there have been those moments when I thought "I need to lj this", but not been in anywhere near a position to take notes, let alone write.  Trying to recapture the moment well after the fact ( Read more... )