0296: Snape's daughter - Narcissa Black

[pottersues]

Y'know... Mary-Sues are actually getting more difficult to find at the Pit of Voles lately... we're probably just going through a short dry spell and will have them back en masse after PoA premieres, but it would be nice to think that word is getting around about me... "nonono! You can't write about a beautiful transfer student from America who is

Comments

[21stcherryboy]

*Twitches uncontrollably* Who are these characters?
The shortage of paragraphs burns meeeee...

[aciana]

That chick owes me a new monitor, since I just vomitted all over this one.

[niav]

"Ooo, you make me so happy!" said Narcissa happily.
Someone get me a bridge to jump off of.

[ciara_belle]

Narcissa had always considered him just as a friend.

Could that be because he's your cousin? Just a thought.

I've noticed the Sue-drought too. I had to go through 2 whole pages to find one for deleterius. Maybe the fangirls are finally learning? *hopes*

Paragraph Construction

[theoriginalspy]

What age is this person? I learned appropriate dialogue formatting in grade 5! It's really simple -- a different paragraph for each speaker. How can that possibly be difficult to remember?
Also, if this were ever made into a live performance (next on the BWT -- Bad Writing Television, "Toxic Sues." The following program deal with immature subject matter, viewer discretion, a barf bowl and a spork is advised) the soundtrack would have to feature banjos! Sirius is in love with Narcissa? Isn't that like causing your family tree to be a straight line instead of branching off.
(Dueling banjos is now playing.)

Re: Paragraph Construction

[thewhiteowl]

Hey, I'll bet the Blacks marrying their cousins is a longstanding tradition (Could explain the tendency to be slightly insane) My theory is that Sirius' mother, for a start was both born and married a Black.