My Walls, Defined....

Nov 08, 2007 11:04

This is a very raw post. If it makes you uncomfortable, then don't read it ( Read more... )

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Comments 12

mme_furiosa November 8 2007, 17:16:18 UTC
Holy Hell Dom! I am going to offer you a little piece of totally unsolicited advice:

When you find yourself being "snobby" or "critical" STOP. Ask yourself what your problem with whatever imperfection you are perceiving really is. Really. Dig...deeper.

You cannot expect people to live by the standards you live by. I loove visiting people's homes who are stark minimalists. They usually have values that are different than mine, and I find that fascinating, and worthwhile.

We can't all be the same. We can't all be whatever it is other people want us to be. And most of all, we can never, ever be happy if our lives are governed by expectation.

Expecting things is like going to a movie you already know you won't like and then complaining afterwards about how shitty it was. Expectations are a great way of creating disappointments.

On another note~I think it is very brave of you to expose yourself like this. Thanks for sharing.

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post_pedestal November 9 2007, 01:46:59 UTC
Mostly I'm a snob about art. And my biggest problem with most of the art in austin is quality control. Great concepts, but weak follow through.

About the living situations: usually it's condos, and it's really just laziness. I like minimalism, but not through apathy for ones living space.

I don't have any expectations, but I forget that people don't always live by the same standards as me. I guess this can be seen as an expectation by association. Or something.

"Expecting things is like going to a movie you already know you won't like and then complaining afterwards about how shitty it was."

I think I see where you're going with this one. I see it more as "if it looks like shit and smells like shit and tastes like shit, it's probably shit" and don't expect it to be something it's not.

Love you hon. Hopefully I'll see you soon?
-d

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kaiball November 8 2007, 17:35:04 UTC
Walls? Why... I'm making a movie about that!

I think the glory of what you've just written is that you include your own solution. Yes, you are an emotional fireball. And you know it. And you've realized that you might as well put it out there so that people can decide if they are able to deal and if not, get filtered.

So dance on. Rant on. The right people will be drawn to you.

Like me! I'd love to have a daytime non-bar hangout!

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post_pedestal November 9 2007, 01:48:42 UTC
You got it. It's kind of like trying to scare off the boys, but with this I'm being honest instead of trying.

So, when do you want to get some coffee?

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silona November 8 2007, 23:29:21 UTC
when I return - we shall hang out at my place where I live which is littered with symbols of my life and existence.

I relate to your post more than most people would ever realize.

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post_pedestal November 9 2007, 02:10:06 UTC
Give me a call, it sounds like a plan to me...xo

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heatherthegreat November 9 2007, 04:32:13 UTC
Have you thought about going back to EFT?

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post_pedestal November 9 2007, 15:08:02 UTC
Posting this was more relieving than EFT. Also posted it on myspace, and got a lot of feed back, none of it negative. EFT it to accept your emotions as you as, and after stating my truth so plainly, I've accepted it as an integral part of who I am, though not an immutable part. Posting this made me realize that I'm okay and love myself anyhow. So, I'm good.

Knowing that 300+ pairs of eyes had the ability to read about my inner workings was scary but felt really good. I got a lot of really good replies.

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heatherthegreat November 10 2007, 00:14:33 UTC
I'm very glad this was therapeutic! Shine on my dear.

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hazzmatt November 12 2007, 04:36:28 UTC
I dentify with this, except with whatever the girl equalivent of "weak pussy boys" is

"I'm afraid no one is ever going to love me. But I know that's not true. I know someone will love me, but I'll probably despise them. I'll see them as weak pussy boys, and I won't respect them. So let me say that: I'm afraid that no one whom I deem worthy of me will see me as worthy of them. "

When someone likes me I usually don't trust or respect them. It happens just about every time.
also,
I have to agree with the first comment, When something bothers you look inward and ask why?
It doesn't always work for me but sometimes it helps a lot.

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