I remember growing up wishing to be a grown up I knew that it would not be perfect that life throws you curves but I was excited to see where I was going and who I would be when I got there.  I got lost somewhere along the way, made a wrong turn somewhere and find myself starting over again.  I hope that this time around I make better decisions I ( Read more... )

 Have you ever had a moment where you stepped back looked at your life and asked "how did I get here, and who did I piss off?"  While through my life I have come to understand that there are certain parts of our lives we have no control over, I turned to faith to get me through these difficult times, without it I would have lost my mind or given up ( Read more... )

My whole life I have wanted to be a wife and a mother.  I want to stay home and raise babies take care of my husband and all that.  I know that it is old fashioned but its what I want what I have always wanted and now I am not sure that I will ever get that dream..  To make matters worse I have spent most of my adult life wondering what if.  What ( Read more... )

I use to watch this soap opera (I know not something that I would normally admit) on it there was one character that believed that she and this man were soul mates.  No matter how many times either of them got married she still held out believing that in the end they would end up together that "fate" meant for them to be together.  I hated that ( Read more... )

 Why is it that there are some guys that can take anything that you say and turn it around into something perverted?  I know that I can at times be the queen of perv with my girlfriends and sometimes with my guy friends but I like to think that I know where to draw the line.  How do you respond to a Facebook post with a pervy response knowing that ( Read more... )

 Its 2:30am and I can't sleep.  Its been a long time since I have had this particular problem.  I can not seem to turn off my brain, I am scared.  Not about the things that usually scare me, not my relationship with N, or my dad.  I am terrfied that I have been handed a way to make my dreams come true and I am going to fall flat on my face.  I am ( Read more... )

Its funny how you get caught up in the early part of the relationship you want to spend as much of your free time together as you can your whole life is put on hold for the few times that the two of you can spend together.  I tried not to do that but I am not sure that I did that well with all the health problems and the rare times N does not have ( Read more... )

I was once told that a person never really knows them self until they live alone.  At first I thought that it was crazy, why does it take living alone to learn who you are?  You should know that but he was right its not until you are alone with yourself that you learn what you want out of life and what you want not only from a relationship but what ( Read more... )

I met N's mom this weekend and per usual I started to worry about the "kiss of death" to all my relationships.  I always put off meeting the mom because after I do the relationship ends within six months.  I know that it is stupid and there is no way that on has to do with the other and yet I still feel like the relationship is doomed.  When all of ( Read more... )

When I agreed to be a part of the intervention I thought that my part in it would be hanging out with the two year old in the hotel room, never meeting the drug addict that my friend was trying to help, I had no intention of meeting her I was there as a nanny only.  Its funny that this intervention would wind up helping ME more that the intended ( Read more... )