The Big Bang Theory: Best of Season Two
CHALLENGE 21 BRAIN TWIN
Brain twins/triplets: maelyng and marie153rd
Fandom: The Big Bang Theory
Topic: Favorite Scene per Season Two Episode
The Big Bang Theory: Best of Season Two
Spoilers for The Big Bang Theory through the entirety of season two.
2.o1 The Bad Fish Paradigm
Possible Reasons Why Sheldon's Moving Out
Runner Up: Mom smokes in the car. Jesus is okay with it, but we can't tell Dad.
leonard: He says he's moving out.
raj: What did you do? Did you change the contrast of brightness settings on the television?
leonard: No.
raj: Did you take a band-aid off in front of him?
leonard: No.
howard: Did you buy generic ketchup? Forget to rinse the sink? Talk to him through the bathroom door?
raj: Adjust the thermostat? Cook with cilantro? Pronounce the 't' in 'often'?
leonard: No.
howard: Did you make fun of trains?
2.o2 The Codpiece Topology
Spock!Sheldon
Runner Up: Hop, you little plumber. Hop, hop, hop!
sheldon: Captain, I'm getting an unusual reading.
leonard: Yeah, that's great. You guys want corn dogs?
sheldon: That's a temporal anomaly! Corn dogs didn't come into existence 'til the first half of the twentieth century.
2.o3 The Barbarian Sublimation
Penny's Online Registration
Runner Up: Are you currently involved in a sexual relationship? ...Would you like to be?
sheldon: So listen, would you describe your ideal vacation as a wild adventure to unknown lands or staying at home, curled up with a good book?
penny: Wait, what?
sheldon: These are market research questions. I'm filling out the online registration for your game.
penny: Oh, okay. Uh, wild adventure. ...oh frenzy stance isn't working. Die you undead mummies, die!
sheldon: Drink a healing potion.
penny: Thank you.
sheldon: You're welcome. Anyhow, on a scale of one to five, with one being always initiated by him and five being always initiated by you, how do you prefer your sexual encounters to begin?
penny: That's on the registration?
sheldon: Oh yes, it's quite extensive. But if we complete it, you get a free expansion pack: seventy-five additional quests.
penny: Ooh, awesome. Okay, I totally like to initiate; I'm a big ol' five.
sheldon: Good to know. Big ol' five.
2.o4 The Griffin Equivalency
Sheldon's Joker Smile
Runner Up: Raj apologizes to Penny (with real words a real word and everything!!).
sheldon: What do you want me to do?
leonard: Smile.
sheldon: [Smiles.]
howard: Oh crap, that's terrifying.
leonard: We're here to see Koothrappali, not kill Batman.
2.o5 The Euclid Alternative
Sheldon's Simulated Driving
Runner Up: Sheldon and Penny carpool.
sheldon [to his victims in the driving simulation]: Sorry! Excuse me! My bad! Student driver!
leonard: How'd you manage to get on the second floor of the Glendale Galleria?
sheldon: I don't know. I was on the Pasadena freeway, I missed my exit, flew off the overpass and one thing led to another.
leonard: Maybe you wanna give it a rest and try again tomorrow.
sheldon: No. I quit. [Moves away from the computer. Car revving, window breaking, puppy whines sound over the speaker.]
leonard: Aww, the pet store.
2.o6 The Cooper-Nowitzki Theorem
Sheldon's Fangirl and the Three Tined Fork
Runner Up: The gang's various theories concerning Sheldon's deal.
ramona: Could we get a cup of coffee sometime?
sheldon: I don't drink coffee.
howard: I do! I love me a cuppa Joe.
ramona: Well, it doesn't have to be coffee! How about dinner?
sheldon: I do eat dinner.
ramona: Great! I know a terrific little Italian place.
sheldon: I never eat in strange restaurants. One runs the risk of non-standard cutlery.
ramona: Excuse me?
leonard: Sheldon lives in fear of the three tined fork.
sheldon: Three tines is not a fork. Three tines is a trident. Forks are for eating, tridents are for ruling the seven seas.
ramona: What if I brought food to your place?
sheldon: That would be acceptable. On Mondays I eat Thai food. Mi krop and chicken satay with extra peanut sauce from Sian Palace.
ramona: You got it! I already have your address.
2.o7 The Panty Piñata Polarization
Banished from The Cheesecake Factory
Runner Up: I really don't think this is the kind of thing Jesus concerns himself with!
sheldon: You forgot my barbeque bacon cheeseburger; barbeque sauce, bacon and cheese on the side.
penny: Oh, I didn't tell you? You're banished from The Cheesecake Factory.
sheldon: Why?!
penny: Well, you have three strikes. One: coming in, two: sitting down, and three: I don't like your attitude.
sheldon: You can't do that. Not only is it in violation of California state law, it flies directly in the face of Cheesecake Factory policy.
penny: Yeah, no, there's a new policy: No Shoes, No Shirt, No Sheldon.
howard: I bet we could sell that sign all over Pasadena.
2.o8 The Lizard-Spock Expansion
Mrs. Dead To Me
Runner Up: Rock Paper Scissors Lizard Spock
leonard: Howard.
howard: Sheldon.
sheldon: Howard is employing a school yard paradigm in which you are, for all intents and purposes, deceased. He intends to act on this by not speaking to you, feigning an inability to hear you when you speak, and otherwise refusing to acknowledge your existence.
leonard: That's just ridiculous. Why are you cooperating with him?
sheldon: I don't make the rules, Leonard.
leonard: Howard, come on. I didn't plan on this. These things just happen. Usually not to me, but they do happen!
howard: Did someone just feel a cold breeze?
sheldon: I believe this is an extension of the death metaphor. The cold breeze is a so called ectoplasmic tissue of a disembodied soul passing by.
leonard: [Answers a knock at the door. It's Stephanie.]
howard: Oh, if it isn't Mrs. Dead To Me.
stephanie: Hello, Howard.
howard: Sheldon.
sheldon: I'm sorry, you violated the terms of your metaphor by acknowledging her existence. I'm out.
2.o9 The White Asparagus Triangulation
Finding the Acoustic Sweet Spot
Runner Up: Sheldon emulates today's urban youth.
stephanie: What is he doing?
leonard: He's finding the 'acoustic sweet spot'.
stephanie: Does he always do this?
leonard: Sometimes he brings a toy xylophone.
2.1o The Vartabedian Conundrum
Sheldonectomy
Runner Up: Sheldon and Leonard's Roommate Agreement.
stephanie: Oh, no.
sheldon: What?!
stephanie: You were right, your larynx is terribly inflamed. I mean, I've never seen anything like it.
sheldon: I knew it! What do I do?!
stephanie: You're gonna need to stop talking immediately.
sheldon: For how long-
stephanie: Shh! Immediately.
leonard: [Walks in.] Hey.
stephanie: Oh hi, honey.
leonard: Sheldon.
sheldon [Waves, clutches at his throat, mimes a bit, and scampers off.]
leonard: What's going on?
stephanie: I just performed a Sheldonectomy.
leonard: Careful. If you don't get it all, it'll just come back worse.
2.11 The Bath Item Gift Hypothesis
Next Year's Christmas Wish List: Healthy Ovum
Runner Up: Raj and Howard helping Sheldon pick out a gift basket for Penny.
sheldon: Oh. A napkin.
penny: Turn it over.
sheldon: To Sheldon: Live long and prosper, Leonard Nimoy.
penny: He came into the restaurant. Sorry the napkin's dirty, he wiped his mouth with it.
sheldon: I possess the DNA of Leonard Nimoy?!
penny: Yeah, yeah, I guess, but look, he signed it.
sheldon: Do you realize what this means?! All I need is a healthy ovum and I can grow my own Leonard Nimoy!
penny: Okay, all I'm giving you is the napkin, Sheldon.
2.12 The Killer Robot Instability
Robot Street Fight
Runner Up: We're all pathetic and cweepy and can't get girls.
sheldon: Kripke. I would ask if your robot is prepared to 'meet its maker', but as you are its maker, clearly the two of you have met.
kripke: What is his problem?
raj: Way to bust out the Jedi mind tricks, dude.
leonard: I just want to make sure that we're all clear; standard Robotic Fighting League rules apply.
kripke: Are you crazy? This is a street fight! The street has no rules.
sheldon: He's right, Leonard. The paradigm is 'to the death'.
kripke: I will, however, give you the opportunity to concede my superiority now and offer me your robot as the spoils of war.
sheldon: Never! I'd rather see M.O.N.T.E. dead than in your hands!
kripke: That can be easily arranged. Ready set go?
sheldon: Do it.
kripke: Alright then. Ready. Set. Go. [Robots fight.]
raj: Come on, Sheldon, you got this.
sheldon: Indeed. We are prepared for anything he can throw at us. [Kripke's robot starts spitting fire.] That's new.
leonard: Run M.O.N.T.E., run!
raj: Go, go, go!
sheldon: Don't hurt us, don't hurt us, don't hurt us!!!
2.13 The Friendship Algorithm
Stu the Cockatoo is New at the Zoo
Runner Up: Sheldon's stuck in an infinite loop. Howard saves the day.
sheldon: Alright, let's see. Berny Bunny Has Two Daddies Now, that's probably about homosexual rabbits. Gerry the Gerbil and the Bullies on the Bus, read it, not helpful. Oh! Oh, here we go. Stu the Cockatoo is New at the Zoo. Author Sarah Carpenter lives in Fort Wayne, Indiana with her husband and best friend, Mark, and their cockatoo, Stu. Hardly makes her an expert in making friends, wouldn't you agree?
rebecca: I don't like birds. They scare me.
sheldon: Me too. Most people don't see it. What are you reading?
rebecca: Curious George.
sheldon: Oh, I do like monkeys.
rebecca: Curious George is a monkey.
sheldon: Somewhat anthropomorphised, but yes. Say, maybe sometime you and I can go see monkeys together. Would you like that?
rebecca: Okay.
leonard: Sheldon, what are you doing?
sheldon: I'm making friends with this little girl. What's your name?
rebecca: Rebecca.
sheldon: Hi, Rebecca. I'm your new friend, Sheldon.
leonard: No, you're not. Let's go.
sheldon: We were really hitting it off!
leonard: Don't look up, there's cameras.
2.14 The Financial Permeability
This Deceptive Container of Peanut Brittle
Runner Up: Yes; Koothrappali's going to wet himself, I'm gonna throw up, Sheldon's gonna run away, and you're going to die.
sheldon: You know it occurs to me, you could solve all your problems by attaining more money.
penny: Yes. It occurs to me, too.
sheldon: Hang on a moment. [Presents Penny with a wad of cash hidden in the joke can of peanut brittle.] Here, take some. Pay me back when you can.
penny: Wow, you got a lot of money in there.
sheldon: That's why it's guarded by snakes. Take some.
penny: Don't be silly.
sheldon: I'm never silly. Here.
penny: No, I can't.
sheldon: Don't you need money?
penny: Well, yeah, but-
sheldon: This is money I'm not using.
penny: Yeah, but what if you need it?
sheldon: My expenses account for 46.9% of my after tax income. The rest is divvied up between a small savings account, this deceptive container of peanut brittle, and the hollowed out buttocks of a superhero action figure who shall remain nameless for his own protection. ...or her own protection. Take some.
penny: Really? I mean, are you sure?
sheldon: I see no large upcoming expenditures. Unless they devolope an affordable technology to fuse my skeleton with adamantium, like Wolverine.
penny: Are they working on that?
sheldon: I sincerely hope so.
2.15 The Maternal Capacitance
Sheldon and Leonard's Mom Rocking Out to Journey
Runner Up: You're like the Jar Jar Binks of the Hofstadter family.
All night (all night!) All night (all night!)
Oh every night (every night!)
So hold tight (hold tight!) Hold tight (hold tight!)
Baby, hold tight
Any way you want it that's the way you need it
Any way you want it
-Any Way You Want It Journey
2.16 The Cushion Saturation
Sheldon's Entire World is Turned On Its Head
Runner Up: We? No, no, no. You had your chance to be 'we' for, like, a year and a half now. Right now you are you and you are screwed.
leonard: Sheldon, I have some bad news.
sheldon: More?
leonard: I'm afraid so. You know the cashew chicken I get you on Monday nights?
sheldon: Yes, from Szechuan Palace.
leonard: Szechuan Palace closed two years ago.
sheldon: What? Where did my cashew chicken come from?
leonard: Golden Dragon.
sheldon: No! No, this isn't right. No, our food always comes in Szechuan Palace containers.
leonard: Yeah, well, before they went out of business I bought four thousand containers. I keep them in the trunk of my car.
sheldon: But- Oh, this changes everything.
leonard [to Penny]: I thought that might take his mind off the cushion.
sheldon: What's real? What isn't? How can I know?
2.17 The Terminator Decoupling
Only Meemaw!!!
Runner Up: Hi. I'm the small package good things come in.
penny: Okay, I got a box, but there's no key in here. Just letters.
sheldon: That's the wrong box, put it back.
penny: Oh, Sheldon. Are these letters from your grandmother?
sheldon: Don't read those letters!
penny: Oh, look, she calls you Moonpie. That is so cute!
sheldon: PUT DOWN THE LETTERS!!!
leonard: [Takes the phone from Sheldon.] Hey, Penny, it's Leonard.
penny: Hey, Leonard. How's the train ride?
leonard: Delightful. Listen, I don't know what you're doing right now, but there are little bubbles forming in the corner of Sheldon's mouth.
penny: Okay, yeah, I kinda crossed a line. Put him back on.
leonard: Thank you. [Hands the phone back to Sheldon.]
sheldon: I'm back.
penny: What up, Moonpie?
sheldon: No one calls me Moonpie but Meemaw!
2.18 The Work Song Nanocluster
Sheldon and Penny Making Penny Blossoms
Runner Up: Zoom, zoom! ZOOM ZOOM ZOOM!!!
sheldon: I'm a deep water sailor just come from Hong Kong
penny&sheldon: To my way, hey, blow the man down
sheldon: If you'll give me some whiskey, I'll sing you a song
penny&sheldon: Give me some time to blow the man down
leonard: Hello?
penny&sheldon: Hello.
penny&sheldon: To my way, hey, blow the man down
sheldon: Or I'll help you along with the toe of my boot
penny&sheldon: Give me some time to blow the man down
leonard: What's going on?
sheldon: I assume you're referring to the sea shanty. That's a rhythmic work song designed to increase productivity.
penny: Yeah, it's crazy, but it totally works. Look! We made this Penny Blossom in under three minutes.
leonard: Terrific, but that kinda raises more questions than it answers.
2.19 The Dead Hooker Juxtaposition
Penny Throws Down with the Dead Hooker
Runner Up: It's a trap!
penny: Well, you know, it's just that Leonard and Howard and Raj, they aren't like other guys. They're special.
elisha: Okay, they're special. And?
penny: Let's see, how can I explain this? They don't know how to use their shields.
elisha: Shields?
penny: Yeah, you know, like in Star Trek when you're in battle and you raise the shields. ...where the hell'd that come from? Anyways, you know how guys like this are, so please don't take advantage of them.
elisha: Who says I'm taking advantage of them?
penny: Come on. They're doing everything for you because you're leading them on.
elisha: So I let them do stuff for me. They're happy, I get stuff, who cares? And how's it any different from what you do?
penny: Excuse me?
elisha: I've seen you around them, are you pretending like you don't do the exact same thing?
penny: Okay, lady. You are way out of line.
elisha: Oh, I'm out of line?
penny: Yeah. You're outta line.
elisha: Well. What're you gonna do about it, bitch?
2.20 The Hofstadter Isotope
Better Watch That Tone, Stuart
Runner Up: I'm a falcon who hunts better solo.
stuart: I'm sorry, but you're obviously stuck in a pre-Zero Hour DC universe.
sheldon: Of course I am! Removing Joe Chill as the killer of Batman's parents effectively deprived him of his raison d'etre.
stuart: Okay, you can throw all the french around you want, it doesn't make you right.
sheldon: Au contraire.
stuart: Plus, you're forgetting that the Infinite Crisis storyline restored Joe Chill to the Batman mythology!
sheldon: I am forgetting nothing and I resent your tone.
stuart: Okay, look, Sheldon, it's late. I've gotta get some sleep.
sheldon: So I win.
stuart: No! I'm tired.
sheldon: So I win.
stuart: Fine, you win.
sheldon: Darn tootin', I win.
2.21 The Vegas Renormalization
Jewish Girlfriend Experience
Runner Up: Sure! Why not?! And after the sun goes down, we can all pile in my pick-up and go skinny dippin' down at the crick, because today's the day to stop making sense!
raj: Hello, again.
mikayla: Oh, hi.
leonard: Yeah, hi, listen. If you're not busy, we were thinking maybe you could... We were wondering-
raj: If you're really a prostitute.
mikayla: You guys cops?
leonard:&raj: No.
mikayla: I'm a prostitute.
leonard Okay, great! Um... The thing is, we've got this friend and he's kind of down in the dumps and we thought maybe you could cheer him up.
raj: With sex.
leonard: I think she knows what I meant.
raj: How can she when you beat around the bush?! She's from the mean streets where they shoot from the hip and keep it real.
mikayla: Don't worry, I can take good care of your friend.
leonard: Okay, terrific. Listen, is there a way that we can do this where he doesn't know that you're a... you know.
raj: Prostitute.
mikayla: You want the girlfriend experience.
leonard: Yes, yeah, exactly. The girlfriend experience.
raj: Actually, if it's not too much to ask, could we have the Jewish girlfriend experience?
2.22 The Classified Materials Turbulence
Anarchy! Is That What You Want, Leonard?!
Runner Up: For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. Leonard pretends to be a friend and acts like a two faced bitch. Therefore, he's reborn as a banana slug.
leonard: [Leonard's cell rings. He checks the caller ID and then ignores it.] Oh, Stuart.
sheldon: You're not going to answer it?
leonard: He wants to talk about Penny. I don't want to talk about Penny.
sheldon: You're making an assumption. Perhaps the comic book store is on fire and he needs your assistance.
leonard: Why would he call me?
sheldon: We don't know. And if you don't answer the phone, we can't know.
leonard: I'm not answering the phone, Sheldon.
sheldon: Answer the phone, Leonard.
leonard: No! [His phone makes a new alert sound.] There. It went to voicemail.
sheldon: ...Aren't you going to check your messages?
leonard: No.
sheldon: You have to check your messages, Leonard! The leaving of a message is one half of a social contract, which is completed by the checking of the message. If that contract breaks down, then all social contracts break down and we descend into anarchy.
leonard: It must be hell inside your head.
2.23 The Monopolar Expedition
Tools of Leadership: Common Sense Sold Separately
Runner Up: Penny gifts Leonard with a snuggie. The two of them are a little bit adorable. Also, I want a snuggie.
sheldon: Gentleman, use your imagination! Innovate! Did Han Solo let Luke Skywalker freeze to death on the ice planet of Hoth? No! He cut open a Tauntaun and used its internal body heat to warm him up.
howard: You heard the man. Hold him down and I'll cut him open.
leonard: Hang on! I know I don't possess the 'tools of leadership', but I don't understand why we can't assemble the equipment inside the hut and then take it outside.
sheldon: I hadn't thought of that. I guess we're done here.
Yay! I'm glad this is finally posted. I'm filling a couple of topics in this month's challenge, but this is definitely the one I'm most proud of, so I hope you like it!
Also, make sure to check out the picspam of my challenge brain twin, maelyng, here!
credits:
-Font: Walkway Rounded
-Screencaps all taken and colored by me.
-Journey MP3 uploaded by me.
Did you like? Leave a comment! :D
Please do not use for anything without credit. ♥
moar picspams
Brain twins/triplets: maelyng and marie153rd
Fandom: The Big Bang Theory
Topic: Favorite Scene per Season Two Episode
The Big Bang Theory: Best of Season Two
Spoilers for The Big Bang Theory through the entirety of season two.
2.o1 The Bad Fish Paradigm
Possible Reasons Why Sheldon's Moving Out
Runner Up: Mom smokes in the car. Jesus is okay with it, but we can't tell Dad.
leonard: He says he's moving out.
raj: What did you do? Did you change the contrast of brightness settings on the television?
leonard: No.
raj: Did you take a band-aid off in front of him?
leonard: No.
howard: Did you buy generic ketchup? Forget to rinse the sink? Talk to him through the bathroom door?
raj: Adjust the thermostat? Cook with cilantro? Pronounce the 't' in 'often'?
leonard: No.
howard: Did you make fun of trains?
2.o2 The Codpiece Topology
Spock!Sheldon
Runner Up: Hop, you little plumber. Hop, hop, hop!
sheldon: Captain, I'm getting an unusual reading.
leonard: Yeah, that's great. You guys want corn dogs?
sheldon: That's a temporal anomaly! Corn dogs didn't come into existence 'til the first half of the twentieth century.
2.o3 The Barbarian Sublimation
Penny's Online Registration
Runner Up: Are you currently involved in a sexual relationship? ...Would you like to be?
sheldon: So listen, would you describe your ideal vacation as a wild adventure to unknown lands or staying at home, curled up with a good book?
penny: Wait, what?
sheldon: These are market research questions. I'm filling out the online registration for your game.
penny: Oh, okay. Uh, wild adventure. ...oh frenzy stance isn't working. Die you undead mummies, die!
sheldon: Drink a healing potion.
penny: Thank you.
sheldon: You're welcome. Anyhow, on a scale of one to five, with one being always initiated by him and five being always initiated by you, how do you prefer your sexual encounters to begin?
penny: That's on the registration?
sheldon: Oh yes, it's quite extensive. But if we complete it, you get a free expansion pack: seventy-five additional quests.
penny: Ooh, awesome. Okay, I totally like to initiate; I'm a big ol' five.
sheldon: Good to know. Big ol' five.
2.o4 The Griffin Equivalency
Sheldon's Joker Smile
Runner Up: Raj apologizes to Penny (with real words a real word and everything!!).
sheldon: What do you want me to do?
leonard: Smile.
sheldon: [Smiles.]
howard: Oh crap, that's terrifying.
leonard: We're here to see Koothrappali, not kill Batman.
2.o5 The Euclid Alternative
Sheldon's Simulated Driving
Runner Up: Sheldon and Penny carpool.
sheldon [to his victims in the driving simulation]: Sorry! Excuse me! My bad! Student driver!
leonard: How'd you manage to get on the second floor of the Glendale Galleria?
sheldon: I don't know. I was on the Pasadena freeway, I missed my exit, flew off the overpass and one thing led to another.
leonard: Maybe you wanna give it a rest and try again tomorrow.
sheldon: No. I quit. [Moves away from the computer. Car revving, window breaking, puppy whines sound over the speaker.]
leonard: Aww, the pet store.
2.o6 The Cooper-Nowitzki Theorem
Sheldon's Fangirl and the Three Tined Fork
Runner Up: The gang's various theories concerning Sheldon's deal.
ramona: Could we get a cup of coffee sometime?
sheldon: I don't drink coffee.
howard: I do! I love me a cuppa Joe.
ramona: Well, it doesn't have to be coffee! How about dinner?
sheldon: I do eat dinner.
ramona: Great! I know a terrific little Italian place.
sheldon: I never eat in strange restaurants. One runs the risk of non-standard cutlery.
ramona: Excuse me?
leonard: Sheldon lives in fear of the three tined fork.
sheldon: Three tines is not a fork. Three tines is a trident. Forks are for eating, tridents are for ruling the seven seas.
ramona: What if I brought food to your place?
sheldon: That would be acceptable. On Mondays I eat Thai food. Mi krop and chicken satay with extra peanut sauce from Sian Palace.
ramona: You got it! I already have your address.
2.o7 The Panty Piñata Polarization
Banished from The Cheesecake Factory
Runner Up: I really don't think this is the kind of thing Jesus concerns himself with!
sheldon: You forgot my barbeque bacon cheeseburger; barbeque sauce, bacon and cheese on the side.
penny: Oh, I didn't tell you? You're banished from The Cheesecake Factory.
sheldon: Why?!
penny: Well, you have three strikes. One: coming in, two: sitting down, and three: I don't like your attitude.
sheldon: You can't do that. Not only is it in violation of California state law, it flies directly in the face of Cheesecake Factory policy.
penny: Yeah, no, there's a new policy: No Shoes, No Shirt, No Sheldon.
howard: I bet we could sell that sign all over Pasadena.
2.o8 The Lizard-Spock Expansion
Mrs. Dead To Me
Runner Up: Rock Paper Scissors Lizard Spock
leonard: Howard.
howard: Sheldon.
sheldon: Howard is employing a school yard paradigm in which you are, for all intents and purposes, deceased. He intends to act on this by not speaking to you, feigning an inability to hear you when you speak, and otherwise refusing to acknowledge your existence.
leonard: That's just ridiculous. Why are you cooperating with him?
sheldon: I don't make the rules, Leonard.
leonard: Howard, come on. I didn't plan on this. These things just happen. Usually not to me, but they do happen!
howard: Did someone just feel a cold breeze?
sheldon: I believe this is an extension of the death metaphor. The cold breeze is a so called ectoplasmic tissue of a disembodied soul passing by.
leonard: [Answers a knock at the door. It's Stephanie.]
howard: Oh, if it isn't Mrs. Dead To Me.
stephanie: Hello, Howard.
howard: Sheldon.
sheldon: I'm sorry, you violated the terms of your metaphor by acknowledging her existence. I'm out.
2.o9 The White Asparagus Triangulation
Finding the Acoustic Sweet Spot
Runner Up: Sheldon emulates today's urban youth.
stephanie: What is he doing?
leonard: He's finding the 'acoustic sweet spot'.
stephanie: Does he always do this?
leonard: Sometimes he brings a toy xylophone.
2.1o The Vartabedian Conundrum
Sheldonectomy
Runner Up: Sheldon and Leonard's Roommate Agreement.
stephanie: Oh, no.
sheldon: What?!
stephanie: You were right, your larynx is terribly inflamed. I mean, I've never seen anything like it.
sheldon: I knew it! What do I do?!
stephanie: You're gonna need to stop talking immediately.
sheldon: For how long-
stephanie: Shh! Immediately.
leonard: [Walks in.] Hey.
stephanie: Oh hi, honey.
leonard: Sheldon.
sheldon [Waves, clutches at his throat, mimes a bit, and scampers off.]
leonard: What's going on?
stephanie: I just performed a Sheldonectomy.
leonard: Careful. If you don't get it all, it'll just come back worse.
2.11 The Bath Item Gift Hypothesis
Next Year's Christmas Wish List: Healthy Ovum
Runner Up: Raj and Howard helping Sheldon pick out a gift basket for Penny.
sheldon: Oh. A napkin.
penny: Turn it over.
sheldon: To Sheldon: Live long and prosper, Leonard Nimoy.
penny: He came into the restaurant. Sorry the napkin's dirty, he wiped his mouth with it.
sheldon: I possess the DNA of Leonard Nimoy?!
penny: Yeah, yeah, I guess, but look, he signed it.
sheldon: Do you realize what this means?! All I need is a healthy ovum and I can grow my own Leonard Nimoy!
penny: Okay, all I'm giving you is the napkin, Sheldon.
2.12 The Killer Robot Instability
Robot Street Fight
Runner Up: We're all pathetic and cweepy and can't get girls.
sheldon: Kripke. I would ask if your robot is prepared to 'meet its maker', but as you are its maker, clearly the two of you have met.
kripke: What is his problem?
raj: Way to bust out the Jedi mind tricks, dude.
leonard: I just want to make sure that we're all clear; standard Robotic Fighting League rules apply.
kripke: Are you crazy? This is a street fight! The street has no rules.
sheldon: He's right, Leonard. The paradigm is 'to the death'.
kripke: I will, however, give you the opportunity to concede my superiority now and offer me your robot as the spoils of war.
sheldon: Never! I'd rather see M.O.N.T.E. dead than in your hands!
kripke: That can be easily arranged. Ready set go?
sheldon: Do it.
kripke: Alright then. Ready. Set. Go. [Robots fight.]
raj: Come on, Sheldon, you got this.
sheldon: Indeed. We are prepared for anything he can throw at us. [Kripke's robot starts spitting fire.] That's new.
leonard: Run M.O.N.T.E., run!
raj: Go, go, go!
sheldon: Don't hurt us, don't hurt us, don't hurt us!!!
2.13 The Friendship Algorithm
Stu the Cockatoo is New at the Zoo
Runner Up: Sheldon's stuck in an infinite loop. Howard saves the day.
sheldon: Alright, let's see. Berny Bunny Has Two Daddies Now, that's probably about homosexual rabbits. Gerry the Gerbil and the Bullies on the Bus, read it, not helpful. Oh! Oh, here we go. Stu the Cockatoo is New at the Zoo. Author Sarah Carpenter lives in Fort Wayne, Indiana with her husband and best friend, Mark, and their cockatoo, Stu. Hardly makes her an expert in making friends, wouldn't you agree?
rebecca: I don't like birds. They scare me.
sheldon: Me too. Most people don't see it. What are you reading?
rebecca: Curious George.
sheldon: Oh, I do like monkeys.
rebecca: Curious George is a monkey.
sheldon: Somewhat anthropomorphised, but yes. Say, maybe sometime you and I can go see monkeys together. Would you like that?
rebecca: Okay.
leonard: Sheldon, what are you doing?
sheldon: I'm making friends with this little girl. What's your name?
rebecca: Rebecca.
sheldon: Hi, Rebecca. I'm your new friend, Sheldon.
leonard: No, you're not. Let's go.
sheldon: We were really hitting it off!
leonard: Don't look up, there's cameras.
2.14 The Financial Permeability
This Deceptive Container of Peanut Brittle
Runner Up: Yes; Koothrappali's going to wet himself, I'm gonna throw up, Sheldon's gonna run away, and you're going to die.
sheldon: You know it occurs to me, you could solve all your problems by attaining more money.
penny: Yes. It occurs to me, too.
sheldon: Hang on a moment. [Presents Penny with a wad of cash hidden in the joke can of peanut brittle.] Here, take some. Pay me back when you can.
penny: Wow, you got a lot of money in there.
sheldon: That's why it's guarded by snakes. Take some.
penny: Don't be silly.
sheldon: I'm never silly. Here.
penny: No, I can't.
sheldon: Don't you need money?
penny: Well, yeah, but-
sheldon: This is money I'm not using.
penny: Yeah, but what if you need it?
sheldon: My expenses account for 46.9% of my after tax income. The rest is divvied up between a small savings account, this deceptive container of peanut brittle, and the hollowed out buttocks of a superhero action figure who shall remain nameless for his own protection. ...or her own protection. Take some.
penny: Really? I mean, are you sure?
sheldon: I see no large upcoming expenditures. Unless they devolope an affordable technology to fuse my skeleton with adamantium, like Wolverine.
penny: Are they working on that?
sheldon: I sincerely hope so.
2.15 The Maternal Capacitance
Sheldon and Leonard's Mom Rocking Out to Journey
Runner Up: You're like the Jar Jar Binks of the Hofstadter family.
All night (all night!) All night (all night!)
Oh every night (every night!)
So hold tight (hold tight!) Hold tight (hold tight!)
Baby, hold tight
Any way you want it that's the way you need it
Any way you want it
-Any Way You Want It Journey
2.16 The Cushion Saturation
Sheldon's Entire World is Turned On Its Head
Runner Up: We? No, no, no. You had your chance to be 'we' for, like, a year and a half now. Right now you are you and you are screwed.
leonard: Sheldon, I have some bad news.
sheldon: More?
leonard: I'm afraid so. You know the cashew chicken I get you on Monday nights?
sheldon: Yes, from Szechuan Palace.
leonard: Szechuan Palace closed two years ago.
sheldon: What? Where did my cashew chicken come from?
leonard: Golden Dragon.
sheldon: No! No, this isn't right. No, our food always comes in Szechuan Palace containers.
leonard: Yeah, well, before they went out of business I bought four thousand containers. I keep them in the trunk of my car.
sheldon: But- Oh, this changes everything.
leonard [to Penny]: I thought that might take his mind off the cushion.
sheldon: What's real? What isn't? How can I know?
2.17 The Terminator Decoupling
Only Meemaw!!!
Runner Up: Hi. I'm the small package good things come in.
penny: Okay, I got a box, but there's no key in here. Just letters.
sheldon: That's the wrong box, put it back.
penny: Oh, Sheldon. Are these letters from your grandmother?
sheldon: Don't read those letters!
penny: Oh, look, she calls you Moonpie. That is so cute!
sheldon: PUT DOWN THE LETTERS!!!
leonard: [Takes the phone from Sheldon.] Hey, Penny, it's Leonard.
penny: Hey, Leonard. How's the train ride?
leonard: Delightful. Listen, I don't know what you're doing right now, but there are little bubbles forming in the corner of Sheldon's mouth.
penny: Okay, yeah, I kinda crossed a line. Put him back on.
leonard: Thank you. [Hands the phone back to Sheldon.]
sheldon: I'm back.
penny: What up, Moonpie?
sheldon: No one calls me Moonpie but Meemaw!
2.18 The Work Song Nanocluster
Sheldon and Penny Making Penny Blossoms
Runner Up: Zoom, zoom! ZOOM ZOOM ZOOM!!!
sheldon: I'm a deep water sailor just come from Hong Kong
penny&sheldon: To my way, hey, blow the man down
sheldon: If you'll give me some whiskey, I'll sing you a song
penny&sheldon: Give me some time to blow the man down
leonard: Hello?
penny&sheldon: Hello.
penny&sheldon: To my way, hey, blow the man down
sheldon: Or I'll help you along with the toe of my boot
penny&sheldon: Give me some time to blow the man down
leonard: What's going on?
sheldon: I assume you're referring to the sea shanty. That's a rhythmic work song designed to increase productivity.
penny: Yeah, it's crazy, but it totally works. Look! We made this Penny Blossom in under three minutes.
leonard: Terrific, but that kinda raises more questions than it answers.
2.19 The Dead Hooker Juxtaposition
Penny Throws Down with the Dead Hooker
Runner Up: It's a trap!
penny: Well, you know, it's just that Leonard and Howard and Raj, they aren't like other guys. They're special.
elisha: Okay, they're special. And?
penny: Let's see, how can I explain this? They don't know how to use their shields.
elisha: Shields?
penny: Yeah, you know, like in Star Trek when you're in battle and you raise the shields. ...where the hell'd that come from? Anyways, you know how guys like this are, so please don't take advantage of them.
elisha: Who says I'm taking advantage of them?
penny: Come on. They're doing everything for you because you're leading them on.
elisha: So I let them do stuff for me. They're happy, I get stuff, who cares? And how's it any different from what you do?
penny: Excuse me?
elisha: I've seen you around them, are you pretending like you don't do the exact same thing?
penny: Okay, lady. You are way out of line.
elisha: Oh, I'm out of line?
penny: Yeah. You're outta line.
elisha: Well. What're you gonna do about it, bitch?
2.20 The Hofstadter Isotope
Better Watch That Tone, Stuart
Runner Up: I'm a falcon who hunts better solo.
stuart: I'm sorry, but you're obviously stuck in a pre-Zero Hour DC universe.
sheldon: Of course I am! Removing Joe Chill as the killer of Batman's parents effectively deprived him of his raison d'etre.
stuart: Okay, you can throw all the french around you want, it doesn't make you right.
sheldon: Au contraire.
stuart: Plus, you're forgetting that the Infinite Crisis storyline restored Joe Chill to the Batman mythology!
sheldon: I am forgetting nothing and I resent your tone.
stuart: Okay, look, Sheldon, it's late. I've gotta get some sleep.
sheldon: So I win.
stuart: No! I'm tired.
sheldon: So I win.
stuart: Fine, you win.
sheldon: Darn tootin', I win.
2.21 The Vegas Renormalization
Jewish Girlfriend Experience
Runner Up: Sure! Why not?! And after the sun goes down, we can all pile in my pick-up and go skinny dippin' down at the crick, because today's the day to stop making sense!
raj: Hello, again.
mikayla: Oh, hi.
leonard: Yeah, hi, listen. If you're not busy, we were thinking maybe you could... We were wondering-
raj: If you're really a prostitute.
mikayla: You guys cops?
leonard:&raj: No.
mikayla: I'm a prostitute.
leonard Okay, great! Um... The thing is, we've got this friend and he's kind of down in the dumps and we thought maybe you could cheer him up.
raj: With sex.
leonard: I think she knows what I meant.
raj: How can she when you beat around the bush?! She's from the mean streets where they shoot from the hip and keep it real.
mikayla: Don't worry, I can take good care of your friend.
leonard: Okay, terrific. Listen, is there a way that we can do this where he doesn't know that you're a... you know.
raj: Prostitute.
mikayla: You want the girlfriend experience.
leonard: Yes, yeah, exactly. The girlfriend experience.
raj: Actually, if it's not too much to ask, could we have the Jewish girlfriend experience?
2.22 The Classified Materials Turbulence
Anarchy! Is That What You Want, Leonard?!
Runner Up: For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. Leonard pretends to be a friend and acts like a two faced bitch. Therefore, he's reborn as a banana slug.
leonard: [Leonard's cell rings. He checks the caller ID and then ignores it.] Oh, Stuart.
sheldon: You're not going to answer it?
leonard: He wants to talk about Penny. I don't want to talk about Penny.
sheldon: You're making an assumption. Perhaps the comic book store is on fire and he needs your assistance.
leonard: Why would he call me?
sheldon: We don't know. And if you don't answer the phone, we can't know.
leonard: I'm not answering the phone, Sheldon.
sheldon: Answer the phone, Leonard.
leonard: No! [His phone makes a new alert sound.] There. It went to voicemail.
sheldon: ...Aren't you going to check your messages?
leonard: No.
sheldon: You have to check your messages, Leonard! The leaving of a message is one half of a social contract, which is completed by the checking of the message. If that contract breaks down, then all social contracts break down and we descend into anarchy.
leonard: It must be hell inside your head.
2.23 The Monopolar Expedition
Tools of Leadership: Common Sense Sold Separately
Runner Up: Penny gifts Leonard with a snuggie. The two of them are a little bit adorable. Also, I want a snuggie.
sheldon: Gentleman, use your imagination! Innovate! Did Han Solo let Luke Skywalker freeze to death on the ice planet of Hoth? No! He cut open a Tauntaun and used its internal body heat to warm him up.
howard: You heard the man. Hold him down and I'll cut him open.
leonard: Hang on! I know I don't possess the 'tools of leadership', but I don't understand why we can't assemble the equipment inside the hut and then take it outside.
sheldon: I hadn't thought of that. I guess we're done here.
Yay! I'm glad this is finally posted. I'm filling a couple of topics in this month's challenge, but this is definitely the one I'm most proud of, so I hope you like it!
Also, make sure to check out the picspam of my challenge brain twin, maelyng, here!
credits:
-Font: Walkway Rounded
-Screencaps all taken and colored by me.
-Journey MP3 uploaded by me.
Did you like? Leave a comment! :D
Please do not use for anything without credit. ♥
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