The other night, during my lunch break, I was standing in line behind a couple that looked like they were in their mid-20s. They both gave me a weird look, which I'm used to when I actually take the time to form 4-inch spikes on my head with hair gel and traces of my own semen, so I reacted how I normally do and attempted to seem less imposing by ( Read more... )

You know you're getting a bit loose in the head when you're ecstatic that you have just barely avoided getting mauled to death on two separate occasions in the period of about 10 minutes.

Of course, informational sources you'll find on javelinas are dry, and usually ignorant towards the danger. I only encountered five or six of them in the dark ( Read more... )

What was I talking about? Oh, yes, moths ( Read more... )

Metalocalypse: Proof enough that if there is a God, he makes cartoons. And damn spanky good ones, at that.

Am I the only one who wishes like fuck that there was an actual album I could buy from this band?

Edit: I've only gone 36 hours with one hour of sleep, and already I'm doing stupid shit like trying to absorb the life-force from the plants ( Read more... )

What happened to sunny Tucson, home of the most beautiful sunsets this side of Heaven? What of fire piercing the pale blue of the horizon with life where once was Nothing? Where has the spirit of it breathed out, into freedom from my perceptions ( Read more... )

Someone who newly began stalking me on MySpace (and why I continue to leave my account up is beyond me...save for the attention-whoring, of course) sent me their first message and made the mistake of asking me, "How are you?"

( My reply. )

"Now. Serving. C048."It's soothing, almost. The voice flows as smoothly as the wind lilting through a shimmering green prairie, the warmly suggestive ebbs and flows shining as landlocked emerald waves in an endless sea of openness. It's deep, reflective, and bright just like a gem, but just like a gem its consistent symmetrical beauty belies an ( Read more... )

Last night, at work, I saw a cricket.

That is all.

My sister has convinced me to partake in the ritual of imbibing alcohol's various, colorful forms in the capacity of my stead at her place of habitation. As such, I can clearly write off any and all acts of impropriety and chauvinism while deep within the spell of the mistress muse of alcohol ( Read more... )

Two things of note happened at work last night. (I know, two work-related posts in a row. I must be one of those people. Since I'm so mind-crushingly dull [lol foreshadowing], you may as well skip this and continue reading about whatever else litters your gravitas-saturated friends page. Then I'd have a valid excuse to hunt you down, ensnare ( Read more... )