2015 LuRe Yule Challenge: Not enough.

[parishs]

Yule 2015 challenge: Not enough
Written by: Parishs
Rating: pg-13
Summary: Reid doesn't want to be alone for New Years Eve (Reid's POV).
Disclaimer: I own nothing

Thanks to zzzfreckles (Pamela) for the beta!!!

"Hello, this is pretty ass they come, may I help you?

"...........".

"Hello, is someone there? Can I help you sir? Don't be shy".

"I don't know why I am calling this number really".

"Yes you do, you are lonely at New Year’s Eve and you want to share it with someone, that's pretty natural. First times are always scary right, so tell me what you want. I have to warn you that we don't have much choice on such short notice but if you tell me your preferences I will look in my database".

Yes, database was a word he knew, but other than that he had no idea about preferences. He didn't want a guy with a huge....cock or a very muscular torso. Not a bodybuilder but...he had no idea.

"How do you know it's my first time with you?", he asked, postponing the real talk about superficial things as hair color or accent or whatever the guy wanted to ask.

"Our system doesn't recognize your caller-ID so we know you are new here and we want to satisfy our costumers so they will call us back. Nothing you want is weird here mister, so say what gets your champagne flowing so to speak".

Reid had never had a conversation like this in his life and it made that he felt like a nerd. He didn't think of champagne flowing, it actually made that he wanted to end the conversation because he realized that he would be very boring for the guy that was going to visit him.

"Hello? Are you still there? Sorry if my vocabulary upsets you, this is my merchandize voice but I get the feeling that it doesn't suit you. So tell me, mister....".

"Reid, just Reid", he said and could bit his tongue off by telling his real name, maybe in this alter universe people didn't say that, only aliases, he had no idea.

"Okay Reid, I am Edward. You want to spend this special evening with a guy. What do you have in mind, just sex or someone to toast with at midnight?

That voice, he was so nice and understanding although it was only work for him of course, cold hard cash, but he got Reid on a sort of dream about how the night could be.

"I don't know if I feel comfortable with someone I don't know", he confessed suddenly and slapped his head figurarly because of this stupid confession.

"Have you ever had one-night-stands?", the voice asked.

"Yes I have, at conferences I have had my share of that", he said.

"So you are away a lot, business-related?".

"Yes I am, not that I like it much, I am at my best if I am in the operating room but my colleagues suck me away from my work and ask if I want to tell about my operating techniques".

"Then you must be very skilled".

"I am the best".

A hard laugh on the other end of the phone startled him. "You don't believe in modesty do you?", Edward asked.

"It's overrated, do you think that it sounded wrong?".

"I am not to judge you Reid, it's just that most people are proud of their work but they don't say it out loud".

"Are you proud of your work?", Reid asked before he could swallow the words back.

"Yes I am; I have built a nice business in which I have guys working who love their jobs. They get paid well and the costumers are always satisfied, what more do you want in a company?".

"Do you work as a .......".

"I have but since I have inherited the company of my .....father I don't have time and to be honest it would be weird if I got hired by people I meet on the CEO table the next day so no, I don't do it anymore".

"But you liked it; to go to a guy you didn't know and have sex with him".

"It sounds like you have a problem with that. I see it this way: I look kinda nice, I love sex and if you can earn your money with it, why not?

"Did you have a rough youth? Are you abused? Why would you do this to yourself?".

"No and no, I have a warm family and they know what I do for a living. I am proud of my work. You are the best at the operating table, right? And since you don't believe in modesty, I think I am one of the best in bed or on the kitchen table or in the garden. I could make your world turn and you would be calling me every day".

"So, about that, eehh, what are the costs? I have no idea how this works, do I have to pay in advance?

"You pay per hour, its 250 and if you have special requests it's more, like SM or a threesome".

Reid whistled between his teeth. "That's ridiculous", he said. "I am a world class neurosurgeon and I don't even get 100 an hour. Why is it so expensive?

Edward laughed hard again. "Maybe you need to look at our website first, the rules and prices are on it and you can see the pictures of the guys that are available tonight. You can also see their specialty".

"Like what? I just want.....". Now who was superficial? And what did he want? Why was he always so sure about everything he wanted and now Edward must think that he was an idiot?

"Sex, say it, sex is nice and everyone has it so it's not something to be ashamed of. Now I want you to close your eyes and think of being with a guy you think is hot. He rings your doorbell and you open the door and there he is. You invite him inside and you check him out. He opens the champagne and you get the glasses and after you have toasted you......feel free to finish the sentence".

"But I don't have champagne; I only have beer in the fridge".

That laugh again, so warm and genuine, he didn't even mind if the guy was laughing at him, he got warm thinking about the guy on the phone. If only he could fantasize, but his analytical brain wasn't able to. He had to see it, like in porn, but the stories in those films were always so stupid that it distracted him from getting really aroused.

"The guy who is going to visit you brings champagne, so don't worry, he is not a visitor you need to entertain, he knows how to get you in the mood. Now close your eyes and tell me what you see when you are holding you bubbles and look at a nice guy in front of you, what do you want him to do?

Although Reid wanted to object because he couldn't see anything when he closed his eyes he didn't say it, he just did what the voice said. "Are you always this bossy?", he asked while he tried to imagine a guy standing in front of him.

"You are so funny! Yes maybe I am, but I am also the king of adjusting so if you need me submissive I can do that too. If only I get a clue about what you like than I am yours".

"But you said you don't whore yourself anymore".

"Well Reid, you are a special man, no one gets me speechless but you do. Let me tell you this, I think you need to reconsider having a man in your home. You would have my employees running out of the house in no time because they would think that you are rude and condescending. I can't have that. I am proud of my work and so are my guys. You call us Reid so you need to show me some respect".

Reid sighed. He did it again, he thought he used the right terms but someone misunderstood him, it happened all the time. In the OR they all spoke the same language but outside the sterile room he was socially awkward. Everyone who knew him knew that so they forgave him. If only he knew what he said wrong?

"Yeah maybe you are right, I am sorry if I offended you, it's the way I am. But except from the preposterous hour-price I respect you. So again I am sorry for my words and I am wishing you a happy new year".

"Don't get me wrong Reid, I can handle your insolence because I get you and I think you are hilarious, but I need to think of the guys I am sending away, they won't understand you. You know what? Maybe I need to make an exception for you and whore myself tonight. We have talked for a while now, right, so you know me a little already, maybe that helps to relax".

"Why is a successful man like you alone on a night like this?", Reid asked.

"Sorry, that counts as personal and I can't talk to you about it. We all have our private area Reid, you can't talk about your patients and I don't talk about my own life".

"But you are willing to share the most private areas with others", Reid said laughing.

"Maybe you see it that way but my body is not who I am. I can give you my body but you won't know what is making me happy or sad. I am so much more than what you see".

"That's philosophical! And of course I know that I’m a neuro surgeon; I see every day that the brain is what's making you, you. But maybe that's the case; maybe I don't want a guy in my house that plays a role".

"Maybe you just want someone who touches your skin and kisses your neck", the voice said softly.

Reid could only close his eyes and lay down on the wave of want the guy created. Yes he needed hands on his body and he wanted hands to massage his aching neck; he craved for the voice to keep talking, the guy knew what he wanted to hear, a man who slowly unbuttons your shirt and bites your nipple softly".

So many thoughts about being ticklish and having sensitive nipples but he couldn't say it anymore, he felt his body getting warm and his pulse rise. His address escaped his mouth in a sigh.

**********************************

I was glad when I saw the black Audi turning into the parking lot. I needed the voice to go on, I wanted to stay in the flow the guy created, the horny state I hadn't been in for ages. I peeked through the curtains and saw a guy walking toward the door of the apartment building; he had a briefcase in his hand. While looking on the security-screen I opened the door and told the guy my house number through the intercom.

The guy looked nice; professional with his suit and backward combed hair. I opened my own door and waited. The guy walked the stairs instead of taking the elevator, which was kind of weird. Of course he would be in great physical shape so maybe he needed the work out or maybe he was as scared of elevators as I was. I could ask the guy but on the other hand...it didn't matter why he took the stairs, he came here to please me, to have sex with me. He made an exception for me because he didn't trust me with his employees.

The guy didn't even pant when he stood before me. He was just a bit taller than I was and he smelled manly but fresh. Did he shower before he came here?

"Hey Reid he said, so natural as if we’d known each other for years. Maybe that was why I told him my address, Edward made me feel safe, warm, it seemed like he wanted to be with me as much as I wanted him here. He mesmerized me with his eyes, so brown with a hint of a smile.

"Can I come in, he asked?

Of course, it was rude to stare. I let him pass and closed the door behind him. Why did he do this, he had no idea what the guy he was going to visit would do to him. I could murder him or hurt him; he had no idea what my intentions were.

He walked to the window and opened the curtains a little to admire the view. Or maybe he did that so I could admire his ass. I didn't complain because what I was looking at was worth every dollar he asked of me. I walked to him and stepped into his personal space. My arms embarrassed him and all I wanted to do was kiss his neck.

"Can I kiss you, I sighed?

"You can do whatever you want Reid; the non-kissing rule is so weird, as if kissing is more intimate than sucking someone's cock. I want you to do what you feel is right as long as I can toast with you at midnight".

I nuzzled my nose in his hair and felt my blood flowing through my veins while I inhaled his scent. I felt so blessed that this gorgeous guy would spend some time with me. His words were an invitation to do whatever I needed and right now I wanted him to feel what he evoked in me so I pushed my erection against his ass.

He didn't sigh but moved his body slowly against mine. The power he gave me was so overwhelming that for a second I froze. I could do whatever I wanted with him but .....

"Don't overthink this Reid", he said softly. "You know what you like, listen to your body for once. I love your smell, you know that? And I want to feel your hard cock against me; you make me feel so welcome".

I turned out the lights and opened the curtains a bit more. While we were looking at the beautiful fireworks outside I kissed his neck again. He turned around a little so I could kiss his lips. I tasted peppermint on his tongue. While he seduced me slowly with his body I let go of my inhibition and started to touch him. Gone were the worries about the fact that I had to pay him or that so many others had touched him, he was mine for now. He made me feel special and anticipated on my moves. He sucked my cock like no one had done before with a passion that made me dizzy. And without telling him he knew that I needed him to own me after that. It was scary how well he got my hidden fantasies.

Later, at midnight, we lay together in bed with a glass of champagne in our hands and looked outside. "Happy New Year", he said and kissed me.

"You have made my year already perfect Edward", I said and kissed him back. "I hope you will have a wonderful year. I hope I can call you again, once in a while".

Edward looked outside and drank his bubbles. "You know why I came here? Because I felt so sorry for you, you called me without an idea about what you wanted. I couldn't let you be alone this night. But I am retired Reid, I am too busy to do this and beside that I am worried that you will develop feelings for me and I don't want that anymore".

"You want to spend the rest of your life alone?", I asked.

"That sounds wonderful", he said softly.

"But you and I; I thought it was good, don't you want that, someone who drinks a glass with you?

Edward sighed. "Maybe I am weird Reid but no, I don't want that, I want peace and quiet after my day is done. Sitting behind the telephone in the weekends is fine but I don't want to adjust to guys anymore. You know, the business is changing, guys expect more than before, you need to be shaved and in shape but I want to have a good meal at my grandmother’s house without worrying about my weight. Beside that guys get more and more aggressive because of the porn they are watching, they think they can slap me or order me around and I can't handle that. You were so hesitant that I knew you were different. Hell you don't even shave; you must be the last guy in Oakdale with pubic hair".

I frowned. "Really?", I asked. "But why should I shave it? And maybe you think I am a charity case but I don't mind, you really have changed something in me. I was like you, I wanted to be alone after a hard day’s work but it's lonely. Saying that out loud is strange but it's true, I am enjoying this chat with you, and the sex...I haven't had sex in ages. I am going to ask you next New Year’s Eve when you haven't had sex in a year if you miss it".

Edward laughed and looked at me; Reid he said, I have had more sex than the people in this building together and I have done everything with everyone and I know I am too easy but now it's my time to get my body back and I want it to be mine again so I can use it the way I like it.

I sighed. "You are retired at...how old are you? 25? You just crawled out of the egg and have enough money to last a lifetime. What are you going to do until you die? Work in your garden? It’s such a shame that you don't use the skills you have, but that's just me.

But to be honest, you are right, I understand it that you don't want to live up to expectations anymore, that's one of the hardest things to do and the reward is lousy. And you are right about another thing.... ".

"You will get feelings for me".

"Yes".

"I felt that Reid, am I am so sorry that I can't answer them. You are a great guy and we have a click but I can't have that in my life".

"That's a pity but to be honest I don't have time to be with someone, I come home at night and when I want to go to bed my beeper goes off and I have to go again. I don't have a social life and on top of that, I am not a social person so this is better. You gave me a night I can think of; when I’m tired".

"I have tried to read the article you wrote but I didn't even understand the title", Edward admitted.

"You searched me on Google?", I asked astonished.

"Of course, we always do a background check before we go to a new client; I want to get back home after I have done my magic. We have a modern system in which we can see everything, even police files".

"But you didn't know my name".

"I knew your first name was Reid and you were a neuro surgeon, how many are there in Oakdale? And if I couldn't find it you would have lied and then I would have called you that I couldn't come. But I was pretty sure that you weren't lying, I don't think you can".

"And what am I going to find when I Google you?", I asked.

"Everything about my shipping business", he said. "It's a rather nice website in which you get a tour through our ships and see how everyday life on board is".

"That's something very different", I said.

"Yes it is, and to be honest I hate it, I inherited it from my family but it's not who I am, it's not my world. But my ....dad asked me to look after it so I do, but I have a few great trouble shooters who do the daily work so I only have to be at the office now and then.

But I want to thank you for your kindness; you thought that I was 25 and that’s a great compliment, coming from you".

I frowned. "But I never make compliments", I said.

That laugh again, I put it in my memory banks for sad times. "I know so when you think that you really mean it, you don't want to kiss my ass to get me to do something. I am older than you Reid, and I am not a natural blond. Nothing you see is natural so you get it that I am sick and tired of keeping this image up".

I was stunned. "Then I am glad I have been the last person who could enjoy this version of you", I said and shook my head when I realized what I meant. "Sorry, I don't want to sound like a pervert but you are gorgeous. And it's the outside I like but what I like more is your inside, the snarky remarks you make and the way you get me, no one understands the way I talk, they all get insulted. You don't take things I say personal and that's nice for once".

"Then all the people you work with are fools", Edward said and poured us another glass of champagne. "Do you mind if I stay tonight, I am already tipsy, I didn't eat so the bubbles are totally making me dizzy"?

My heart jumped but I couldn't help myself. "How much is that going to cost me?", I asked.

"You know what, don't get all Pretty woman on me but since you are my last I won't charge you anything. I am having a great time and I am not able to drive so this one is on the house".

A smile was slowly forming on my face. "I don't know who Pretty woman is but I like it, thank you. Then I can put the money I had to pay you in my foundation".

"You have a foundation, he asked?

"Yes; I have and I donate all the money I don't use in it so this 1000 dollars go to people who need my help".

"You are financing that of your own money, he asked curiously?

"Yes; what's wrong with that, I asked?

"I’m going to tell you but not now; I am in a rather nice flow and I want to lie in this wonderful bed of yours but remind me to give you some tips before I go".

************************************************

When my beeper went off I cursed. I wasn't on call so I knew that there had been an accident with head trauma. I turned around and kissed the arm of the guy who woke up slowly.

"You have to go?", he asked softly.

"Yes sorry, I think that they need help, I was supposed to be free but obviously they can't handle the situation. Just close the door behind you when you go. I am sorry that I don't have much to eat".

Edward turned around and looked at me. "Drive safely", he said.

I looked at him one more time and nodded. "I will, thanks for a wonderful night".

When I came home he was gone, of course he was, but in the back of my head I fantasized that he was still laying in my bed just oozing sex. It could have been a dream, so unreal was the whole situation but it wasn't, he had left my duvet in a heap and his wet towel on the floor. That were things I would never do.

When I walked into the living room I smelled something. On the table were fresh croissants and orange juice, where did he get that on the first day of January in Oakdale? All the shops were closed. I sat down and ate the little French bread thinking of him. What if he was still here with me, laughing like only he could? Would I make a remark about the towel on the floor or would I swallow my irritation and take him in my arms again? Would he mind?

Then I saw a note on the kitchen isle: "Hey Reid, I had to go but thanks for a last time to think back on with a smile on my face. I think you are a great person. I have thought about this all night and maybe I am stupid but I am giving you my telephone number. Know that no one but my family has that. It means that I trust you and that I know you get it that I need my own life and can't have sex with you anymore. I know you can separate business from pleasure, and that's what I can offer you, my business skills and network. You need to step up with your foundation and I can help you with that. I Googled it but there's nothing about a foundation on the internet, so that means that you put your own money in an account and ....what? Call me if you need help. Luke.".

Luke? I thought his name was Edward. I sat down and read the note over and over again. He wanted to help me but he couldn't, he was the last person I needed to help me with the foundation. He saw right through me last night and that complicated everything: I was falling for him. I could not call him Luke and I didn't want to have business meetings with him. Thinking about having him close but not close enough was worse than being alone.

So I grabbed my phone and opened a message: "Luke, I can't grab the hand you are offering me but thank you for making an exception for me in so many ways. No one has ever done something so nice for me. I really appreciate it but you were wrong about my ability to separate. I won't call you, but thanks again. I hope you will be happy. Reid".

When I pushed send I felt lost. I had cut the cord to a person I liked very much but I respected his wishes, more than I needed my own ones fulfilled.

I deviated from my normal patters that week. I didn't change my bed on Saturday because I wanted to smell his scent for as long as I could. I put his note on my bed table and read it a few times before I went to sleep. It made me sad but I had to see his handwriting and read his thoughts.

I even rented the DVD Pretty woman and I got it, what he said, I looked a lot like the man in the movie, metaphorically speaking of course. I had fallen for a whore, but Edward wasn't poor and I wasn't his way out. But I recognized the confusion of the guy in the movie, the moment when you realize that you want to catch a dream.

It was a good thing that I had a photographic memory so I could recall the best night of my life over and over again.

"Maybe you just want someone who touches your skin and kisses your neck". That sentence somehow had done it for me then and did it ever since. I wrapped myself in memories about him and me when I was alone. In a way I was disappointed that he didn't send me a message back but what could he have answered that would have made me happy? Only one thing: that he had changed his mind and wanted to see me again.

When I was at work I could concentrate but when I was free I was a mess. No one had ever had such an effect on me as he did. He made me doubt, about what I wanted from him. It was the sex that had been terrific but it was more, it was the easy way he interacted with me although he didn't know me, the way he lay in my bed and stayed although I had to leave, the way he got me breakfast. My house felt like a home with him, and now he was gone it was my house again but it was empty. I missed him. And that was exactly what he didn't want.

Would he even think of me? My life and our sex must have bored him to tears; I was so old-fashioned and dull.

So I worked harder than ever to keep my mind busy. There was no way out of this problem, and having a memory like I did I couldn't forget. And I didn't want to although it drove me crazy to think about him.

I became a speaker on a few conferences in the spring and I had my fair share of loose contacts in hotels but it only made things worse, the guys I brought with me were nice but the interactions were clumsy and forced. We had to talk before we went to work about what went where and it made me feel lost. How did I do it before I met him? Had this been my life? Somehow I couldn't remember anymore, my night with Edward, or Luke was my standard and no one could get to the point where we had been. It slowly became a curse, my dream night.

So when I was in LA I called a gigolo service. The guy on the phone was efficient but he got irritated when I didn't know what I wanted. In fact I didn't care what the guy looked like, as long as he was...like Edward. I tried to explain what I wanted and after a while the guy sighed and promised to send me a nice guy.

And he was, he was nice and handsome and he satisfied me but he was slick and efficient too, he made that I had my climaxes and after I had paid him he left. No kissing. No croissants. Not Edward.

It made me crankier than I usually was so I had to be sure not to take my frustration out on my staff, but it gave me migraines I didn't have had in years. So looking back I sometimes wished I had never met him. But that was only when I was exhausted.

I thought about his offer a lot and so often I was on the verge of calling him but I didn't want to, I knew that if I heard his voice I would miss him even more so I just spend my days in a haze, reading his note before I went to sleep. I was a wreck but I was also obsessed. I knew it but I didn't want to stop it.

And then, months after I had called Edward, I got a call from someone I didn't know. He was a financial expert and offered to help me with my foundation. I had no idea what to think of it and was suspicious: what if the guy wanted to get my money? We mailed a lot and I asked him how he got my number. He said that Luke gave it to him.

Luke. I couldn't get used to that name although it fitted him so much more than Edward. I needed help with my fund so I had to make a move and do something I swore I would never do: I send a message to Luke: "Hey, I got a call from someone to help me with my fund, did you send him? Can I trust him?".

Before I could put my phone back into my pocket I got a reaction: "Hey Reid, I hope you don't mind that I interfere in your business but since you didn't want to call me I thought about helping you in another way. Steven is my accountant and he is the best I know. He can be trusted. Let him help you to get more money in the foundation, not just your own money. Talk to him and let him explain what the possibilities are. Maybe I can donate something as well. Hope everything is okay".

Why did he care? Why was he still thinking about me? My heart beat like a maniac in my frontal lobe and all I could do was smile. It didn't matter that I didn't hear his voice or that I couldn't look into his eyes, the fact that I was still on his mind was enough.

Sequel: Still not enough chapter 1