FIC: In the Arms of the Wicked, 32/36 (Don, Charlie/Colby, David, Megan/Larry, Liz, McGowan, PG-13)
Title: "Don't Look Back"
Series: In the Arms of the Wicked, Part 32/36
Characters: Don, Charlie/Colby, David, Megan/Larry, Liz, McGowan.
Rating: PG-13.
Spoilers: Season 5.
Warnings: None.
Summary: It's Don's time to go.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything (characters, situations, etcetera) except my OCs.
Beta: The fantastic twins_m0m and the great lillyg.
Previous chapters: Click here.
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32: Don't Look Back
The end of the case led to Don’s time to leave.
He’d known that it wouldn’t be easy, but he didn’t realize what it’d feel like until he sat down in the break room alone.
His coffee remained untouched; his body didn’t want to respond. He was thinking, almost to the point of meditating - remembering, missing everything already.
He felt stupid, wishing that he could turn back time and not go after Cameron, not track him down like a criminal, and not go to meet with him to try to save his brother.
Don rubbed his forehead. The truth was, if he could actually go back to the moment when everything had started, he’d do exactly the same. It’d turned out that what Charlie had said was right; Don was protective of him, which was fine until he messed up things and risked his job.
Besides, it was obvious that this time Charlie didn’t need to be saved.
Almost fifteen years working for the FBI, and this was what he got, a suspension as reward. Not that he hadn’t done anything to deserve punishment, but taking away his badge and gun seemed to be a bit over the top. Everyone would support him during the investigation process Carl was going to open. Everything would be all right.
Yes, he just had to see the bright side. Until he could go back to his job, he’d take time for himself. He’d do all the things he hadn’t been able to do for years, he’d enjoy the life he’d felt disappear because of his daily duties. He’d spend time with the family, he’d help his dad cook, he’d even do the laundry. It was okay; this suspension was just temporary.
Someone knocked on the door. Lifting his eyes from his coffee, Don saw Megan at the door. “Hey.”
“Hey,” she said, coming in. There was a shadow, an awkwardness in her eyes. When she sat down, she didn’t start talking right away; instead, she entwined her fingers and stared at the table.
Don frowned. “What?”
“You’re leaving.” Her eyes finally landed on him, worried.
He cocked his head, faked a smile. “C’mon. It’s not like you can’t do my job.”
“I don’t know.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’ve been thinking… The last case brought up some issues from my personal life.” For a moment, she stopped talking, took a deep breath, and looked down. “I hope you don’t mind that I don’t feel like sharing exactly what it is…”
She’d always been so private about her life before the FBI. She’d even gotten pissed off at a psychic because he’d seem to guess too much about her past. “No, that’s fine…”
“Well… I’m sure I’ll be able to handle this. I’m trying to keep my stress level down, and I think I’ve managed to do it for a couple of hours now, but I don’t know how long it’ll last.”
Slowly, he leaned over the table and put a hand on her shoulder. “If you ever want to talk, I’m here for you,” he said. “But I’m sure that, no matter what has happened, you’re strong and this will be easy for you. You’ll do a great job. There’s no one else I’d prefer to lead this team, all right?”
Their eyes met again. She nodded and he squeezed her shoulder gently. But it was time to keep going through the next stage of the process of leaving the only job he thought he’d been made to do, so he got up and grabbed his coffee.
On the way out, Larry asked him to stop. “Larry?”
The physicist joined his palms, starting his sentence a couple of times and then stopping to rephrase. After several attempts, he explained, “Agent McGowan and I just had a random encounter in the corridor and he asked me to bring you a message.”
Don took a guess. “He wants to talk to me.”
“Yes,” Larry responded awkwardly, and tapped his fingers against one another, not wanting to look at Don.
“It’s okay, Larry, you can say it.”
“Ah… It just doesn’t feel right to bring that new contribution to your current state of leaving the past behind and engaging yourself in a completely new routine…”
Larry’s awkwardness wouldn’t be missed at all. After all, he’d always visited Charlie, and Don would have the chance to see him there often. “Thanks,” Don said, patting the physicist’s shoulder, and he went out.
Before getting to McGowan's office, he remembered that he’d left his coffee back in the break room. But when he was about to reenter the break room, Larry and Megan’s conversation caught his attention. Their backs were towards him, so he could listen to them without them noticing.
“He’s frustrated behind those smiles, I can tell,” she said as she held Larry’s hand.
The words hit Don’s heart hard. He obviously couldn’t hide anything.
“I don’t blame him. Events that provoke a deviation in what we consider being the normal development of our daily life can be difficult to handle.”
Megan nodded. “I hope he comes back soon. To be honest, I don’t know if I’ll be able to keep up.”
He held her hands firmly. “Yes, you will. You’re a strong, intelligent, independent woman.”
“Well, that’s because I have a shelter to go back to,” she responded, and the let her forehead rest against his.
Sometimes, Don wished he could have someone to turn to, like what they had. He probably wouldn’t miss the ivory tower thing they shared, but he would like at least a taste of their faith in each other and their constant, mutual supportiveness.
He didn’t need the coffee. He didn’t want to interrupt the lovers' little moment. So Don walked back down the corridor, getting ready for whatever may come.
Open minded, he entered Carl’s office and flashes of the moment he’d broken into his computer with Amita’s help came back. Remembering that someone had interrupted their call, she’d probably gotten in trouble. However, right now, Don had more important things to do than worrying about her.
“Don,” Carl said very seriously as Don walked opened the door. Then Carl pointed at the chair beside his desk.
Don took the seat and sat down straight. “Carl.”
The older agent rubbed his palms slowly, Don following every caress. “You realize that the last case has come to an end.”
“Yeah, I do,” Don responded firmly. He’d have an answer for every punch.
“Then you know what to do. When you finish, tell your brother I want to see him, too.”
The India case tapes had resurfaced. He’d have to let it be this time. “Sure.” Focused, Don got up and walked towards the door. But before going through the threshold, he turned around. “Who knows? Maybe I’ll be lucky.” He was coming out when he heard Carl’s voice for the last time today.
“I think you will.”
As he walked out, he let himself smile at the irony of FBI jobs. Of course Carl had to follow his footsteps, do research on him, judge him, warn him, making him see what Don done wrong. It was what he’d been hired to. But that didn’t mean he didn’t have his own opinion on the matters he had in his hands.
Don’s desk seemed so empty after he cleared it from knickknacks and pens. He hadn’t brought many things there over the years, now that he noticed it. But he’d miss sitting here and looking at criminals’ profiles. He’d miss setting up operations, tying facts together and hearing Charlie talk about a kind of math he couldn’t understand. He’d miss being part of something big for a while.
It wasn’t like the memories were going to suddenly fade away, but maybe it was also the right moment to see what he could do besides work for the FBI. So Don got up and went to look for his brother, telling himself that everything that was happening would be for the best.
It wasn’t hard to find Charlie. He was near the elevator, standing there straight and serious - grey suit, shiny shoes. Leaving his box on his desk, Don approached him. “What’s with the looks, buddy?” He suddenly remembered what was going on. “Waiting for Colby, huh?”
His brother blushed at the comment and nodded, rubbing his hands.
“Look at you, you’re so nervous,” Don said, trying to laugh. “Why don’t you go down and wait for him there?”
“I think that would only make me more nervous,” Charlie answered, now rubbing the back of his head.
Don hated to have to ruin the wait. For a moment, he understood what Larry had said about delivering bad news. “Charlie… Carl wants to see you.”
Charlie looked up, his eyes widening. “The tapes?”
“I don’t know…” Don couldn’t lie. “I think so.” He saw his brother take a deep breath.
“Okay… Let’s see what he’s got to say.”
The way Charlie left his spot beside the elevator made Don very proud of him. Charlie was determined, focused to make his relationship with Colby worked. That was his brother; that was the Charlie Eppes Don knew.
He watched him walk to the corridor and then disappear. And that was when the elevator doors opened. “Hey!” Don greeted his agents - or former agents - when he turned around.
Smiling, Colby shook his hand. “Hi, Don.”
David came from behind him and offered his hand.
“Welcome home, guys,” Don said. “You both did a great job… Where’s Ian by the way?”
Colby looked at David, who glanced at him. “He decided to stay in Arizona for a while to rest from the ride that guy Farrow gave him. He refused to come with us… He must have a lot of work.”
“Yeah, but it’s still… weird,” Don said.
“Yeah, but you know he’s not much of a sharer.”
“I guess…”
“Anyway, we’ll work on the report as soon as possible,” Colby informed his boss.
But Don hadn’t told them yet. “Sure… but you’ll have to give it to Megan, she’s in charge now.”
Colby immediately laughed, and David snorted. However, when Megan and Larry came towards them, not looking exactly happy, all happiness erased from the partners’ faces.
“What? Isn’t that a joke?” Colby asked.
Larry bit his lip. “I’m afraid that the fun of the phrase was taken away by the power of reality.”
Shaking his head, David turned to his boss. “Don… You’re leaving?”
There was no answer.
“What happened?”
“He tracked EAD Cameron down…” Megan explained.
David definitely couldn’t believe what he’d heard. Stepping closer to Don, he said, “You did what?”
Looking perplexed, Colby seemed to be out of words. He lifted his hand, asking for a time out. “Nah, hold on a minute. That can’t be true. According to what we know, he was under Protective Custody, so you aren’t allowed to… Ah, but Charlie, David, the tapes…” He stopped talking and put his hands on his hips as he lowered his head. “Damn, Don.”
“Are you out of your mind, man?” David told Don, putting a hand on his shoulder. “I’m not talking about me and the tapes here. I’m talking about you and your job. Was that the plan you had, the one you told me about?”
Don remembered their conversation a few days ago when he’d told David that he had a plan. The fight the two of them had had seemed to have taken place a million years ago. “Yeah… I mean, I wanted to help but sometimes things just go wrong…” he said, trying to sound funny. But he didn’t get any laughs. Not even a little smile.
“What you did was crazy,” Colby muttered.
Overwhelmed, Don could only take a deep breath and try to take things easy. Confidently, he went to get the box he’d left on his desk. When he joined the rest again, he explained, “It was… but it’s too late to do anything about it,” he responded, a sad smile spreading over his lips.
It was time to say goodbye, at least at the office. He wouldn’t be allowed to come back for a while, he'd be banned from the cases. But he’d survive. “So… I think I should get going…” Don turned to Colby. “Maybe you should wait for Charlie, he’s talking to Carl and…”
The doors to the corridor opened, and Charlie was suddenly coming towards them. His steps were steady, his cheeks were red and his lips were tense. Don could see fire in his eyes. His brother seemed to be determined to do one thing and one thing only - uncover the truth.
Series: In the Arms of the Wicked, Part 32/36
Characters: Don, Charlie/Colby, David, Megan/Larry, Liz, McGowan.
Rating: PG-13.
Spoilers: Season 5.
Warnings: None.
Summary: It's Don's time to go.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything (characters, situations, etcetera) except my OCs.
Beta: The fantastic twins_m0m and the great lillyg.
Previous chapters: Click here.
Previous chapter
Next chapter
32: Don't Look Back
The end of the case led to Don’s time to leave.
He’d known that it wouldn’t be easy, but he didn’t realize what it’d feel like until he sat down in the break room alone.
His coffee remained untouched; his body didn’t want to respond. He was thinking, almost to the point of meditating - remembering, missing everything already.
He felt stupid, wishing that he could turn back time and not go after Cameron, not track him down like a criminal, and not go to meet with him to try to save his brother.
Don rubbed his forehead. The truth was, if he could actually go back to the moment when everything had started, he’d do exactly the same. It’d turned out that what Charlie had said was right; Don was protective of him, which was fine until he messed up things and risked his job.
Besides, it was obvious that this time Charlie didn’t need to be saved.
Almost fifteen years working for the FBI, and this was what he got, a suspension as reward. Not that he hadn’t done anything to deserve punishment, but taking away his badge and gun seemed to be a bit over the top. Everyone would support him during the investigation process Carl was going to open. Everything would be all right.
Yes, he just had to see the bright side. Until he could go back to his job, he’d take time for himself. He’d do all the things he hadn’t been able to do for years, he’d enjoy the life he’d felt disappear because of his daily duties. He’d spend time with the family, he’d help his dad cook, he’d even do the laundry. It was okay; this suspension was just temporary.
Someone knocked on the door. Lifting his eyes from his coffee, Don saw Megan at the door. “Hey.”
“Hey,” she said, coming in. There was a shadow, an awkwardness in her eyes. When she sat down, she didn’t start talking right away; instead, she entwined her fingers and stared at the table.
Don frowned. “What?”
“You’re leaving.” Her eyes finally landed on him, worried.
He cocked his head, faked a smile. “C’mon. It’s not like you can’t do my job.”
“I don’t know.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’ve been thinking… The last case brought up some issues from my personal life.” For a moment, she stopped talking, took a deep breath, and looked down. “I hope you don’t mind that I don’t feel like sharing exactly what it is…”
She’d always been so private about her life before the FBI. She’d even gotten pissed off at a psychic because he’d seem to guess too much about her past. “No, that’s fine…”
“Well… I’m sure I’ll be able to handle this. I’m trying to keep my stress level down, and I think I’ve managed to do it for a couple of hours now, but I don’t know how long it’ll last.”
Slowly, he leaned over the table and put a hand on her shoulder. “If you ever want to talk, I’m here for you,” he said. “But I’m sure that, no matter what has happened, you’re strong and this will be easy for you. You’ll do a great job. There’s no one else I’d prefer to lead this team, all right?”
Their eyes met again. She nodded and he squeezed her shoulder gently. But it was time to keep going through the next stage of the process of leaving the only job he thought he’d been made to do, so he got up and grabbed his coffee.
On the way out, Larry asked him to stop. “Larry?”
The physicist joined his palms, starting his sentence a couple of times and then stopping to rephrase. After several attempts, he explained, “Agent McGowan and I just had a random encounter in the corridor and he asked me to bring you a message.”
Don took a guess. “He wants to talk to me.”
“Yes,” Larry responded awkwardly, and tapped his fingers against one another, not wanting to look at Don.
“It’s okay, Larry, you can say it.”
“Ah… It just doesn’t feel right to bring that new contribution to your current state of leaving the past behind and engaging yourself in a completely new routine…”
Larry’s awkwardness wouldn’t be missed at all. After all, he’d always visited Charlie, and Don would have the chance to see him there often. “Thanks,” Don said, patting the physicist’s shoulder, and he went out.
Before getting to McGowan's office, he remembered that he’d left his coffee back in the break room. But when he was about to reenter the break room, Larry and Megan’s conversation caught his attention. Their backs were towards him, so he could listen to them without them noticing.
“He’s frustrated behind those smiles, I can tell,” she said as she held Larry’s hand.
The words hit Don’s heart hard. He obviously couldn’t hide anything.
“I don’t blame him. Events that provoke a deviation in what we consider being the normal development of our daily life can be difficult to handle.”
Megan nodded. “I hope he comes back soon. To be honest, I don’t know if I’ll be able to keep up.”
He held her hands firmly. “Yes, you will. You’re a strong, intelligent, independent woman.”
“Well, that’s because I have a shelter to go back to,” she responded, and the let her forehead rest against his.
Sometimes, Don wished he could have someone to turn to, like what they had. He probably wouldn’t miss the ivory tower thing they shared, but he would like at least a taste of their faith in each other and their constant, mutual supportiveness.
He didn’t need the coffee. He didn’t want to interrupt the lovers' little moment. So Don walked back down the corridor, getting ready for whatever may come.
Open minded, he entered Carl’s office and flashes of the moment he’d broken into his computer with Amita’s help came back. Remembering that someone had interrupted their call, she’d probably gotten in trouble. However, right now, Don had more important things to do than worrying about her.
“Don,” Carl said very seriously as Don walked opened the door. Then Carl pointed at the chair beside his desk.
Don took the seat and sat down straight. “Carl.”
The older agent rubbed his palms slowly, Don following every caress. “You realize that the last case has come to an end.”
“Yeah, I do,” Don responded firmly. He’d have an answer for every punch.
“Then you know what to do. When you finish, tell your brother I want to see him, too.”
The India case tapes had resurfaced. He’d have to let it be this time. “Sure.” Focused, Don got up and walked towards the door. But before going through the threshold, he turned around. “Who knows? Maybe I’ll be lucky.” He was coming out when he heard Carl’s voice for the last time today.
“I think you will.”
As he walked out, he let himself smile at the irony of FBI jobs. Of course Carl had to follow his footsteps, do research on him, judge him, warn him, making him see what Don done wrong. It was what he’d been hired to. But that didn’t mean he didn’t have his own opinion on the matters he had in his hands.
Don’s desk seemed so empty after he cleared it from knickknacks and pens. He hadn’t brought many things there over the years, now that he noticed it. But he’d miss sitting here and looking at criminals’ profiles. He’d miss setting up operations, tying facts together and hearing Charlie talk about a kind of math he couldn’t understand. He’d miss being part of something big for a while.
It wasn’t like the memories were going to suddenly fade away, but maybe it was also the right moment to see what he could do besides work for the FBI. So Don got up and went to look for his brother, telling himself that everything that was happening would be for the best.
It wasn’t hard to find Charlie. He was near the elevator, standing there straight and serious - grey suit, shiny shoes. Leaving his box on his desk, Don approached him. “What’s with the looks, buddy?” He suddenly remembered what was going on. “Waiting for Colby, huh?”
His brother blushed at the comment and nodded, rubbing his hands.
“Look at you, you’re so nervous,” Don said, trying to laugh. “Why don’t you go down and wait for him there?”
“I think that would only make me more nervous,” Charlie answered, now rubbing the back of his head.
Don hated to have to ruin the wait. For a moment, he understood what Larry had said about delivering bad news. “Charlie… Carl wants to see you.”
Charlie looked up, his eyes widening. “The tapes?”
“I don’t know…” Don couldn’t lie. “I think so.” He saw his brother take a deep breath.
“Okay… Let’s see what he’s got to say.”
The way Charlie left his spot beside the elevator made Don very proud of him. Charlie was determined, focused to make his relationship with Colby worked. That was his brother; that was the Charlie Eppes Don knew.
He watched him walk to the corridor and then disappear. And that was when the elevator doors opened. “Hey!” Don greeted his agents - or former agents - when he turned around.
Smiling, Colby shook his hand. “Hi, Don.”
David came from behind him and offered his hand.
“Welcome home, guys,” Don said. “You both did a great job… Where’s Ian by the way?”
Colby looked at David, who glanced at him. “He decided to stay in Arizona for a while to rest from the ride that guy Farrow gave him. He refused to come with us… He must have a lot of work.”
“Yeah, but it’s still… weird,” Don said.
“Yeah, but you know he’s not much of a sharer.”
“I guess…”
“Anyway, we’ll work on the report as soon as possible,” Colby informed his boss.
But Don hadn’t told them yet. “Sure… but you’ll have to give it to Megan, she’s in charge now.”
Colby immediately laughed, and David snorted. However, when Megan and Larry came towards them, not looking exactly happy, all happiness erased from the partners’ faces.
“What? Isn’t that a joke?” Colby asked.
Larry bit his lip. “I’m afraid that the fun of the phrase was taken away by the power of reality.”
Shaking his head, David turned to his boss. “Don… You’re leaving?”
There was no answer.
“What happened?”
“He tracked EAD Cameron down…” Megan explained.
David definitely couldn’t believe what he’d heard. Stepping closer to Don, he said, “You did what?”
Looking perplexed, Colby seemed to be out of words. He lifted his hand, asking for a time out. “Nah, hold on a minute. That can’t be true. According to what we know, he was under Protective Custody, so you aren’t allowed to… Ah, but Charlie, David, the tapes…” He stopped talking and put his hands on his hips as he lowered his head. “Damn, Don.”
“Are you out of your mind, man?” David told Don, putting a hand on his shoulder. “I’m not talking about me and the tapes here. I’m talking about you and your job. Was that the plan you had, the one you told me about?”
Don remembered their conversation a few days ago when he’d told David that he had a plan. The fight the two of them had had seemed to have taken place a million years ago. “Yeah… I mean, I wanted to help but sometimes things just go wrong…” he said, trying to sound funny. But he didn’t get any laughs. Not even a little smile.
“What you did was crazy,” Colby muttered.
Overwhelmed, Don could only take a deep breath and try to take things easy. Confidently, he went to get the box he’d left on his desk. When he joined the rest again, he explained, “It was… but it’s too late to do anything about it,” he responded, a sad smile spreading over his lips.
It was time to say goodbye, at least at the office. He wouldn’t be allowed to come back for a while, he'd be banned from the cases. But he’d survive. “So… I think I should get going…” Don turned to Colby. “Maybe you should wait for Charlie, he’s talking to Carl and…”
The doors to the corridor opened, and Charlie was suddenly coming towards them. His steps were steady, his cheeks were red and his lips were tense. Don could see fire in his eyes. His brother seemed to be determined to do one thing and one thing only - uncover the truth.