.003 | Video.

[paradoxlol]

[This is Arthur. This is Arthur leaning against a closet door, his suit slightly rumpled (in fact, there's a tear in one of his sleeves), his hair out of place. Still, he carries himself like this is PERFECTLY NORMAL. Oh yeah, and he's holding a pool cue. Before he speaks, Arthur smooths his hair back.]To the library staff: sorry. I left a few

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PSEUDOSPAM

[girlenoughforu]

[THUMP THUMP WHAM.]

I'M GOING TO KICK YOUR BALLS UP YOUR ASS.

PSEUDOSPAM

[paradoxlol]

[PFFTH.]

If I recall correctly? You already tried that.

PSEUDOSPAM

[girlenoughforu]

[PAUSING FOR A SECOND TO CATCH HER BREATH.]

I'll aim this time. [THUD. And this is a HEROIC DEMAND:] Where's D'Amico?

PSEUDOSPAM

[paradoxlol]

[FINALLY, SOME TINY PROGRESS-- oh wait she's banging against the door again.]

I don't know any "D'Amico". Who is he?

[empirical_data]

[Data likes kids, what did you do, Arthur?! Hey, she's Martha's height] I know of few parents on board and their children did not accompany them. ...Why is she in your closet? As well as apparently livid?

[paradoxlol]

This isn't my closet. And she's in it because I don't have anything to restrain her with. [He holds up the pool cue.] She came at me with this.

[empirical_data]

[Obviously not your normal little girl.] I am beginning to think a pool table was perhaps not the best game to include on this particular vessel. May I speak to her if other attempts to convince her to remain calm have failed?

[paradoxlol]

I know. The cues should at least be locked up in an environment like this.

Be my guest.

[doctor_j_crane]

A small girl was looking for her father in the garden. I had assumed that it was one of the Admiral's mind games.

[paradoxlol]

Did she attack you?

Assuming no. :3

[doctor_j_crane]

No. She did destroy some plants.

Video.

[you_run_i_chase]

[Hello suit man, have a suit woman!]

You have got to be fucking kidding me. A twelve year old? Here?

Is there a flood I don't know about?

Video.

[paradoxlol]

I don't think so. We just had one, and I was under the impression they were spaced out.

Video.

[you_run_i_chase]

You know, locking someone in the closet doesn't really fucking make them calm down.

Video.

[paradoxlol]

Thanks, I had no idea.

[christ_onabike]

...A fucking kid?

Jesus fucking Christ.

Did you put her in that closet? Or is that someone else swearing their ass off at you?

[paradoxlol]

[He looks at the door again.] She's in the closet. It seems to be the only way we can talk civilly.

[christ_onabike]

That's the only way you can be civil with a twelve year old?

[paradoxlol]

That's the only way I can get a sentence in without her punching me in the face. [Or the balls. He's really not happy about that.]