[thread]

[hadtoleave]

Who: Squall and Selphie.
What: Resolution of Epic Fight II-or something like it.
When: Middle of very early morning, a while after this!
Where: Selphie's room if she lets him in.
Rating: PG-13 to be safe.

Comments

[anewlingo]

"Sorry," Selphie said, sounding like her usual self for a moment as she sniffed and looked away, wiping away whatever tears were in her eyes. The last few days had worn her out emotionally more than physically. She hated crying, and even now it was kind of difficult to get frustrated at that.

For all her love of explosions and fighting against monsters and bad guys, she didn't enjoy fighting Squall. "I do get it. Maybe not all of it, but a lot of it. But I don't wanna be pushed away, you know? I was scared, and you're the commander, and..." She wasn't going to start the blame game. She wiped at her eyes again. "You're my friend. We have to stick together, right? You can tell me to back off, but don't tell me to leave you alone."

She wondered if it was the last week of insanity that drove them to this point or if it was just building up for ten months, their little spats only a taste of what was to come.

[hadtoleave]

His hands ached and he wondered whether or not he unclenched them if he'd go to her. He didn't dare find out; he pressed harder until his knuckles paled.

"…All right," he said. He had turned away from her by then. "But I'm not the commander anymore." If they went home, maybe things would be different. But here the rules changed. Vastly. "I'm not a SeeD." He hadn't expected it to hurt by saying that, but it did. He lowered his head and closed his eyes, briefly grinding his teeth.

If he apologized now, would it be okay? It still didn't feel right between them and that would probably help. Was pride stopping him? He lifted his head and opened his eyes, but didn't face her. "…I'm not going anywhere."

That contradicted some of what he said. Why couldn't he do the same for what had really hurt her?

Maybe she'd really get it: Everyone disappoints you in the end.

[anewlingo]

Again, she bit her lip. She didn't think that. They were still SeeD. They were heroes, too. They had saved the world, and even if that didn't amount to much in Paradisa it didn't change the fact that it was a part of who they were.

"No? ... darn," Selphie said, a tiny little 'heh' following right after so it was obvious she was kidding. It was nice to hear. While she didn't exactly have abandonment issues, she didn't like the idea of Squall going away. But it wasn't something to worry about pointlessly. "I'm not going anywhere either." Sure... it would be nice to be home. To see everyone, and the old Squall. But she knew she would miss this one, now. She'd had nearly a year of memories with him--hadn't she said that, a long time ago? That she just had to make new memories with this Squall, and then they'd be friends.

She didn't really want to think about the two different Squalls. It hurt her head.

Exhaling, Selphie shifted in her seat. "I didn't mean what I said before, over at Seifer's." There. She'd said it.

[hadtoleave]

…Still SeeD. Always SeeD. In fact, it was the only part of him he could rely on. But he couldn't tell her that. It was better if she thought otherwise, especially in regards to him being commander. Though what was there to command? Selphie was good at what she did. So…

"Sorry to disappoint." Squall had control again and it was impossible to tell if he was being facetious or not. At her assurance, he only shrugged. It'd make him more uncomfortable to think about all of that again-or more than he was now. They had no way of knowing for sure. At least it wasn't a promise or anything; it had better not be one.

He wanted to look at her when she admitted it to try and see if she was being honest. He didn't need to; she probably was. And if she wasn't, so what? Anything to get through this, right? Yet somehow it only annoyed him. "…Oh?" he voiced levelly.

[anewlingo]

Squall would always be someone she looked up to. She didn't idolize him (that was Laguna) but she trusted him when it came to battle and other things. So that's why he was the commander, and nothing really changed that.

"Sometimes..." she began before thinking, and just decided to carry on, "It's better to get you angry. Because you censor yourself less, and actually say something." It wasn't another attack--just an opinion.

She felt a little awkward when he still wasn't looking at her. Did he not believe her?

"... yeah. I'm sorry, Squall."

... or did he not regret what he said about her?

[hadtoleave]

He was less than pleased to hear that, but he could recognize the validity of her statement. Except the question was, if that's what she wanted, why-?

"…" Squall quietly exhaled and uncurled his fists, ignoring the sting. "Well." …I'm supposed to say 'sorry,' too, right? He turned around to face her, face impassive as always. "If you weren't so damn obnoxious-"

Was he going to start another fight?

"-you wouldn't be you and I wouldn't…" He struggled to find the right word and what came out sounded so lame (and sincere) he thought he'd lost his mind. "…like you as much." It was hard not to cringe but he managed. He maintained eye contact, scowling, just daring her to say something.

[anewlingo]

Selphie was ready for him to yell again (though she did wonder what she had said this time) but it never came. Her shoulders relaxed a little, but she made an effort not to maintain eye contact. She felt guilty.

However, her lip did curve into a small smile at his comment. "And if you weren't so..." she gestured at him instead of saying some of her choice phrases from the other day, "You wouldn't be you and I wouldn't like you as much."

It sounded funny from Squall, but... he was trying, and that's what mattered.

She didn't get up, but she offered her hand. "Can we agree on no more fights like... this? Easier said than done, but..." They could try, and maybe try to talk it out like adults if things got bad. "Friends?"

[hadtoleave]

"Right." He licked his teeth and narrowed his eyes, wanting this over as quickly as possible. It didn't feel as emotionally choking in here but awkwardness wasn't much better.

"Like this?" He lifted an eyebrow and glanced at her hand. Well, at least she wasn't asking for another hug-though a very small part of him wondered at that, and he promptly squashed it. "…I have a choice?" He felt a wave of déjà vu and took her hand. He squeezed a little, slightly wincing at the pressure it put on the indentations his fingernails had left.

"Um." He let go. "…Sorry." He rolled his eyes. "Yeah. Friends. Whatever." He idly wondered if there was another side to all of this.

[anewlingo]

Selphie felt a little better, though a part of her was still concerned that this might not be the end of their fighting. However, she was relieved that they were being civil. Kind of. Well... she was being nice, at least.

"I don't mind little arguments, but things that make me cry aren't fun," Selphie answered. She then shrugged. "No, but it's nice to let you think that you do." She gave him a curious look as he squeezed her hand. "... I don't have cooties, you know."

There was that apology. She didn't say anything; simply shrugging again.

[hadtoleave]

"I didn't mean-you weren't-I wasn't trying to make you cry," Squall said obstinately and frowned. "Right." He folded his arms across his chest, missing his jacket or at least his gloves, and snapped, "I'm not five." Cooties? Give me a break.

He apologized and all he got was a shrug? "Well?" he impatiently prodded. That couldn't be it. That was what she'd said she wanted, damn it, and giving it to her didn't mean warrant more, like a thanks? For-"Whatever." He didn't care-absolutely did not-and didn't want to fight again, especially not this close to making up.

But still. A shrug? Wasn't that his job?