Team Brendon: A Calm Sea Does Not Make a Skilled Sailor

[danimpa]

Title: Treat Me Like The Sea, Oh-So Salty And Mean
Team: Team Brendon
Prompt: A Calm Sea Doesn't Make A Skilled Sailor
Rating: R
Pairing: Ryan/Brendon
Summary: An abusive father gets what he deserved, as well as a 'funny uncle'.
Warnings: Character death, violence, incest, rape, child abuse
Word count: 3029
Disclaimer: I claim no ownership of

Comments

[ivesia19]

I really enjoyed the close relationship that Spencer and Ryan had in this fic. It really showed their unique friendship very well.

[justhush]

I really don't know how to react to this.

I mean, first of all, this deals with a very touchy subject, and kudos to you for going for it, it was a brave move, and a bold on. I also think you handled it fairly well, it's just that. The ending? The ending is highly disturbing to me, and I don't want to offend you, and I'm not saying it's bad, but. George and Kevin are awful, awful people, but killing them like that? With no guilt what-so-ever from the boys, and no consequences is, just, upsetting to me. It's not justice.

Even though naturally I side with Ryan and Brendon --- they're our boys and they're the victims --- the fact that they can mercilessly kill another person, (even and evil person) just. It makes my stomach hurt and it makes me confused, because I don't know how to sympathize. I don't know with whom to sympathize.

I don't know. You might have been trying for that reaction? This story made me upset, for sure, but maybe not in the way you intended.

I also feel like you told me what happened, most of the time, which

[justranda]

I'm not sure where to start, to be quite honest.

While I like the fact that Spencer and Ryan maintained their close relationship, staying the best of friends, there were several other factors that drew me away from the story. I had to stop in the middle of the story to try and gather my thoughts, though that may have been your intention. The storyline just seems to be all over the place, with no real connection between your plots, leaving them fragmented.

Also, aside from the unrealistic notion that two teenage boys could kill and successfully hide the body of a grown man, the emotions that go along with killing someone, especially two young, assumingly good boys are non-existent. Brendon, being raised in a strict Mormon household would at least have a religious conscience, if not be horrified at what he'd just done because of the morality of it all. As for his uncle, obviously by fourteen he knew that what his uncle was doing was wrong, why didn't he say something to his family? That's an issue that could have easily had some

[dottyasrabbits]

Well first off, this fic should have been betaed, it needed it.

Second, I didn't really like the way it was written. It was a bit confusing and the whole thing just didn't flow very well.

And third, I thought it was very brave of you to write about the topics you did.

[i_heart_cliches]

I liked the idea behind what you wrote. I think that the concept was really interesting. The way you wrote it left me a bit disappointed, but other people have covered it already.

When I read it, it kind of seemed like you were really pushed for time, which may have been the case. But I was shocked when you killed off George, so you elicited a reaction from me. haha. Good job there.

You should definitely try to organize it a little more and rewrite it; it's a great idea :D