They want me to remember. They don't believe me when I say I've told them everything. They don't believe me when I tell them what I believe. They say there is a scientific, logical explanation. They say they are so close to a breakthrough. They can feel it ( Read more... )

Been havin a bit of a rough time lately. So instead of doin any of the work my numerous therapists, doctors, and social workers are insisting on I'm watching bullshit TV. There's some show I've been watching where the premise is covering up godawful tattoos. If someone isn't gettin something covered up they usually have some heartbreaking or ( Read more... )

It's been a while. But I stumbled on something I haven't thought of in a while, and it left me so profoundly in awe, and I felt compelled to share ( Read more... )

Aside from all the esoteric bollocks I post all the time lately, I do have a life that I've been trying to lead. I am in my own flat. It's next door to Tory- the neighbour left the country for work and left all the furniture and that way I'd have freedom but also security. My bedroom shares a wall with their flat- which they said they wanted. They ( Read more... )

Matt won't let me watch the special he did with the BBC. I mean, he's not strictly speaking able to do anything to stop me. But I promised him, so I won't watch it. He didn't say anythin about not reading the online transcripts. I know, it's not exactly keeping my promise, but I really haven't seen it and I've avoided all the bits in London. I know ( Read more... )

It's still not easy to sleep. Or function. I spend a lot of my time thinking too much, or trying to avoid thinking. Both things often involve the internet. This time, I found something while I was avoiding thinking that sent me down the other path. It's just some random thing someone wrote up and posted, something someone found interesting enough ( Read more... )

One of the many things therapy is working on with me is facing my fears. I'm working up to actually being near an ocean again. It's a slow process. For now I've been instructed to spend some time reading, watching, or listening to stories of people being on the water. I know that sounds odd, but there was a specific article, some Ranker piece that ( Read more... )

Hello OVW ( Read more... )

I saw this on Facebook the other day and it resonated deeply with me.


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I'd been reading about Lin-Manuel Miranda, just being fascinated by his work and actually pretty bloody amazed at how I can be so captivated by someone. Well Tory's girls noticed, and they said they were going to make me watch Moana because he did a lot of the soundtrack for it. They love it because it's a Disney Princess that's not a white girl. I ( Read more... )