Lisa Marie Presley Memoir Recap/Discussion: Chapter 7
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Previous recaps: Chapters 1 & 2 || Chapter 3 || Chapter 4 || Chapter 5 || Chapter 6 (pt one) || Chapter 6 (pt two)
Lisa Marie Presley’s memoir From Here to the Great Unknown was 85% done and spread across 16 tapes when she passed away in January 2023. The book consists of Lisa's recollections, daughter Riley Keough's assessments, memories and clarifications, as well as occasional input from Danny Keough, Lisa Marie’s first husband and best friend (and Riley's father).
Heavy trigger warning for drug abuse and general potentially disturbing subject matter. Please use caution.
Chapter Seven: The Bus From Nashville to L.A.
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• The chapter begins with a somewhat edgy Lisa saying there was too much pain to be sober and she wanted to check out.
• Lisa says everyone needs something to focus on, bigger than the happiness of being high. Before she got addicted, she had focus and wanted answers, and addicted, she went off the rails.
• She got her first “oh my god” high at 40 years old in the hospital recuperating from labor when she was given painkillers. She was isolated at that time in her life, getting rid of all the relationships in her life.
• Riley explains Lisa Marie took opioids for pain from the c-section, then started taking them for sleep. While she drank, she hadn't done drugs since she was a teenager, not even Advil or Tylenol. Lisa would tell Riley if she tried drugs again, it would be over for her. She had been holding back her addiction issues with scientology, raising children, marriages, spirituality but it haunted her. Lisa's father's death at 42 haunted her and as she neared 40, the clock ticked. The family couldn't imagine addiction would come for her so late in life and so viciously.
• Riley muses that in 2010 Lisa thought England was her final chance at stability and agency with a husband, young kids and a quiet life in the middle of nowhere. Lisa was trying to recreate what she had felt with Danny in California when they were young, that simple life just consisting of her family.
• Lisa loved her new life in England, but Riley and Ben felt abandoned since everyone had lived together up until that point. Lisa got them a house in Calabasas, but they ended up just staying in England with her. Riley remembers at 17 going to clubs and running around castles, drunk. Lisa initially wanted to move to Ireland but she said every place they were shown was haunted.
• The family settled on a 50-acre estate that was haunted in one room and banging could be heard around midnight. Finley told her parents she saw a man in her room and they eventually found out some grandfather had killed himself in the barn on the property. Finley had the same mystical intuition as her mother.
• Lisa still had a chef in England but she started to cook and garden with the twins. She liked to make fires at the fireplace and became good at it, Riley calls her a “fire witch.” Riley, now 21 and Benjamin, now 18, would travel to London to shop then hang out at the local pub, the owner whom Lisa became close friends with and Ben would sometimes work at the establishment. Lisa Marie eventually made her own pub at the estate and people like Jeff Beck and Sarah Ferguson hung out. Ferguson and Lisa became very close due to similar media harassment. Lisa still threw big Christmas parties but mostly stuck to the chip shop and gardening. Everything was great, but no one realized as the years went on, Lisa's pill habit was increasing.
• Riley recounts a bad incident at Soho House in London between her and Lisa. Usually fights between Riley and Lisa fixed themselves because Lisa was rational. But this time, their small argument over Riley and Benjamin going to Ireland before Christmas turned into something ugly. Lisa wouldn't let it go and there was a vicious meanness to her, accusing Riley of taking Benjamin and leaving her without warning, while Riley insisted she told Lisa weeks ago and she just forgot. Riley ended up storming out. She ran into Ben smoking and complained to him before leaving and the fight ended up resolving itself through text as she drove off.
• A few years later on vacation in Hawaii, Lisa Marie told the family she was addicted to opioids and was going to rehab in Mexico. The family went with her and Lisa Marie made an excuse to leave early, blaming the twins’ schooling. Riley called her out on ditching rehab but Lisa did what she wanted and Riley and her brother were angry. Riley, Ben and Lockwood came to the conclusion Lisa Marie didn't want to get sober. Riley says Lisa thought honesty about her addiction was the virtue - not actually changing it.
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• Ben and Riley began to notice the changes in Lisa Marie. She fell asleep early and stumbled into walls. Riley felt a dread because she remembered her mother saying over and over if she did heroin, it would kill her because she wouldn't just dabble.
• Eventually Lisa Marie realized that moving to England was a mistake because she was isolated and the drug use and loneliness had increased because she had no friends, and she needed to be alone to do drugs. Since she hated LA, she decided to move to Nashville to be closer to Graceland, be more social and do a new record, leaving Danny to sell the England house for her while Lisa got sober in the US. This made Riley feel better because Lisa had a plan.
• They rented a house in Los Angeles as they looked for Nashville houses. Riley noticed Lockwood was going out with the twins without Lisa, which Riley found strange. Riley went to check on Lisa and found her sobbing in her bathtub with a bloody nose and black eye- she had fallen while high and told Lockwood to take the girls out so they didn't see her because she was ashamed. Lisa went back to rehab the following week. After that stint, she went to Nashville.
• Both Lisa and Benjamin were falling apart at the same time. Everyone in the family was drinking a lot at the time but a now 22 year old Riley realized later Ben was also doing hard drugs. He tried to rush Riley out of a party so he could do drugs without her finding out. This became a thing in the family- they began to do things behind Riley's back [note: it is unclear if this familial pattern includes Danny or just Lisa and Benjamin]. Riley was the only family member who wasn't an addict and thus was a downer to them [note: again, it is unclear if Riley is just speaking about Lisa and Benjamin, or Danny also fell back into addiction during this period]. Lisa would say Riley was too harsh on her and Benjamin.
• Ben was a binge drinker, going hard for a couple of weeks then stopping. After binge drinking, Benjamin would then go on a kick of exercising and drinking healthy drinks and they would have long stretches of sober Ben. Benjamin never really drank during the day and was always jovial so any worries Riley would have went away the following week or month when he went sober. One worrying incident involved Benjamin falling off the bed after drinking at the pub and chipping his front tooth. He cried in Lisa's arms that night.
• Lisa's addiction meant, unlike Ben, she wasn't there emotionally. She started talking to a therapist and did group therapy. She allowed herself to get close to other people who were “fucked up,” but she hated AA. She hated talking about drugs and alcohol all the time. She agrees she is powerless over it and she believes she could stop it all but she thinks pills were designed to addict you from within and no matter the dosage, you will have withdrawals. Lisa also thinks the spirit is inside a physical shell, and while addiction affects the physical body, she thinks the root of addiction is unhappiness, a spiritual problem.
• After Lisa Marie left scientology, she began upping the pill intake. She felt everything was over- she lost her religion and friends, both of which had been her replacement family and her life. She took pills to cope with the devastation. Her addiction got worse and she started drinking more. After reading an article that said cocaine could help with opioid addiction, she started to do coke to get off opioids, then she did more opioids to get off the coke. Lisa continued her drug use during rehab because the withdrawals were too severe and she thought the doctors were too harsh and not giving her enough of what she needed. Lisa's pill addiction escalated to 80 pills a day.
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• Lisa Marie states that she believes everyone is born innocent and everyone is innately good but everyone gets fucked by their surroundings. She believes her brain is different and she's an addict. For a few years, her drug use was recreational, then it became a problem.
• Withdrawal made Lisa Marie’s blood pressure skyrocket and between the withdrawal pain and her inner pain, she couldn't be sober, she couldn't take any more beatings.
• Lisa couldn't take the shame of being an addict with two small children and her parenting standard was so high, she couldn't get sober and face what she put the twins through. She prided herself on being a great mother. She used to tell Riley, “my music wasn't that successful, I didn't finish high school, I'm not beautiful, I'm not good enough, but I'm a great mother.” She couldn't handle losing the one good trait she felt she had, so she doubled down on the drug abuse.
• In the depths of her addiction, Lisa Marie would travel from Nashville to Memphis to sleep in her father's bed at Graceland. Lisa and her kids would sleep in Elvis’ room while tours were going on downstairs. Riley says Lisa was trying to feel protected and desperate to connect with her father, she was desperate for comfort. Riley compares it to someone going to church and desperately begging Jesus for help. Every time they visited, Lisa Marie would point out the spot where she would be buried next to her father.
• When Riley returned to Los Angeles, she received a call from her mother saying something was wrong with her physically. Riley told her to come to Los Angeles to a hospital. Riley then reads a block of intense and somewhat disturbing text messages between herself, Ben and Lisa which reveal Lisa Marie is: spitting up blood, experiencing swollen limbs, bleeding from her lips, vomiting, scared.
• Lisa refused to go to a hospital in Tennessee because the state would take away the twins (Riley at this point seems oblivious to the severity of Lisa's worry, saying “for drugs? Who cares? You're going to die.”). Benjamin and Riley continue to insist Lisa see a doctor, with Ben saying he didn't care if the devil himself were a doctor, just as long as he were a doctor. Lisa insists on seeing her doctor in Los Angeles. Riley and Benjamin organized for Ben to drive an RV from Nashville to Los Angeles. The texts of an intense and upset Ben and pacifying but firm Riley speaking to Lisa Marie are really tough to read/listen to.
• Lisa was really unhappy, stressed, doing blow, drinking tequila and taking pills. Her body wasn't doing well. Everyone wanted her to go to the doctor but she wouldn't go to one in Nashville. Riley spoke to Lisa's assistant, who said a couple of times she thought Lisa was dead in bed. Riley sent Benjamin to Nashville to get Lisa and the twins.
• Ben took Lisa and the twins in a tour bus with six beds and a kitchen because Lisa wanted to do coke on the way and couldn't do that on a plane. When they reached Los Angeles, they went to Cedars Sinai and Lisa was at 30 heartbeats a minute, her heart was failing and her head and face were swollen. Lisa was admitted into the hospital, scared to death.
• Riley says Lisa Marie went straight from the emergency room to the ICU and in the midst of the chaos, she told Lockwood she was leaving him. It took a week for Lisa Marie to recover and she expressed the desire to find a safe refuge, repeatedly saying she wanted a house in the Mountain Gate neighborhood where she lived with Danny and Riley when she was young, where they had been so happy.
[OP note: omitted completely is the fact that Lisa Marie and Lockwood's divorce was apparently a stormy end that would last for years in court battles over money and custody, it would take five years for the divorce to be finalized. Both would throw accusations such as Lisa Marie claiming Lockwood was abusive, misusing/stealing her money, and taking inappropriate pictures and videos of their daughters- the last accusation was investigated with no proof found; and Lockwood accused Lisa Marie of being a constant liar, hiding her finances, and cheating. Lockwood would refuse to allow Lisa Marie a divorce for years and would battle her in court for spousal and child support until her death.]
• Lisa Marie's credit cards were frozen and she went to court-appointed rehab and did court-ordered drug testing. She had nothing. When she was given drugs to wean her off the opioids, she abused those by taking 5x that. She didn't recognize Riley when she visited and couldn't even light a cigarette.
• During rehab, Lisa decided to get bariatric surgery. She had always wanted to have that surgery because she had been called fat most of her life by tabloids. Riley worried it was just a way for Lisa to stay on medication and she wasn't ready to be sober. When she questioned Lisa, it was a massive fight and Lisa removed Riley from her guest list at the hospital. Riley was considered a narc by Lisa for contacting her doctors. But her mom was Lisa Marie Presley and she was aware of her celebrity and used it, despite complaining about her father and MJ abusing their power. Lisa would tell Riley she didn't understand because Riley wasn't an addict.
• After rehab, Lisa Marie was out of another relationship and depressed and felt she had nothing to live for. She was on medications that left her numb. Lisa had to have a monitor to see the twins and Riley became that monitor. So Lisa, Ben and the twins moved into Riley's house. Eventually Danny moved in as well. Riley notes it could have been good to have the whole family together, but instead it felt like the end of everything. The home situation would become unbearably dark for them all.
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• Riley takes a break to talk about Benjamin. She remembers them in Japan, Ben saying he couldn't get inspired by things because he got good at it too quickly. He was really smart- he played guitar, took business courses, he even tried to become a sushi chef- but couldn't find what would hook him. He started to feel pressure in his mid 20s to make a choice with his life and Riley tried to help him [note: friends of Benjamin's later told publications after his death that he also felt immense pressure and insecurity being compared to Elvis]. He wanted to live a simple life in Hawaii or Japan, but when conversations started to get serious, he felt the harsh reality that he couldn't leave his mom. Like all the siblings, he knew how fragile Lisa Marie was, how lonely and sad she was because she pushed away everyone and everything she loved and was isolated. Benjamin gave himself the responsibility to never leave Lisa's side.
• In 2018, Ben went with Riley to Tokyo where she was filming a Netflix movie. It was a big bonding time for her and her brother, taking pottery classes, food lessons and just hanging out.
• Riley got drunk for her 29th birthday and threw up after three drinks. She could hear her parents in her head telling her what a lightweight she was. Her family took pride in being “pirates” and living up to it, and when Riley claimed she too was hardcore, Lisa Marie said “oh, pookie, you are so not hardcore.”
• Riley had a pair of yellow Nikes that Benjamin was obsessed with. That was the one thing he coveted of Riley's. Riley promised him over and over she would get him a pair of “banana shoes.”
• During this time Riley was dating the man who would become her husband, stuntman Ben Smith-Peterson. Lisa Marie called Benjamin “Ben-Ben” and Ben “Big Ben” to differentiate. Ben-Ben told Big Ben that it was clear that Big Ben was going to marry Riley and Ben-Ben would make a ring since he was now into making jewelry. Big Ben got a diamond from one of his great grandmother's old rings, and gave the diamond to Ben-Ben who made a ring for him. Big Ben attached the ring to their dog and told Riley to call him over and that's how he proposed.
• Back in Los Angeles, while Ben-Ben was taking care of his mother, his own addiction to alcohol was growing as was his depression. He appeared fine when he wasn't drinking despite constantly having anxiety. His depression didn't seem dangerous, he would do drugs or go on a bender for a week then would be fine after a few days.
• Lisa Marie's emotional presence affected the family unit and her tone dictated their lives (like a folie à deux situation). So everyone's lives became hopeless because that's what she was feeling. Riley described it as the queen had fallen and everyone suffered because they had thought she was so strong nothing could break her. Lisa felt like she had nothing after a decade of addiction, saying “I have no husband, I have no friends, I have no life.”
• Ben-Ben was so close to Lisa- like Elvis with Gladys- and couldn't handle his mom being in pain. He was a mama's boy. They were so close that one's pain affected the other, they rose and fell together. What was once a perfect childhood gave way to a nightmare for Benjamin. Like most of the family, substances were a problem and relief for Ben-Ben and his alcoholism got worse.
Click to view[Lisa Marie wrote the song Storm & Grace on her 2012 album about Benjamin and his struggles]
• Despite being close, Ben didn't tell Riley how bad he was doing. He told Lisa Marie he didn't think he was okay mentally but Lisa Marie didn't tell Riley. He hid it well, according to Riley.
• The whole family was so close, when things got dark, it affected everyone. No one could get used to Lisa Marie not having her usual strength. Lisa had been the leader and now the drug abuse was dimming her light.
• After a year, Lisa, Ben and the twins moved into a house and Riley says the house felt cursed. Riley didn't want to be in that house, it felt heavy, and she didn't know if it was the house or Lisa's moods.
• Benjamin finally went to rehab [note: he went to a non-Scientology center, not Narconon, and would attempt rehab three times but only finish once] but when he returned, he had to come to the cursed house and was stuck watching his mother struggle. She wasn't sober, getting high on post-rehab medication, and she and Riley would fight about it viciously. It was hard on Ben to watch Lisa continue to deteriorate.
• Lisa eventually had a seizure that Ben witnessed. Riley arrived to help with the twins as Lisa was taken to the hospital by paramedics. She asked if Ben was okay, he said yes but Riley was too focused on the now 11 year old twins, who were upset from the scary experience. She says Ben seemed detached and checked out.
• After the seizure, Lisa finally sobered up for good, which relieved Riley. However, Riley noticed Benjamin's demeanor had changed after the incident. He isolated and got quieter, locking himself in his room. When the house had a mold problem, the family moved to a hotel because Lisa was allergic to mold.
• Ben went back to the house to throw a birthday party for his girlfriend [note: the party was a joint birthday party for Ben's girlfriend and Riley's husband, Riley and Big Ben would leave the party early]. Ben-Ben and Lisa were texting back and forth, Lisa had picked up something off about his mood and she was worried. Lisa insisted he needed to come back to the hotel after the party. At 3:30am, Lisa texted Benjamin to come home. Ben-Ben responded he was getting a beer.
• The chapter ends on the audiobook with Lisa Marie talking about having misconceptions about suicide and addiction, what her son struggled with. She talks in a sharp, jolting tone about needing to help people that have misconceptions like she did.
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For substance abuse treatment and mental health referrals in the US, contact the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration's (SAMHSA) National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357). UK-wide, call 116 123 or text SHOUT to 85258
Source: me and my handy dandy book and audible account, pics: one, two, three, four, five, six, YouTube