The Love Bomber Trope: Rom-Com Dream to Total Nightmare

[theemii]

Click to view

Love bombing has been a huge topic of conversation in recent years, and if we take a closer look, we might start to notice that the TV and movie characters who we thought were so lovable and charming are actually doing this too - from self-identified “nice guys” like How I Met Your Mother’s Ted Mosby to full on bad guys like Chuck Bass from Gossip

Comments

[my_moloko]

It's been a long time since I watched Gossip Girl but I don't remember Chuck being a love bomber.

[insecuredesign]

He gave gifts to Blair every time he fucked up.

[teaaet]

yeah... dan was the creepy love bomber, obsessed with serena.

[bsfan]

Same...I was like Chuck?!?!

But in reality....I don't remember a lot of stuff about Chair. I've blocked it out if I even watched it in the first place.

[funhouse]

i thought love bombing was about people who do grand gestures which make you feel obligated to comply/reciprocate

have i been wrong this entire time

[ginainabottle]

That isn't something the love bomber demands from you at first, their thing is to make it look like they do it just bc they're so into you, not bc they expect something in return. They make you feel incredibly loved and special, and out of nowhere their behavior completely changes & that's when they'd make you feel obligated to do something, in order to get the treatment/"rewards" they're now denying you.

[squirrels_oh_no]

Yep, it's also why it's so prevalent in cults and cult recruiting.

[ginainabottle]

This is both incredibly obvious and completely shocking to me bc I never made the love bombing connection outside "romantic" relationships. Makes perfect sense.

[livejournal]

Hello! Your entry got to top-25 of the most popular entries in LiveJournal!
Learn more about LiveJournal Ratings in FAQ.

[ginainabottle]

Watching 'You' was always a trip bc so many women are genuinely into Joe while completely ignoring the obvious fact that he's a psycho. Honestly, love bombing is probably the most efficient way to trap someone, especially vulnerable women, bc we've been constantly fed the notion that it's romantic when men are intense & lack boundaries, as if you can't truly control yourself when you're deeply in love with someone. I wish we had more examples of nice guy characters who are actually nice (case in point: Jake Peralta from B99) instead of characters like Ted Mosby.

[bsfan]

It's a testament to Penn's acting. Seriously the amount of times I found myself shipping Joe and Beck and then suddenly remembering he's a murderer. It happened far too many times.

[ginainabottle]

Yes, he's very charming and the fact that he looks great is also a plus lol

[wowsolovely]

I also thought love bombing as giant grand gestures and thought I knew better but I totally have fallen for the showered with compliments love bombing a few times. The guy im dating now doesn't do that but when he first would compliment my looks I would just say okay because I was like i hear the same shit and need to not immediately believe it

[squirrels_oh_no]

I have that issue which has been reinforced by my experiences in the workplace - people tell me I am doing great, great work, awesome job, and I never believe them and feel like they're lying to me for some reason. I was pressured to resign recently by a boss who had called me her superstar only a few months ago. I have a lot of trust issues in relationships and at work especially because of stuff like that. LMAO, I am now realizing I got love-bombed at my last job... Welp.

[wowsolovely]

yeah I had a long term relationship whwre he wasn't attracted to me and made me feel awful about my body and looks so now when guys say they love my body abd think im hot im immediately smitten but it's definitely just a line/move most the time so now in like hmmmmm when men say certain compliments.

ugh sorry about work a lot of companies and managers are liars and heartless so I get the distrust but as long as your doing what you can maybe youll feel better.