ONTD Original: 5 Songs to Add to your Alien Sex Playlist

[xhurlyburly]

ONTD University's astronomy department recently discovered that aliens are in fact real, and students are now curious about the intricies of fucking our extraterrestial overlords or swearing off human dick in favor of alien probes. Although researchers are still determining whether birth control is effective and/or necessary when having sex with

Comments

[tanglespiders]

*astrology, OP

[xhurlyburly]

[tanglespiders]

just quoting our prospectus

[squirrels_oh_no]

We're all about those Politicials.

[deadendqueen16]

via GIPHY

[squirrels_oh_no]

ONTD, you haven't lived until you read the alien sex in this book - https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/38601826-the-scorpion-s-mate?ac=1&from_search=true&qid=Pj2Rr7I1BT&rank=1

Spoiler alert - the alien, who is a scorpion man, feeds his new human mate by her giving him blowjobs and his cum is nutritious and tastes like a tropical smoothie.

[dejatrue]

[primimproper]

Wow this makes Ice Planet Barbarians seem vanilla.

[bellwetherr]

i mean ice planet barbarians IS kind of vanilla in the smut department

[futile_devices]

I’ll add “Subterranean Homesick Alien” by Radiohead for the post-coital cuddles

[setsuna16]

Because they're, like, aliens who hop on chairs or something?

[cuppaboba]

tbh all of Shinhwa's discography will be playing in the bg
like satellite and shooting stars