My Best Friend's dad died suddenly on Tuesday night.  I am flying to Colorado for the funeral with Faelyn and without Hubby Dear on Saturday. Everyone is excited to see Faelyn and delighted by the surprise visit, until I tell them why. And of course at that point we all just breathe. Its been this way in March for us before.

I am remembering all I ( Read more... )

On Valentine's Day I worked a party for one of our charitable program's residents. We had a lovely meal followed by some good old bingo. I was walking around calling the numbers again for those who didnt hear and ened up at a table with some very lovely people. An Irish woman, a Cuban, a man who I presume is Gay, A singer, a black woman, and a ( Read more... )

Someone asked me today why I was smiling ( Read more... )

I have to say, this is even better and even harder than I ever imagined. I find myself getting giddy as I drive home from work, just to see her. I find myself exhausted at the end of a work from home day because the balance is so precarious. She is really trying to move now and she gets so frustrated that she cant. I have to let her be frustrated ( Read more... )

I have been trying desparately to find the time to sit down and write. This is, after all, what I supposedly do - right?  I am giving myself more time. I think I need it, I have had a lot of it, its true, but more time away from things like, producing and directing. More time to enjoy Faelyn. More time to figure out a better bedtime routine ( Read more... )

The only things I have left to talk about come insequentially to me. I cant remember what happened when, but I remember this.

At some point I am getting out of bed, or rolled out of bed and left in a chair and I realize that I cant get out without help. Its bizzare.

In the middle of the night Faelyn is crying and crying. A nurse comes in and ( Read more... )

Faelyn has a button, at last. We are keeping it covered and slathered with antibacterial ointment for five more days, then I dont ever have to wonder when the bleeding will stop on that particular part of her body... any more.

Mucho Happinesso.

The appointment with the surgeon, Dr.Connolly a fine Irish man, went well. Faelyn was fascinated with him and giggled through much of the appointment. (Atta girl!) She is going to have the small bit of her cord that remains frozen and sliced off on October 19 at 7:30 am. Then a week of healing - then swimming with no guilt! I am much less anxious ( Read more... )

Today would have been my parents' 32nd wedding anniversary. It gets easier  but all of the anniversaries are still hard. Still so very hard ( Read more... )

They are sewing up layers of muscle and fat and uterus and stuffing everyting back in. I am looking at the bright lights overhead and wondering about mydaughter. I have a daughter! I can't wait to see her again, to hear how big she is. To look at this supposedly red hair the nurses keep talking about.

I am rolled off the surgical bed and onto a ( Read more... )