"This is Lucas Lee. I don't have time for you right now. I'm probably also not going to listen to your message. Come on, I'm a movie star. Call my manager, bro." BEEP.
"Ugh, phone harassment? That's just pathetic, you know that? Besides, I've already seen yer 'love monkey,' and once was more than enough. In fact, ya know what ya can do with your love monkey? Ya can--
*very timely static interference* and then-- *more static* with five *static static static* bleedin' from the *static*
"Oh my god, Ric, I swear to you I did nothing wrong! I have been like, the best little vampire ever and somehow my creeper Irish screw-up of a roommate figured it out and thinks he can like, go hunting with me or something insane. He's asking all about sexual kinks and blood drinking and I don't think anyone gets how hard it is to stay off the wagon here! I mean, I've been binging on food every time I walk past a common room and don't even get me started on how great the boys smell. God, and I so thought I could deal with the boys here, but there are no happy endings. Even if my big brother alone is totally making me think incest should be legalized even if it is just a school program, but I was totally planning ahead and waiting to let things be normal." Caroline paused to breathe. Finally. "But no, why would my life ever be normal? It's not even like Nathan is one of those super smart detectivey types, either! I didn't even slip and say something about vampires and believe me, I so could have. And no, I didn't
( ... )
Comments 6
"Ugh, phone harassment? That's just pathetic, you know that? Besides, I've already seen yer 'love monkey,' and once was more than enough. In fact, ya know what ya can do with your love monkey? Ya can--
*very timely static interference* and then-- *more static* with five *static static static* bleedin' from the *static*
In other words, keep dreamin', Crater Face."
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I realise it was some time ago, but I assure you that I did notice that you were a man when we slept together.
And I think your eyes are very pretty too.
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"Oh my god, Ric, I swear to you I did nothing wrong! I have been like, the best little vampire ever and somehow my creeper Irish screw-up of a roommate figured it out and thinks he can like, go hunting with me or something insane. He's asking all about sexual kinks and blood drinking and I don't think anyone gets how hard it is to stay off the wagon here! I mean, I've been binging on food every time I walk past a common room and don't even get me started on how great the boys smell. God, and I so thought I could deal with the boys here, but there are no happy endings. Even if my big brother alone is totally making me think incest should be legalized even if it is just a school program, but I was totally planning ahead and waiting to let things be normal." Caroline paused to breathe. Finally. "But no, why would my life ever be normal? It's not even like Nathan is one of those super smart detectivey types, either! I didn't even slip and say something about vampires and believe me, I so could have. And no, I didn't ( ... )
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