Fill: Cat's in the Cradle (1/5)lunik_the_bardSeptember 13 2012, 15:56:43 UTC
I know that mostly the bonus points are supposed to be a footnote to the fill. But the image of Tony cheerfully claiming to be Loki's father was too good.So, aliens visited Earth and the first people they came to were the Avengers. Something to do with a warrior culture that valued heroes over policy makers. Tony could get behind that, mostly because he was more interested in getting his hands on whatever technology the youngest alien was happily calling "magic" than in... making sense
( ... )
Fill: Cat's in the Cradle (2/5)lunik_the_bardSeptember 13 2012, 15:59:20 UTC
"I tried for two months as hi PA, that didn't work." Natasha wasn't even trying to hide the laughter in her voice. "What about you, Thor?"
"I have been Loki's brother for near a millennium, Lady Widow. If it has not worked thus far, I feel it never will." Hanging around Tony's neck like an unwieldy necklace, Loki was shaking with suppressed laughter again. He maintained the hug like a champion, though.
"Look on the bright side, Cap!" said Clint. "We're all uncles!"
"Oh, my god," said Bruce. "Who's going to tell Pepper she's a stepmother?"
"A God's stepmother," corrected Natasha. "I think it should be me."
"No way!" Tony protested. "I should tell her myself, it's only fair!" I came up with this one, I want to see that little quirk her lips do when I've actually surprised her. He started to make for the door, to get Pepper on the phone when he realised his movements were being a little hampered by his new godly son still clinging to him. Loki had his eyes closed, a blissful little smile on his face
( ... )
Fill: Cat's in the Cradle (3/5)lunik_the_bardSeptember 13 2012, 16:03:43 UTC
SHIELD (Coulson and Fury) roped Tony into helping recruit Loki to the Avengers. Neither of them said the words you're his father, talk to him. But they didn't say them pretty loudly.
Tony walked into the rec room on the 'public floor' of the tower, where everyone mostly congregated. Loki was on the couch, eating an orange and watching Clint murder Bruce at some racing game on the TV. "Hey," he said as he came in, "you're too old to be lying around playing video games. Get a job."
Loki blinked at him before remembering the game they were playing. He swung his legs up onto the back of the couch and sat upside down. "Got one," he said, through a mouthful of fruit. "I'm a lab rat." He stuck out his tongue.
"A real job. Don't you talk back to me, I'm your father--"
"--probably--" said Clint without looking away from the screen.
"--possibly--" said Bruce.
"--but not really," said Natasha from her seat in the corner. Steve was watching with a bemused smile.
"--I'm your father," said Tony firmly, "and I know what's best. That's it, you
( ... )
Fill: Cat's in the Cradle (4/5)lunik_the_bardSeptember 13 2012, 16:08:36 UTC
Fathers' Day came around, inevitably. Clint circled the date on the calendar, and Steve bought a video camera and loudly claimed it was for other things. When asked, he couldn't think of any. Despite Natasha mouthing to him behind Tony's back. But when Sunday came Loki ignored him all day. Tony tried as hard as he could not to be disappointed. He would have liked a macaroni card of his own. Then after sundown, when there was no work left to do, Loki took him by the hand, dragged him into the lab and taught him the first magic spell he had ever learned. Tony summoned fire in his hand, and watched it dance until morning
( ... )
Fill: Cat's in the Cradle (5/5)lunik_the_bardSeptember 13 2012, 16:11:01 UTC
Loki, when Tony confronted him, thought this was the funniest thing in nine realms. The rest of the team, when Loki gleefully told them, stared at Tony like they didn't understand how 'genius' could exist in a body with this much 'ditz'.
Finally there came the ceremony, all pomp and circumstance, of Loki leaving Midgard. Thor came to pick him up, and Kvasir was with him. Tony had no idea how he had managed that. He didn't pay attention to these things. It felt like a handing over of joint custody, with half the world leaders there to play social workers. Kvasir was blond, streaked with grey, and heavy. Tony looked at him standing next to willowy, dark Loki and couldn't help but snicker. "He looks nothing like you," he muttered out of the corner of his mouth
( ... )
Re: Fill: Cat's in the Cradle (5/5)lunik_the_bardSeptember 13 2012, 20:50:29 UTC
I was actually laughing like a crazy person while writing this too. I'm relieved! Usually things that are that funny to me don't translate as funny to anyone else!
Re: Fill: Cat's in the Cradle (5/5)persephone_koreSeptember 13 2012, 16:47:37 UTC
*giggling helplessly* I've got to come back to this, but it's fantastic. -Loki and Tony being goofballs! (Affectionate goofballs.) And playing along with each other. -Thor telling them they'd planned to leave an ambassador and just roll with it. -Calling JARVIS brother. -Captain Midgard! -Loki saying he doesn't understand either. -The blood transfusion embarrassment. *g* Although I think somebody was unnecessarily flustered over the biology. It's easy enough for a human parent and child not to be cross-compatible -- and Loki's publicly (at least) half alien so I suspect there was some embarrassment over having asked him at all. *g* -All the stuff about how they obviously (or obviously don't) look alike. If Tony meets Laufey, though, he's going to stop worrying about the height difference with Loki pronto. :D -Tony/Pepper, which is cute even if Pepper doesn't show up much. *g* -Loki and Natasha putting Tony to bed as if he were their kid.
Re: Fill: Cat's in the Cradle (5/5)lunik_the_bardSeptember 13 2012, 20:56:59 UTC
Hee, thank you! Affectionate goofballs is the best way to describe them X)
During the blood transfusion incident would have been pretty funny if Tony wasn't bleeding to death. Loki and Tony wearing such identical looks of wtf that they may as well have been related - really, paramedic? Really?
Also, if Tony met Laufey, his first thought would be How am I supposed to impregnate THAT? and then the rest of the meeting would be pretending he never thought that.
Re: Fill: Cat's in the Cradle (5/5)persephone_koreSeptember 13 2012, 21:49:51 UTC
Ow. My brain has just gone to a strange location in which there is time travel, and Tony and Pepper try to lure Laufey into a threesome with the pickup line "A thousand years from now, if you play your cards right, all the other worlds will be competing to claim they slept with you and fathered your son." And it works.
Re: Fill: Cat's in the Cradle (5/5)wnnb_darklordSeptember 13 2012, 22:11:28 UTC
You know, if that had happened, Laufey's reluctance to say who the father is would totally make even more sense. After all, he has to keep those pesky paradoxes from stopping Tony from *not* building a time machine!
Re: Fill: Cat's in the Cradle (5/5)lunik_the_bardSeptember 13 2012, 17:03:02 UTC
OP here! I LOVE YOU.
This was fantastic - nearly wet myself laughing. I love that Loki's pretty much acknowledged several other fathers. As silly as it all was, it was also really sweet. Thanks for the speediness and greatness! :D
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"I have been Loki's brother for near a millennium, Lady Widow. If it has not worked thus far, I feel it never will." Hanging around Tony's neck like an unwieldy necklace, Loki was shaking with suppressed laughter again. He maintained the hug like a champion, though.
"Look on the bright side, Cap!" said Clint. "We're all uncles!"
"Oh, my god," said Bruce. "Who's going to tell Pepper she's a stepmother?"
"A God's stepmother," corrected Natasha. "I think it should be me."
"No way!" Tony protested. "I should tell her myself, it's only fair!" I came up with this one, I want to see that little quirk her lips do when I've actually surprised her. He started to make for the door, to get Pepper on the phone when he realised his movements were being a little hampered by his new godly son still clinging to him. Loki had his eyes closed, a blissful little smile on his face ( ... )
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Tony walked into the rec room on the 'public floor' of the tower, where everyone mostly congregated. Loki was on the couch, eating an orange and watching Clint murder Bruce at some racing game on the TV. "Hey," he said as he came in, "you're too old to be lying around playing video games. Get a job."
Loki blinked at him before remembering the game they were playing. He swung his legs up onto the back of the couch and sat upside down. "Got one," he said, through a mouthful of fruit. "I'm a lab rat." He stuck out his tongue.
"A real job. Don't you talk back to me, I'm your father--"
"--probably--" said Clint without looking away from the screen.
"--possibly--" said Bruce.
"--but not really," said Natasha from her seat in the corner. Steve was watching with a bemused smile.
"--I'm your father," said Tony firmly, "and I know what's best. That's it, you ( ... )
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Finally there came the ceremony, all pomp and circumstance, of Loki leaving Midgard. Thor came to pick him up, and Kvasir was with him. Tony had no idea how he had managed that. He didn't pay attention to these things. It felt like a handing over of joint custody, with half the world leaders there to play social workers. Kvasir was blond, streaked with grey, and heavy. Tony looked at him standing next to willowy, dark Loki and couldn't help but snicker. "He looks nothing like you," he muttered out of the corner of his mouth ( ... )
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-Loki and Tony being goofballs! (Affectionate goofballs.) And playing along with each other.
-Thor telling them they'd planned to leave an ambassador and just roll with it.
-Calling JARVIS brother.
-Captain Midgard!
-Loki saying he doesn't understand either.
-The blood transfusion embarrassment. *g* Although I think somebody was unnecessarily flustered over the biology. It's easy enough for a human parent and child not to be cross-compatible -- and Loki's publicly (at least) half alien so I suspect there was some embarrassment over having asked him at all. *g*
-All the stuff about how they obviously (or obviously don't) look alike. If Tony meets Laufey, though, he's going to stop worrying about the height difference with Loki pronto. :D
-Tony/Pepper, which is cute even if Pepper doesn't show up much. *g*
-Loki and Natasha putting Tony to bed as if he were their kid.
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During the blood transfusion incident would have been pretty funny if Tony wasn't bleeding to death. Loki and Tony wearing such identical looks of wtf that they may as well have been related - really, paramedic? Really?
Also, if Tony met Laufey, his first thought would be How am I supposed to impregnate THAT? and then the rest of the meeting would be pretending he never thought that.
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Yeah, my brain is now right there with you in Tony/Laufey/Pepper-land. This is a bizarre and scary place!
(Also, how does Frost Giant cross-species conception work? Could Pepper be the father? PLOT TWIST!)
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This was fantastic - nearly wet myself laughing. I love that Loki's pretty much acknowledged several other fathers. As silly as it all was, it was also really sweet. Thanks for the speediness and greatness! :D
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Loki has quite a few fathers, I guess. He's never come across a father who made so few demands from him before. Tony is the cool dad ;)
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