TITLE: The Final Countdown
AUTHOR:
nicis_anatomyCHARACTER: human!Ten, Rose, Ten, Donna, Jackie (implied Ten/Rose)
GENRE: Gen, Angst, episode tag for 4.13 "Journey's End"
RATING: PG
WORD COUNT: 1000
SUMMARY: The last seconds in the TARDIS before they land on Bad Wolf Bay ... Written for prompt #08 "The Final Countdown" for
12_stories.
WARNINGS: English still isn't my native language (although I wish) and the story is not beta'd. This is my first Doctor Who story in a while. Hope I still got everything right.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own these characters. I just borrow them from time to time to have some fun with them.
We're leaving together
But still it's farewell
And maybe we'll come back
To earth, who can tell
(The Final Countdown - Europe)
~*~*~*~*
Ten - Nine
The humming of the TARDIS is in perfect sync with my heart, my one heart that beats in my chest, loud and fast and yet calming and regular.
It still feels odd to have only one heart and I wonder how humans could live with these endless break between two heart beats. Every time I feel it, it's like my life would stop and I would die right her where I stand; in one corner of the TARDIS, far away from everyone else.
Eight - Seven
I like to watch them enjoy each other's company. I know, this moment will be over soon and nothing will stay the same. Sarah Jane, Jack, Mickey and Martha have already left. Their goodbyes were sad and tearful; for them, but mostly for me. I know, this was the last time I ever saw them, but it felt like they didn't care. I don't know, what it is, that made them ignore me; maybe it's because of Him - my other self, the doctor, the real doctor -, maybe its because I did something horrible earlier, that had saved them all, but at the same time … it was cold-blooded murder, genocide. I can still feel the anger running through my veins, powered by the beating of my heart. My one heart.
I know, I had to do it, and at the same time I'm ashamed and frightened by myself.
Six - Five
I try to push these thoughts away to concentrate on what lies ahead of us. I only have a few seconds left, before I have to leave. Forever. There will be no coming back, no chance to reunite with my friends.
Or with Donna
For a second, our eyes meet and she smiles. It's a sad smile, showing me she knows what is going to happen soon; what has to happen, because I can't be here. I'm not part of the plan, there can't be two doctors in one universe. It's not right. It doesn't feel right. And at the same time it's all I want.
I don't want to go. I want to stay. With Him, with her.
Four -Three
I want to be with them and with Rose. We could be extraordinary together. The Fantastic Four.
It's not going to happen. I know it. He knows it. And Donna knows it, too.
Sighing, I let my eyes wander again, until I spot Jackie. Like me, she is standing a few feed away from the rest, watching her daughter laughing about something He has just said. She smiles, but it's the same sad smile Donna gave me and I know that she knows it, too. I know how she feels, what she is going through and for a long moment my heart, my one heart, misses a beat.
She knows, Rose has to leave, and she wants her to come back with her to Pete and her family, but she also knows that it would mean leaving the one behind, Rose is in love with for so long; the man she did everything to come back to. I normally can't know this, but the human part in me, knows instinctively, what Rose had to go through, when she was trapped in this strange and unfamiliar universe with no chance to come back.
It must have killed her - but it didn't. It had made her strong, and I hope, from the bottom of my heart, that this strength will help her survive what is inevitable going to happen next.
Two - One
Rose … my Rose. My girl. I'm so proud of her. She's grown so much since I first meet her all these years ago. She has done so many great things. She has saved the world countless times.
She is strong, powerful and beautiful, but at the same time so vulnerable and still that young girl I met when saving her from these mad killer shop dummies.
Rose … she has no idea what is going to happen soon, and I'm somehow glad that she doesn't. She should spend these last seconds in happiness, enjoying the victory she has fought for all these years. She should be happy. She should be with Him, with the doctor she loves.
I swallow hard, hoping that one day she will see me as her doctor. I have no hopes that she will accept me as a replacement. I hope she will, though, but it's also fine with me, if she doesn't. She doesn't need to love me or want me in her life. But I hope she will.
Every nerve in my body, every cell is aching for her, and it hurts. Badly. I wonder, if that's what Rose feels for him, and if that's what all humans have to suffer through, if I - as a human being - have to suffer through this, too. I don't know, if I can do it. Not alone. I will, if I have to, and I will be there for her, if she lets me. If not … well, I'm still a fighter and I will try to fight for her, like she has fought for Him.
Zero
Suddenly, the TARDIS lands and for a moment we are all bouncing around, trying to grab something near us to keep us on our feed. Donna, having done this many times before, has steadied herself at the console, while Jackie - always the slow one - wasn't that lucky. She is sitting on the floor, looking confused and angry.
I hurry over to her to help her up. From the corner of my eyes I see Rose and Him. Her hand is resting on his arm, while they both laugh about the hard landing. She still doesn't know, what is going to happen, and I turn away to gave her one last happy moment with Him, before her world will fall apart again.
Leaving the TARDIS with Jackie by my side, I hope, the next time, I will be the one catching Rose, when she falls.
- The End -