Underage readers?

[nialla42]

Dear Prudence: Help! My 13-Year-Old Daughter Has Been Reading Pornographic Fan Fiction.

(I've also posted this on Tumblr)

Q. 13-Year-Old Daughter Reading Porn Disguised as Fan Fiction: I discovered my 13-year-old daughter has been reading fan fiction for a very popular all boy band which describes in explicit detail sex acts between the male band

Comments

[green_grrl]

Ha ha! Yes, my first reaction was, "why back in my day, we had to get our underage porn reading from V.C. Andrews and Judith Kranz and our dad's Playboys!" *shakes cane*

I think parents just don't like to think of their little babies as sexual creatures, and it was particularly jarring that it was something new to the mom, not something relatable like paperbacks with spines creased in certain places. Someone disturbed specifically by the gay aspect would probably not be a Prudence reader.

[nialla42]

"Kids, get offa my lawn

[khek]

I have to laugh at the V.C. Anderews repackaging. A mom came up to me recently and asked if I thought her ten year old would enjoy them, because she'd loved them so much in high school. I asked her if she remembered them well, because the week before she hadn't wanted her daughter to read something that was fairly mild on the relationship scale because she believed it was "too explicit". She started paging through the book, and her eyes got wide and she decided to "wait a couple more years."

[nialla42]

I can't tell you how many books I read when I was younger, then read even just a few years later and went, "Wait, what? That was in there?"

I've often said that if a kid picks up a book that's too "advanced" for them in any way, they're either going to figure it out anyway (in which case they already had an awareness), or it's just going to zoom over their heads. Apparently that's what happened with me, with lots of things going over my head until I was old enough to have figured them out.

[khek]

I think if kids aren't ready for it, they'll stop reading. If they are curious, they'll probably find a way to read it anyway, despite blocks.

From the wording, I think the parent was more upset by the sex, and didn't care about the partners. But it could also be that the letter was edited by the columnist.

Personally, I'd rather block violence and bloody games over "pornographic writing" any day. When you look up at the computer and see kids playing what seems like an innocent game called "Happy Families" with an animated toddler on the back of his father's bike who suddenly hits a branch, gets decapitated and starts spurting blood all over the place....well, I know which one *I* think is more disturbing!

[nialla42]

If they're not ready, it's quite possible the bits parents are worried about they'll just skip over or not get.

As Prudence points out, it's easy to go over to a friend's house and use their computer. Or if they have a tablet, they can read it on that unless the block is also covering the wifi. Or just go to a free wifi spot and download stuff to read later. Where there's a will, there's a way.

The kids in my library went through a phase of playing a game that I think was called Stick Figure Death Fight. Stick figures fighting with blood and body parts flying, but it wasn't technically horror. Also wasn't very pleasant to watch over and over.

[tx_cronopio]

The comments on that one were pretty hilarious -- there were people who get fanfic and tried patiently to explain it (including yours truly) -- and there were the others. The worst were the guys who didn't want their little princesses reading about nasty icky gay sex, which has no relation to the fact that they loves them some girl on girl. IT'S ALL WAY DIFFERENT :)

[nialla42]

Oh dear, I'll have to go back and read the comments now. I usually avoid comments.

One of my male friends online knows I'm a slasher. He doesn't get it, but he's not judgmental either. He just sees it as "naked women are pretty, men are kinda funny looking naked". It's all in the eye of the beholder.

One thing I've noticed is that while I don't flinch over explicit text (unless the grammar is horrible), I'm liable to spontaneously combust from blushing from explicit visuals. Perhaps it's women are generally conditioned towards text over imagery (and most imagery of naked men are targeted towards gay men, which might not suit a straight woman's taste), or just that I didn't have much opportunity to see such images until I went online in the early 90s.

[lmichelle599]

I think it might have been because it's two guys. And it's probably One Direction, too. :P

I agree. If teens want to read NC-17 fic, they'll find a way. And, hey, at least she's reading. Points for that.

I also feel sorry for the teenage girl. A brief talk with mom about PWP fanfic?? I'd want to die.

[nialla42]

Hell, I'm 44 years old, and I'd want the ground to swallow me up before I had a talk about gay PWP fanfic.

I know bandom fic is big, but I was too old for it by the time it became a thing. Makes me feel old when I hear about all these various types of fic that I had no idea existed.

[lmichelle599]

Well, I'm not a parent and when I was 13, I was reading Judy Blume books or Choose Your Own Adventure. Of course back in our day there was no Internet. :P Thirteen is too young for porn (het or slash) IMO. Hell, I'll read some slash summaries/warnings and think WTH. I know everyone has their own kinks, but I don't know where authors get these ideas. Probably written by teens, too.

I wish my local library had some M/M romances. It's all het, so if teens want to read m/m romance novels/stories, their only option is online.

[nialla42]

I didn't have internet access until I was out of high school. Still a teen, but almost legally an adult. Though for a while there it was all just email and BBS access.

Though my friends and I were massive nerds reading all the time, and if one of us found a book with naughty bits, it was passed around. We were having end of semester exams when I was in 8th grade (I would have been 11/12), and I always brought a book to kill time after I was done. A 7th grader was reading the first Dragonriders of Pern book, and there's telepathic dragon influenced sex, and I was informed of this fact. She passed the book on to me to read, then I went out and bought all the ones that were out at that point.

I swear some fanfic writers are so liberated by the ability to do anything, they don't just push the boundaries, they nuke the boundaries

[aelfgyfu_mead]

As a mother who has a thirteen-year-old daughter: I worry about my daughter reading (or possibly even viewing) porn. I don't worry a huge amount. I'm at least as worried about violence, but I think she's more willing to talk to me about violence. We've had some talks about sex, and we will have more, but she has never yet initiated them. I'm not sure what I can do to encourage her to do so. I've tried to make her comfortable coming to me with questions about anything, and I'll keep trying, but I don't think fanfic is where she should be forming ideas of sex at this age! I'd rather she not read about any kind of sex-gay or straight-when she isn't even comfortable talking about it with me. I wasn't reading about it or looking at it when I was her age. Maybe I was unusual.

When I read fic with some sexual content, I'm actually less comfortable with het than with slash, possibly because most of the time it seems very different from my own experiences with sexuality and sexual relations. When I read slash, I occasionally wonder if gay

[nialla42]

I don't have kids, so I feel weird weighing in on it sometimes, but I'm sort of an "auntie" to a lot of them, whether by blood or not. As I'm sure you know, they often to talk to non-parents about uncomfortable topics, often to work out their own thoughts before talking to a parent