I'm increasingly frustrated with the quality of my relationships. Angry Geek is pretty fantastic -- he works really hard to be the best he can for me -- and he very rarely lets me down in any way
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Expectations can feel like a rejection of love on its own terms, which is why so many heart-forward people resist setting them. I understand this.
I found, relatively recently in my 39 years on the planet, that expectations are really helpful for the others in our lives. If I admit to and communicate them, then Jonathan (and my other friends) spend a lot less time and energy trying to figure out what will make me happy from the vague cues I drop, and hit the target more often.
I mean, hey, you wouldn't fake an orgasm. You'd say "You there, these are things that please me. Choose among them for best effect." Those are expectations you have NO problem communicating, right? Just broaden the scope of getting you off, so to speak.
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I found, relatively recently in my 39 years on the planet, that expectations are really helpful for the others in our lives. If I admit to and communicate them, then Jonathan (and my other friends) spend a lot less time and energy trying to figure out what will make me happy from the vague cues I drop, and hit the target more often.
I mean, hey, you wouldn't fake an orgasm. You'd say "You there, these are things that please me. Choose among them for best effect." Those are expectations you have NO problem communicating, right? Just broaden the scope of getting you off, so to speak.
Much love,
Rowan
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