Title: The Gift of Grace
Author: Gnat
Chapters: 1/1, more of a snippet really
Word count: 357
Rating: T, for language
Genre: Gen, Friendship
Characters: Sheppard, Weir
Warnings: Sappiness. Probably a little OOC.
Summary: Just a little chat between Weir and Sheppard.
Disclaimers: Don't own them. Never will. It is all in fun and no copyright infringement is intended. Don't sue. Unbeta'ed, all mistakes are mine. If you find any mistakes, feel free to let me know. Any and all comments are welcome.
Sheppard looked down at his hands and was silent for a moment while he gathered his thoughts. "Have you ever lost something, someone, so close to you, although you never knew it was there, when it was gone, it almost destroyed you? I have and it did destroy me. Very slowly. It ate at my soul until it was almost completely gone. you gave me a second chance to redeem myself, prove to myself and to everyone that I am not a failure. I just wanted to thank you for that chance."
The silence in the room was deafening.
For the first time since the conversation began, Elizabeth could actually see some true emotion behind the usual congenial mask Sheppard wore. What she saw behind those eyes, when he did look up at her, scared her. An old adage, 'the eyes are a window to the soul,' came to mind. She could tell that that she was looking at a world-weary soul. Hell, he had every right to be, after what he'd been though. Elizabeth resisted the urge to get up and go around the desk and comfort him. She knew John would neither appreciate the sentiment nor would he accept the comfort offered. Allowing Sheppard to continue uninterrupted, Elizabeth sat silently.
"You know, I was...different...before all of this." John waved an arm to encompass himself (exactly what it meant Elizabeth didn't have a clue), gave a humorless laugh, a laugh that was grating to the ears. "That was a lifetime ago. I'm not sure that John Sheppard can ever exist again. Hell, sometimes I have to wonder if he ever existed.
"Tell me."
John took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Sometimes...sometimes, I have a hard time accepting what has happened to me. All the good things. Never until this," again a dismissive wave, "had anyone really believed in me. Hell, I didn't have enough courage to believe in myself. Here, I have friends, not one's just interested in being friends because of a name, and more important..." John paused for a long moment, gauging his own readiness to admit to vulnerability, "a family."
THE END