From Pres. Spencer W. Kimball

[najacheese]

"It is interesting to note that most of us have a tendency to want to ape the ways of our neighbor, in styles or curricula or universities...We seem reluctant to establish our own standards, make our own styles, follow our own patterns which are based on dignity, comfort and propriety

Comments

[itingen]

social proof is a huge force in our lives... this is a tea-worthy conversation.

-ian

[najacheese]

Make it an Oreo milkshake conversation and I'm there with bells on! I love talking about these sorts of things -- I'm such a psych/soc nerd!

[itingen]

name the time and the place. ill be there with bells on :)

I want to be one of a kind too!

[bnjo]

I don't think anyone would ever accuse you of trying to be like anyone else. I want to one of a kind just like Nadia . . . wait . . . is it still being original if I'm only doing it because everyone else is.

Re: I want to be one of a kind too!

[najacheese]

You live?

[najacheese]

Oh man, now you're scaring me: I just bought a box of bronze-brown Feria dye and I'm waiting to run out of my current shampoo before I dye. If I turn blonde I'm toast -- I've done blonde before and olive-skinned women should never be yellow-blonde. (I did okay with white Rogue stripes, tho. Weird.)

My husband's blonde and his burns turn into tans -- His kiddie pics are hilarious, he looked like a blonde Mexican.

[chguat]

And so the discussion continues over here. I actually had a conversation similar to this one with Amber yesterday. It's very clear to me now that all of the people who have been closest to me in my life are people for whom social and peer pressure plays a minimal role. I don't think that's a coincidence. I just think there's a significant number of kids in the church who are smart enough to not want a king like unto other nations. And many these people are my friends.

[najacheese]

I wouldn't say it takes a minimal role, otherwise I wouldn't have gone inactive after being unrighteously/unfairly judged by the Mesa/Gilbert Mormons. But in the end, for me anyway, it takes too much effort to pretend to be someone other than myself and I'm no longer willing to let that get (that much) in the way of what I want. Even if it means people don't like me as much.

Nadia

P.S. Peer pressure -- Let go of the old man pants! They're hideous! ::giggles, runs away::

[chguat]

But that's the thing, you've chosen to be yourself regardless of what people around you are doing. Even though you let those people get to you for a time you never 1) became one of them or 2) allowed their nonsense to have any sort of long-term effect. I'm not saying people like you and me don't occaisionally waiver with the winds of popular thinking, but it isn't our main motivation for doing things. That's what's different about it.

And as for the old man pants, they're here to stay. Brown polyester will never go out of style. Never!

[najacheese]

Ah comprende. I remember exactly when I gave up trying to become the "them," the first time -- My sophomore year of HS I realized the in clothes were too expensive and not as colorful as I wanted, so I started off my first day at my new HS wearing a RHCP shirt, black jean cutoffs, and earrings I handmade. I may have been a fashion police booboo, but I was a happy one. I've waivered, but I've always given up trying to be other people after a spell of trying. :)

The horror of the polyester pants! The horror!

[miettemonster]

I have often wondered about that. Sometimes I feel like I do things that I really don't need to just to be accepted. THankfully its not as bad now that I don't go to high school....

[najacheese]

I second that emotion. The funny thing is I just read an article about how women revert back to some HS behaviors between 40 and 50 b/c when the children are mostly raised women start reflecting on themselves again. My reaction was "I don't want to do HS again!!!"