...I need a break. A genuine vacation. I don't think you get those when you're poor and crazy. I think you get breakdowns.
Yes, this. I was thinking about this very thing today, only in relation to whether or not I might be coming down with pneumonia, again. And you're right, there are no vacations, just hospital stays. And those only if you're lucky.
*hugs* I know this might seem trite, but I found this website The thoughts room. It lets you write your thoughts out, to pretty, relaxing music, and your words explode into stars as you type, and fall away. It's just... I leak like a faucet every time I go to it. I've started blathering into it every night and it's felt pretty therapeutic thus far.
It's going to get better, my love. There's got to be some point to the pain and fear, right? I keep telling myself that I am not some cosmic joke, or if I must be, that it's in a Hitchhiker's Guide sort of way. I think that maybe seeing "Sorry for the inconvenience" written somewhere might help me feel less awful. Absurdity sometimes helps.
So does leaking like a faucet, once you get past the burning and puffiness and runny nose and headache afterwards, so leak away. *more hugs*
FWIW, when I'm out of the hole financially (on the plus side, my awesome, awesome friends kept Bastian's emergency from wrecking me utterly), if you guys want, I'd be happy to pay for gas/food/incidentals for you guys to come here for a week -- I have a guest room and my upstairs is really spacious (so that you could be by yourself if you needed/wanted to, there's a big "family room" up there with comfy sofas, and I know that sometimes just going away from my house, even if my friend's house isn't somehow a huge "improvement", it just helps me leave some of my troubles behind
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Yes, this. I was thinking about this very thing today, only in relation to whether or not I might be coming down with pneumonia, again. And you're right, there are no vacations, just hospital stays. And those only if you're lucky.
I'll stop before I rant.
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That's all I can say right now.
Yeah.
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It's going to get better, my love. There's got to be some point to the pain and fear, right? I keep telling myself that I am not some cosmic joke, or if I must be, that it's in a Hitchhiker's Guide sort of way. I think that maybe seeing "Sorry for the inconvenience" written somewhere might help me feel less awful. Absurdity sometimes helps.
So does leaking like a faucet, once you get past the burning and puffiness and runny nose and headache afterwards, so leak away. *more hugs*
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FWIW, when I'm out of the hole financially (on the plus side, my awesome, awesome friends kept Bastian's emergency from wrecking me utterly), if you guys want, I'd be happy to pay for gas/food/incidentals for you guys to come here for a week -- I have a guest room and my upstairs is really spacious (so that you could be by yourself if you needed/wanted to, there's a big "family room" up there with comfy sofas, and I know that sometimes just going away from my house, even if my friend's house isn't somehow a huge "improvement", it just helps me leave some of my troubles behind ( ... )
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