654 Days.

[naamah_darling]

One year, nine months, eight days.

Yet I walk into my childhood home and still expect to see my mother in the hallway.

I'm not sad, it's just . . . does the empty space where you expect them to be ever fill up? Or do we carry around these emptinesses forever, like negative silhouettes inside of us?

Comments

[goldrose]

The emptiness changed for me... and I honestly don't remember when. Now it's more like... I know she won't be there, but I still boggle at how wrong, unnatural, and unfair it is to not have her. I don't see the empty space, but I feel how much there shouldn't be an empty space. Like when you know something is missing but you aren't sure what or why.

For me, on the 14th of this month, I'll have been without her for 21 years.

[flameelf]

It doesn't seem to go away, although I see your friend with a longer loss than even mine says it changes. (For me, it was July 2000.)

A parent is your foundation, so losing one is a hole that cannot be filled.

Nechtan

[junquegrrl]

I don't know the answer to your question, but I am sending you *hugs* through the ether. I'm sorry for your loss. It's a shitty club to belong to.

[moropus]

The hole starts filling in after a while, but it is never quite the same.

[chibi_jeni]

I live in my grandparents' house right now. My grandmother passed away about 3 years ago. She was the family matriarch. She did everything for everybody, sacrificing nearly everything she had for herself.

I always expect to hear her fuss at me when I'm scolding the kids. I always expect HER to be the one who offers to make dinner instead of my grandfather. There are a lot of things that I think "I'll talk to Mema about it" but she's not there.

My grandmother was my surrogate mom. I still miss her, yes, there's a definite hole still.