Backstage Pass (Chapter 1/4) ByouxUruha, AoixUruha
Title: Backstage Pass
Chapters: 1/4
Author: mypaperdoll1611
Genre: Yaoi, Smut, Slice of Life
Warnings: usual Yaoi stuffs
Ratings: PG-13
Pairings/Characters: ByouxUruha (main), AoixUruha (one-sided)
Band: the GazettE, ScReW
Summary: I chose to dream more than to love, the pain that was destined to bear fruit. At the back of the grace of thy name, I discard every hope for our eternity. There shouldn’t be another wound to bleed, for every drop of my blood was already drained. Our path should separate from now on. I’m just a moth attracted to that dangerous fire. My wings had already taken off. No one could stop this blooming bud even those promises that once nurtured me.
Disclaimer: This story is purely fiction. Events and characters similar to true people are purely coincidental especially to Byou and Uruha. *laughs*
Comments: I decided to make a fic quite closer to reality and use the pairing I really love. Please first read the author's note below the storyline. Hope you'll like this! DUALITY lyrics translation credits to screw_lyrics
[FIRST SONG: Duality]
I chose to dream more than to love, the pain that was destined to bear fruit. At the back of the grace of thy name, I discard every hope for our eternity. There shouldn’t be another wound to bleed, for every drop of my blood was already drained. Our path should separate from now on. I’m just a moth attracted to that dangerous fire. My wings had already taken off. No one could stop this blooming bud even those promises that once nurtured me.
“I love you,” Kojima’s lips departed from Kouyou.
“See you again,” Kouyou’s palm gently cupped the other’s cheeks. It’s a typical scenery of winter. It’s cold, everything’s covered with white. The train taking Kouyou to Tokyo was about to leave. The sound of the alarm of the door closing signaled their parting ways. Kojima slowly let go of his hold to Kouyou and went off from the train.
“Oi,” Miyagi tried to support Kojima.
“Moron,” he keeps punching the ground as his blood tainted the white snow.
“This is ridiculous!” Miyagi quickly ran to see Kouyou before the doors closed.Kouyou’s leaning to the walls with a look of a lost cat. His eyes were empty. Miyagi quickly understood that everything that’s happening must be done. He could only bite his lips and let everything pass through him. Both of his friends were hurt but what else he could do, it’s Kouyou’s decision to leave.
♪ Drowning in a red sea, feeling burned, because I continue to search for you, to reach you. Tomorrow will always be another day ♪
Four years ago, Kouyou didn’t know the passion for music. It was Miyagi who set this fire alive. He introduced Kouyou’s first love, a video of Luna Sea’s music live. Their hearts crossed. They both knew what they wanted to be. It was then they drown to their addiction, the guitars.
“My first electric guitar!” Kouyou hugged it tightly. “This time, I won’t hesitate to say this… I freakin’ love my parents!”
Miyagi laughed, “Are you a kindergarten?”
A strange knock brought a wide smile to Miyagi’s cheeks. Kouyou was left wondering, “Weird…”
“Don’t weird me!” Miyagi was still smiling. “Let me introduce you to my friends…” he opened the door and two people entered. “This will be the start of our four-member band. The blond one is our drummer, Yune and the other is our vocalist.”
Kouyou was speechless.
“I’ll be doing the vocals. I’m Masahito Kojima. Nice to meet you,” he extended his hand to the other.
Kouyou shook the other’s hand, “Um… I’m Ta…Takashima Kouyou…”
Yune laughed, “Cute guy…” he brushed Kouyou’s hair making the other comfortable.
“Then, I shall be doing the bass. Kouyou, I’ll leave the guitar to you. Are you fine with this? Sorry for deciding it on my own but I just want to surprise you.”
“Ah… yeah, it’s... fine. I’m actually happy. It’s a bit fast but…”
“Everything’s going to be fast from now on. That’s why you can’t slack off. We’ll be having our first gig a week from now.”
“Oh… eh? A week?”
“What’s with the stupid look Kouyou? Everything will be fine!” Miyagi crossed his arm around Kouyou’s shoulders. “Kojima, say something!”
“Yeah, you would be fine,” his gaze was locked to the other.
“Um…” Kouyou could only nod being uncomfortable with the eyes that were piercing him.
I want to build a time machine and revisit the past. I shouldn’t have notice those feelings. We should have kept our distance. I had been hurt countless of times because of falling in love but it seems that I never learned my lesson. This thing came unexpectedly. I wasn’t able to think of my priority. Hey, Kojima, will you be sad if I told you it was never been you? Above anything else, I could only see myself with this guitar on my hand and you with that microphone singing with those red lights.
“Oi, why did you do that?” Kouyou confronted the other.
“Fanservice,” Kouyou could only walk backwards as Kojima keeps coming nearer. “It isn’t your first kiss, right?” He was locked into the cold wall.
“Fanservice? You slid your tongue inside my mouth!” Kouyou blushed with his own words. “Forget it, just don’t do it again.”
“I refuse,” Kojima angled him. His lips touched the other.
“What are you doing!” the other pushed him.
Kouyou’s resistance was futile with the other’s eyes. His strength was drained as the other planted sweet kisses unto his body, savoring his scent.
“All this time, I like you… probably,” Kouyou returned his kisses. Tiny drops of sweat were running on his burning body. His hand gently brushed the other’s hair playing down to the other’s spines.
“Then… I’ll make it sure,” Kojima swiftly laid Kouyou to the ground. He found his way between the other’s legs. Sweet mass of breaths exchanged between their kisses.
Kojima’s hand was intertwined with the other just a few inches above Kouyou’s head. Kojima kissed his lips, sweet and intimately. His lips traveled down to Kouyou’s neck, to his chest. He sensually left tiny red marks to the opposite’s body, removing every fabric that covered it. Kouyou’s white skin was covered with sweat. He played with Kojima’s crotch.
“Can I be on top?” Kojima whispered to his ears.
“I love being the bottom,” the other kissed. Kojima was silent, disappointed, “I’m just kidding,” Kouyou cupped his cheeks. “It’s my first, doing it with a guy… that’s why… I’m truly scared.”
“Unfair,” Kojima’s fingers were covered with Kouyou’s saliva. “You can read my mind and naughtily play with it but even though how much time passes by, I get lost because of you. You become more mysterious.”
“But…” Kouyou removed the other’s shirt exposing his manly built body. “I…” Kojima wrapped his arm towards Kouyou who was busy caressing Kojima’s ass.
“Stop, I’ll enter you,” Kojima pushed him to the ground. He removed his belt and lowered his pants. He raised the Kouyou’s legs and spreading it widely before finally entering his length to the Kouyou’s hole, “I do it like this.”
Kouyou couldn’t help to yell with pain, “Aren’t you cruel…” his tear-soaked face was too sexy for Kojima. “Knowing it’s my first, you wouldn’t even prepare me. Entering me like this… Nnn…” He couldn’t continue for Kojima started moving, sliding to his walls, playing to Kouyou’s member with his hand, “Don’t do that at the same time!” Kouyou cried.
Kojima smiled, “Liar. You like this, don’t you?” both of them were about to come. “Then what should I do?” He lifted Kouyou’s body in a manner that he was seated on top of Kojima. He continued to rock Kojima’s length with his insides. Both of their arms were wrapped to the other’s body.
“Come inside,” Kouyou licked his cheeks. “Please, come inside me.”
“Got it,” Kojima locked his lips to Kouyou. His tongue danced with the other. Just a snap, both of them released their white liquids. The kiss was broken. Kouyou fell to the ground, with his muscles twitching. Saliva’s dripping on his cheeks. Both of them were panting.
Kojima stood up and grabbed a blanket. It’s his room after all. Kouyou’s coming in was such an opportunity, a pleasure. He wrapped the blanket to Kouyou and lifted the other to his bed. He thought Kouyou was already asleep, drown with tiredness. He twirled his fingers to the other’s hair before cupping his cheeks and slowly planting a sweet kiss on his lips.
“Done already?” Kouyou opened his eyes and pulled the other towards him. “I thought you’re rougher than this!”
“Don’t belittle me,” Kojima surprisingly entered his two fingers to Kouyou’s entrance. “I just can’t help to remember your stare to that band’s bassist,”
“You mean Akira?” Kouyou laughed. “I’m just… I think I saw him before. We used to play soccer in the same team. I never thought he’s into music too.”
“Then what about that little drummer?” Kojima pushed his fingers deeper making Kouyou to release such a loud moan. “Do you play soccer, baseball, or basketball with him?”
“Want to know?” Kouyou shifted their position, removing Kojima’s hands off from him. He’s on top of Kojima whose body was thrown into the bed. “Are you BETTER than him?” Kouyou pushed his entrance to Kojima’s length and started to bounce up and down from Kojima’s body.
“Oi!” Kojima grabbed the other’s arm, making the other fall to him. “I’ll make sure you’ll regret those words!” they continued to fuck all night long.
♪ To cry while laughing, even though it's tough, I think I love you. Drowning in a red sea, feeling burned, I keep searching to reach you. Get answers from the evil outright distortion of a drama. Please allow me to touch you just for today. Shout out loud ♪
Kouyou was under Kojima’s embrace. Both of them were wrapped under the same blanket. Kouyou’s hands were wrapped to the other’s waist. Kojima blew white smoke from his cigarette stuck between his long fingers, between his rings. There’s a glass of wine on a table beside him. Kouyou tried to reach it, thirsty for a drink but Kojima pushed it farther away from Kouyou’s grasped.
“Hey,” Kojima sat up. “About that guy…”
“I don’t know him,” Kouyou rolled from the bed and quickly took a sip of his addiction. “Moet…”
“Eh?” Kojima was surprised. “You mean you had sex with him even though you don’t know him?” His hands were squishing Kouyou’s shoulders.
Kouyou flicked the other’s forehead, “Sex, what sex? I told you, this is my first time doing it with a man,” Kouyou stood up and went straight to the door of the bathroom. “He’s just a support drummer on that band. I think he’s a rich kid. He offered me and Akira to make a band with him. Of course, I refuse but I think Akira wants to give it a shot.”
Kojima ran towards him, “Eh, you mean that’s it, then what about me being better than him?”
Kouyou laughed as he cling his arms to Kojima’s nape, his middle finger ran to the other’s throat, twirling with his Adam’s apple, “Before that, I already had my eyes on him. Hearing him sing while composing songs, I think that little drummer is going to be an amazing vocalist,” Kouyou gave Kojima’s chest a tap before entering the shower.
“Again… it’s only music you could think of.”
Looking back at all those words, of all the time we spent together, I can be truly honest of myself. I am cheating on you. I know how much it hurt you but I couldn’t stop myself plucking these strings with all my heart. I love you as a man but not as my life. We shouldn’t have crossed the border. We should have remained as friends. I wonder how it would go on just like that. We might have been together even now.
“I don’t think I could go on, just find another drummer,” Yune lowered his head. He was talking to Miyagi and Kojima.
“But you haven’t cleared your reasons yet!” Miyagi replied. “Before we started this, you said you’re serious about it. Please don’t betray us Yune!”
“Why do you want to stop now?” Kojima was emotionless. He wasn’t frustrated, he just wanted to know.
“I just don’t think I could it with you,” Yune returned Kojima’s look.
Kouyou entered and easily understood everything that’s happening, “Yune, I thought we’re having fun. You told me we’re all going to make it to Tokyo and have fun to such a large crowd of people! How could you just leave everything undone?”
“Shut the crap!” Yune’s voice was beyond normal. “Do you think I didn’t know? Do you think Miyagi didn’t know? I don’t want to do this anymore, not with you and Kojima. I can’t stand seeing you two. It’s… disgusting,” he ran.
Kouyou’s soul was torn apart, “Disgusting?” he punched the wall. “Don’t give me that bullshit!” he managed to calm down, he leaned his forehead to the wall before falling into his knees. “Don’t just fuck with that!”
“Hey, don’t lose hope yet!” Miyagi tried to lessen the weight of the atmosphere. “We could still continue, right? There are many three man band out there! We just have to do our best and…”
“I’m quitting too,” Kojima shocked the two. Kouyou’s look was unexplainable, unbearable for Kojima’s eyes. “Let’s face it, let’s be practical! How many percent do we have for success? Aren’t we just wasting our time? We should just focus ourselves to studies and finding a career! But with music…”
“Oi, Kojima, you know what Kouyou feel about this…”
“Then a two man band would be fine,” Kouyou interrupted.
It’s Kojima’s turn to be upset. He knew Kouyou’s going to continue even with him stopping. He just hope that even just a little, he’ll feel more important that Kouyou’s passion for music. He hoped but in the end his wish will be left unfulfilled. He couldn’t bring himself to be Kouyou’s number one.
“It’s no use Kouyou. A band couldn’t stand without a vocalist, you know that right? Who would listen to two man only playing guitars?”
“Then I’ll make a band on my own,” Kouyou left.
♪ We'll always go together. Whoever is getting embraced by loneliness is waiting for a helping hand. Tomorrow will always be another day. ♪
“Hey Akira, how’s everything with Takenori?” they were lighten up by the street light, just a few meters away from a 7-eleven convenience store.
“I can’t help to admire that small guy’s determination. He wasn’t even shaken after you turned his offer down. We already have our drummer,”
“You mean, he really shifted to vocals?” Kouyou could only look to the ground. “Do you already have… a guitarist…” he mumbled not so clear for Akira’s ears. “Ah, it’s nothing. Where is he anyway?”
“Inside…” Akira smiled pointing to the store near them. “Shiroyama Yuu won’t fall but I think Takenori wouldn’t stop unless he gave him a strong reason. He’s determined to make that guy our guitarist.”
“I see,” Kouyou stood up.
“Leaving already?”
“Yeah, how about you?”
“Going to finish this smoke and bring that kid home,”
Kouyou just looked at him and walked straight but not to his house but to that convenience store. He watched how Takenori worked hard just to convince Yuu to join him, to make a band. He was just a passer by seeing his dreams being laid to him but he wouldn’t care. It’s over for him, he thought. It’s his first time to admit that music might not be really meant for him and it’s his first time meeting someone who could rebut and encourage him to continue.
“What’s my dream? It’s not to be famous. I just want to have music even everything was taken away from me. Isn’t it the same for you? Secretly borrowing your brother’s guitar even without his consent, even though you’re going to be scolded or beaten up, isn’t just passion? I want to make a band with you. I want to go to Tokyo and all round the world to share my passion. Playing in such a large venue is such a dream. Don’t you think the same? I really want to share everything, even though no one’s going to listen, I won’t stop. I’ll make them notice my feelings. I’ll risk everything just to be able to make it up to Tokyo.”
“Even though you say that…”
“I think it won’t go wrong if you do it with him,” Kouyou brought a wine to the cashier. “It won’t hurt to gamble sometimes, it’s an opportunity. Won’t you take it? And he is not the type of person who would suddenly stop at the middle… I think.” Kouyou patted Takenori.
“You’re the one playing at the…” Yuu scratched his head, “Fine, whatever! I’ll give it a try within three months but if…”
“I promise you wouldn’t quit,” Kouyou smiled and waved to the two.
“I keep waiting!” Takenori stopped Kouyou. “For our last member…”
♪ Pretending to look at the irrational magic of error, do you know that they understand your strength and weakness? I'm not running away from my weakness because only you can protect me. Raise your fist! ♪
Kouyou left with a curved on his cheeks. He didn’t notice the guy stalking him. Even though he broke his ties with his old band, he forgot the other bond he made. No matter how Kouyou tried to unite music and love, there would still be a person who would untie everything for him. He’s not only his guitarist but also his lover. Kojima knew that fact, the fact that Kouyou must had already forgotten.
“Already found it,” the void in Kouyou’s heart was already fulfilled.
Everything that I wished and dreamed for slowly takes its shape. I will stop the air from calming this fire even though I won’t be able to breathe. Just a little bit more, I would reach that stars above. To start from scratch and burry everything would be fine, as long as I have the future with me. I’ll forever sleep with the songs that were about to be given birth.
Strange hands were wrapped into his body, a voice coming from his behind made him realize that between past and future, there is something called present.
“Please don’t discard me,” tears were falling to Kouyou’s shoulders.
♪ Even if the exit is here swallowed by a wave of the heart because I keep waiting…Only your voice is the answer from the evil outright distortion of a drama. Please allow me to touch you just for today. Shout in a loud voice! ♪
A/N: Yune is the GazettE’s ex-drummer and Miyagi Yuu is known as Yuuto (ScReW’s ex-bassist). The other names were the GazettE’s members. The italic sentences were Uruha’s POV and the bold phrases enclosed with musical notes (♪) were DUALITY’s lyric translation. From now on, please do remember this. Also, this story is PURELY FICTIONAL, don’t make any meaning from this. Thank you.
Chapters: 1/4
Author: mypaperdoll1611
Genre: Yaoi, Smut, Slice of Life
Warnings: usual Yaoi stuffs
Ratings: PG-13
Pairings/Characters: ByouxUruha (main), AoixUruha (one-sided)
Band: the GazettE, ScReW
Summary: I chose to dream more than to love, the pain that was destined to bear fruit. At the back of the grace of thy name, I discard every hope for our eternity. There shouldn’t be another wound to bleed, for every drop of my blood was already drained. Our path should separate from now on. I’m just a moth attracted to that dangerous fire. My wings had already taken off. No one could stop this blooming bud even those promises that once nurtured me.
Disclaimer: This story is purely fiction. Events and characters similar to true people are purely coincidental especially to Byou and Uruha. *laughs*
Comments: I decided to make a fic quite closer to reality and use the pairing I really love. Please first read the author's note below the storyline. Hope you'll like this! DUALITY lyrics translation credits to screw_lyrics
[FIRST SONG: Duality]
I chose to dream more than to love, the pain that was destined to bear fruit. At the back of the grace of thy name, I discard every hope for our eternity. There shouldn’t be another wound to bleed, for every drop of my blood was already drained. Our path should separate from now on. I’m just a moth attracted to that dangerous fire. My wings had already taken off. No one could stop this blooming bud even those promises that once nurtured me.
“I love you,” Kojima’s lips departed from Kouyou.
“See you again,” Kouyou’s palm gently cupped the other’s cheeks. It’s a typical scenery of winter. It’s cold, everything’s covered with white. The train taking Kouyou to Tokyo was about to leave. The sound of the alarm of the door closing signaled their parting ways. Kojima slowly let go of his hold to Kouyou and went off from the train.
“Oi,” Miyagi tried to support Kojima.
“Moron,” he keeps punching the ground as his blood tainted the white snow.
“This is ridiculous!” Miyagi quickly ran to see Kouyou before the doors closed.Kouyou’s leaning to the walls with a look of a lost cat. His eyes were empty. Miyagi quickly understood that everything that’s happening must be done. He could only bite his lips and let everything pass through him. Both of his friends were hurt but what else he could do, it’s Kouyou’s decision to leave.
♪ Drowning in a red sea, feeling burned, because I continue to search for you, to reach you. Tomorrow will always be another day ♪
Four years ago, Kouyou didn’t know the passion for music. It was Miyagi who set this fire alive. He introduced Kouyou’s first love, a video of Luna Sea’s music live. Their hearts crossed. They both knew what they wanted to be. It was then they drown to their addiction, the guitars.
“My first electric guitar!” Kouyou hugged it tightly. “This time, I won’t hesitate to say this… I freakin’ love my parents!”
Miyagi laughed, “Are you a kindergarten?”
A strange knock brought a wide smile to Miyagi’s cheeks. Kouyou was left wondering, “Weird…”
“Don’t weird me!” Miyagi was still smiling. “Let me introduce you to my friends…” he opened the door and two people entered. “This will be the start of our four-member band. The blond one is our drummer, Yune and the other is our vocalist.”
Kouyou was speechless.
“I’ll be doing the vocals. I’m Masahito Kojima. Nice to meet you,” he extended his hand to the other.
Kouyou shook the other’s hand, “Um… I’m Ta…Takashima Kouyou…”
Yune laughed, “Cute guy…” he brushed Kouyou’s hair making the other comfortable.
“Then, I shall be doing the bass. Kouyou, I’ll leave the guitar to you. Are you fine with this? Sorry for deciding it on my own but I just want to surprise you.”
“Ah… yeah, it’s... fine. I’m actually happy. It’s a bit fast but…”
“Everything’s going to be fast from now on. That’s why you can’t slack off. We’ll be having our first gig a week from now.”
“Oh… eh? A week?”
“What’s with the stupid look Kouyou? Everything will be fine!” Miyagi crossed his arm around Kouyou’s shoulders. “Kojima, say something!”
“Yeah, you would be fine,” his gaze was locked to the other.
“Um…” Kouyou could only nod being uncomfortable with the eyes that were piercing him.
I want to build a time machine and revisit the past. I shouldn’t have notice those feelings. We should have kept our distance. I had been hurt countless of times because of falling in love but it seems that I never learned my lesson. This thing came unexpectedly. I wasn’t able to think of my priority. Hey, Kojima, will you be sad if I told you it was never been you? Above anything else, I could only see myself with this guitar on my hand and you with that microphone singing with those red lights.
“Oi, why did you do that?” Kouyou confronted the other.
“Fanservice,” Kouyou could only walk backwards as Kojima keeps coming nearer. “It isn’t your first kiss, right?” He was locked into the cold wall.
“Fanservice? You slid your tongue inside my mouth!” Kouyou blushed with his own words. “Forget it, just don’t do it again.”
“I refuse,” Kojima angled him. His lips touched the other.
“What are you doing!” the other pushed him.
Kouyou’s resistance was futile with the other’s eyes. His strength was drained as the other planted sweet kisses unto his body, savoring his scent.
“All this time, I like you… probably,” Kouyou returned his kisses. Tiny drops of sweat were running on his burning body. His hand gently brushed the other’s hair playing down to the other’s spines.
“Then… I’ll make it sure,” Kojima swiftly laid Kouyou to the ground. He found his way between the other’s legs. Sweet mass of breaths exchanged between their kisses.
Kojima’s hand was intertwined with the other just a few inches above Kouyou’s head. Kojima kissed his lips, sweet and intimately. His lips traveled down to Kouyou’s neck, to his chest. He sensually left tiny red marks to the opposite’s body, removing every fabric that covered it. Kouyou’s white skin was covered with sweat. He played with Kojima’s crotch.
“Can I be on top?” Kojima whispered to his ears.
“I love being the bottom,” the other kissed. Kojima was silent, disappointed, “I’m just kidding,” Kouyou cupped his cheeks. “It’s my first, doing it with a guy… that’s why… I’m truly scared.”
“Unfair,” Kojima’s fingers were covered with Kouyou’s saliva. “You can read my mind and naughtily play with it but even though how much time passes by, I get lost because of you. You become more mysterious.”
“But…” Kouyou removed the other’s shirt exposing his manly built body. “I…” Kojima wrapped his arm towards Kouyou who was busy caressing Kojima’s ass.
“Stop, I’ll enter you,” Kojima pushed him to the ground. He removed his belt and lowered his pants. He raised the Kouyou’s legs and spreading it widely before finally entering his length to the Kouyou’s hole, “I do it like this.”
Kouyou couldn’t help to yell with pain, “Aren’t you cruel…” his tear-soaked face was too sexy for Kojima. “Knowing it’s my first, you wouldn’t even prepare me. Entering me like this… Nnn…” He couldn’t continue for Kojima started moving, sliding to his walls, playing to Kouyou’s member with his hand, “Don’t do that at the same time!” Kouyou cried.
Kojima smiled, “Liar. You like this, don’t you?” both of them were about to come. “Then what should I do?” He lifted Kouyou’s body in a manner that he was seated on top of Kojima. He continued to rock Kojima’s length with his insides. Both of their arms were wrapped to the other’s body.
“Come inside,” Kouyou licked his cheeks. “Please, come inside me.”
“Got it,” Kojima locked his lips to Kouyou. His tongue danced with the other. Just a snap, both of them released their white liquids. The kiss was broken. Kouyou fell to the ground, with his muscles twitching. Saliva’s dripping on his cheeks. Both of them were panting.
Kojima stood up and grabbed a blanket. It’s his room after all. Kouyou’s coming in was such an opportunity, a pleasure. He wrapped the blanket to Kouyou and lifted the other to his bed. He thought Kouyou was already asleep, drown with tiredness. He twirled his fingers to the other’s hair before cupping his cheeks and slowly planting a sweet kiss on his lips.
“Done already?” Kouyou opened his eyes and pulled the other towards him. “I thought you’re rougher than this!”
“Don’t belittle me,” Kojima surprisingly entered his two fingers to Kouyou’s entrance. “I just can’t help to remember your stare to that band’s bassist,”
“You mean Akira?” Kouyou laughed. “I’m just… I think I saw him before. We used to play soccer in the same team. I never thought he’s into music too.”
“Then what about that little drummer?” Kojima pushed his fingers deeper making Kouyou to release such a loud moan. “Do you play soccer, baseball, or basketball with him?”
“Want to know?” Kouyou shifted their position, removing Kojima’s hands off from him. He’s on top of Kojima whose body was thrown into the bed. “Are you BETTER than him?” Kouyou pushed his entrance to Kojima’s length and started to bounce up and down from Kojima’s body.
“Oi!” Kojima grabbed the other’s arm, making the other fall to him. “I’ll make sure you’ll regret those words!” they continued to fuck all night long.
♪ To cry while laughing, even though it's tough, I think I love you. Drowning in a red sea, feeling burned, I keep searching to reach you. Get answers from the evil outright distortion of a drama. Please allow me to touch you just for today. Shout out loud ♪
Kouyou was under Kojima’s embrace. Both of them were wrapped under the same blanket. Kouyou’s hands were wrapped to the other’s waist. Kojima blew white smoke from his cigarette stuck between his long fingers, between his rings. There’s a glass of wine on a table beside him. Kouyou tried to reach it, thirsty for a drink but Kojima pushed it farther away from Kouyou’s grasped.
“Hey,” Kojima sat up. “About that guy…”
“I don’t know him,” Kouyou rolled from the bed and quickly took a sip of his addiction. “Moet…”
“Eh?” Kojima was surprised. “You mean you had sex with him even though you don’t know him?” His hands were squishing Kouyou’s shoulders.
Kouyou flicked the other’s forehead, “Sex, what sex? I told you, this is my first time doing it with a man,” Kouyou stood up and went straight to the door of the bathroom. “He’s just a support drummer on that band. I think he’s a rich kid. He offered me and Akira to make a band with him. Of course, I refuse but I think Akira wants to give it a shot.”
Kojima ran towards him, “Eh, you mean that’s it, then what about me being better than him?”
Kouyou laughed as he cling his arms to Kojima’s nape, his middle finger ran to the other’s throat, twirling with his Adam’s apple, “Before that, I already had my eyes on him. Hearing him sing while composing songs, I think that little drummer is going to be an amazing vocalist,” Kouyou gave Kojima’s chest a tap before entering the shower.
“Again… it’s only music you could think of.”
Looking back at all those words, of all the time we spent together, I can be truly honest of myself. I am cheating on you. I know how much it hurt you but I couldn’t stop myself plucking these strings with all my heart. I love you as a man but not as my life. We shouldn’t have crossed the border. We should have remained as friends. I wonder how it would go on just like that. We might have been together even now.
“I don’t think I could go on, just find another drummer,” Yune lowered his head. He was talking to Miyagi and Kojima.
“But you haven’t cleared your reasons yet!” Miyagi replied. “Before we started this, you said you’re serious about it. Please don’t betray us Yune!”
“Why do you want to stop now?” Kojima was emotionless. He wasn’t frustrated, he just wanted to know.
“I just don’t think I could it with you,” Yune returned Kojima’s look.
Kouyou entered and easily understood everything that’s happening, “Yune, I thought we’re having fun. You told me we’re all going to make it to Tokyo and have fun to such a large crowd of people! How could you just leave everything undone?”
“Shut the crap!” Yune’s voice was beyond normal. “Do you think I didn’t know? Do you think Miyagi didn’t know? I don’t want to do this anymore, not with you and Kojima. I can’t stand seeing you two. It’s… disgusting,” he ran.
Kouyou’s soul was torn apart, “Disgusting?” he punched the wall. “Don’t give me that bullshit!” he managed to calm down, he leaned his forehead to the wall before falling into his knees. “Don’t just fuck with that!”
“Hey, don’t lose hope yet!” Miyagi tried to lessen the weight of the atmosphere. “We could still continue, right? There are many three man band out there! We just have to do our best and…”
“I’m quitting too,” Kojima shocked the two. Kouyou’s look was unexplainable, unbearable for Kojima’s eyes. “Let’s face it, let’s be practical! How many percent do we have for success? Aren’t we just wasting our time? We should just focus ourselves to studies and finding a career! But with music…”
“Oi, Kojima, you know what Kouyou feel about this…”
“Then a two man band would be fine,” Kouyou interrupted.
It’s Kojima’s turn to be upset. He knew Kouyou’s going to continue even with him stopping. He just hope that even just a little, he’ll feel more important that Kouyou’s passion for music. He hoped but in the end his wish will be left unfulfilled. He couldn’t bring himself to be Kouyou’s number one.
“It’s no use Kouyou. A band couldn’t stand without a vocalist, you know that right? Who would listen to two man only playing guitars?”
“Then I’ll make a band on my own,” Kouyou left.
♪ We'll always go together. Whoever is getting embraced by loneliness is waiting for a helping hand. Tomorrow will always be another day. ♪
“Hey Akira, how’s everything with Takenori?” they were lighten up by the street light, just a few meters away from a 7-eleven convenience store.
“I can’t help to admire that small guy’s determination. He wasn’t even shaken after you turned his offer down. We already have our drummer,”
“You mean, he really shifted to vocals?” Kouyou could only look to the ground. “Do you already have… a guitarist…” he mumbled not so clear for Akira’s ears. “Ah, it’s nothing. Where is he anyway?”
“Inside…” Akira smiled pointing to the store near them. “Shiroyama Yuu won’t fall but I think Takenori wouldn’t stop unless he gave him a strong reason. He’s determined to make that guy our guitarist.”
“I see,” Kouyou stood up.
“Leaving already?”
“Yeah, how about you?”
“Going to finish this smoke and bring that kid home,”
Kouyou just looked at him and walked straight but not to his house but to that convenience store. He watched how Takenori worked hard just to convince Yuu to join him, to make a band. He was just a passer by seeing his dreams being laid to him but he wouldn’t care. It’s over for him, he thought. It’s his first time to admit that music might not be really meant for him and it’s his first time meeting someone who could rebut and encourage him to continue.
“What’s my dream? It’s not to be famous. I just want to have music even everything was taken away from me. Isn’t it the same for you? Secretly borrowing your brother’s guitar even without his consent, even though you’re going to be scolded or beaten up, isn’t just passion? I want to make a band with you. I want to go to Tokyo and all round the world to share my passion. Playing in such a large venue is such a dream. Don’t you think the same? I really want to share everything, even though no one’s going to listen, I won’t stop. I’ll make them notice my feelings. I’ll risk everything just to be able to make it up to Tokyo.”
“Even though you say that…”
“I think it won’t go wrong if you do it with him,” Kouyou brought a wine to the cashier. “It won’t hurt to gamble sometimes, it’s an opportunity. Won’t you take it? And he is not the type of person who would suddenly stop at the middle… I think.” Kouyou patted Takenori.
“You’re the one playing at the…” Yuu scratched his head, “Fine, whatever! I’ll give it a try within three months but if…”
“I promise you wouldn’t quit,” Kouyou smiled and waved to the two.
“I keep waiting!” Takenori stopped Kouyou. “For our last member…”
♪ Pretending to look at the irrational magic of error, do you know that they understand your strength and weakness? I'm not running away from my weakness because only you can protect me. Raise your fist! ♪
Kouyou left with a curved on his cheeks. He didn’t notice the guy stalking him. Even though he broke his ties with his old band, he forgot the other bond he made. No matter how Kouyou tried to unite music and love, there would still be a person who would untie everything for him. He’s not only his guitarist but also his lover. Kojima knew that fact, the fact that Kouyou must had already forgotten.
“Already found it,” the void in Kouyou’s heart was already fulfilled.
Everything that I wished and dreamed for slowly takes its shape. I will stop the air from calming this fire even though I won’t be able to breathe. Just a little bit more, I would reach that stars above. To start from scratch and burry everything would be fine, as long as I have the future with me. I’ll forever sleep with the songs that were about to be given birth.
Strange hands were wrapped into his body, a voice coming from his behind made him realize that between past and future, there is something called present.
“Please don’t discard me,” tears were falling to Kouyou’s shoulders.
♪ Even if the exit is here swallowed by a wave of the heart because I keep waiting…Only your voice is the answer from the evil outright distortion of a drama. Please allow me to touch you just for today. Shout in a loud voice! ♪
A/N: Yune is the GazettE’s ex-drummer and Miyagi Yuu is known as Yuuto (ScReW’s ex-bassist). The other names were the GazettE’s members. The italic sentences were Uruha’s POV and the bold phrases enclosed with musical notes (♪) were DUALITY’s lyric translation. From now on, please do remember this. Also, this story is PURELY FICTIONAL, don’t make any meaning from this. Thank you.